Epilogue
Ethan
Something tickles my face, and I crack one eye open to find Axel standing above our mattress, his hair sticking up in every direction, staring down at us with wide eyes.
“There are presents under the tree,” he whispers.
I blink fully awake, remembering how Cassidy and I had crept downstairs in the early morning hours after wrapping the gifts with faded paper we’d found in the attic.
We’d arranged them carefully under the tree, then collapsed onto the mattress beside Axel’s, exhausted from our sleepless night of lovemaking.
Cassidy stirs beside me. She’s wearing my T-shirt and nothing else, and I pull the blanket higher to cover her before Axel notices.
“Merry Christmas, sweetheart,” she murmurs, sitting up and smoothing down her hair.
Axel’s gaze darts between us and the tree. “Are those... for me?”
“They have your name on them, don’t they?” I ask, untangling myself from the blankets and standing.
He approaches the tree as if he’s not quite sure this is real.
“This one says ‘To Axel, From Santa,’” he reads carefully, his finger tracing each letter.
“Well then, I guess you better open it,” Cassidy says, settling cross-legged on the floor beside him.
Axel tears into the wrapping paper with enthusiasm. When the tablet emerges, his eyes go round as saucers.
“Is this really mine?” he breathes.
“Really yours,” I confirm, crouching beside them. “It’s got games and books already loaded on it.”
He clutches it to his chest, then reaches for the next package. The clothes aren’t exciting by most kids’ standards, but Axel examines each item like they’re treasure.
The sunglasses make him laugh. A sound I realize I’ve never heard from him before.
When he puts them on, he looks like a miniature movie star, and Cassidy giggles, leaning into me. “Very cool,” she declares, and Axel grins so wide I can see the gap where he lost a tooth.
The cologne makes him scrunch his nose when he sniffs it, then his face lights up. “Like Mr. Ethan,” he says.
“Just like me,” I manage.
Axel carefully arranges all his gifts in a neat pile. When he’s satisfied, he looks up at us with shining eyes.
“Thank you. These are the best presents ever.”
“You’re very welcome, sweetheart,” Cassidy says, reaching out to smooth his hair.
Then his expression shifts, becoming uncertain again. “Can I take these with me when I go to my new family?”
The question stops my heart. Beside me, Cassidy goes perfectly still.
“Axel,” I start carefully, “remember when you asked me if I was your father?”
His face immediately shutters, and he looks down at his hands. “Yes,” he whispers. “I’m sorry. I know you don’t want me to know, but Mama told me. She said you were my daddy, but you didn’t want me cause I’m bad.”
“Oh, sweetheart,” Cassidy breathes, reaching for him, but he shrinks back.
I swallow hard, my throat burning. “Axel, I am your father.”
His bottom lip starts to tremble. “I know you don’t want me,” he whispers, tears beginning to roll down his cheeks. “It’s okay. Mama said I’m a whiny pest, and that’s why you never came. I’ll try to be better for my new family.”
I drop to my knees in front of him, bringing us to eye level. “Axel, look at me.”
He reluctantly meets my gaze, tears streaming down his face.
“You are not a pest. You are not whiny. You are not bad.” My voice is fierce, urgent. “You are smart, and kind, and brave. You are patient when things are hard. You take care of yourself when adults should have been taking care of you. You are everything good in this world.”
His chin wobbles. “But you didn’t come see me.”
“That’s because I made mistakes. Big ones. But none of it was your fault.” I reach out slowly and cup his face. “You are wanted, Axel. By me. And by your aunt Cassidy. So very much.”
“Really?” The word is barely a breath.
“Really,” Cassidy responds.
I brush away his tears with my thumbs. “I want to teach you how to throw a baseball. I want to help you with homework. I want to take you to school and pick you up and read you bedtime stories. I want to be your dad, if you’ll let me.”
He stares at me for a long moment, hope and fear warring in his expression.
Cassidy scoots closer, her hand settling on Axel’s shoulder. “And I want to be your family too,” she says softly. “Ethan and I—we want to create a family together. But we need you to help us do that.”
“You want my help?” Axel asks.
“We can’t be a family without you,” I tell him. “You’re the most important part.”
“You really want me? Even though I wet the bed?”
“Oh, sweetheart,” Cassidy says. “Lots of children wet the bed sometimes. That doesn’t make you bad or unwanted. It just means your body is still learning, and that’s perfectly normal.”
“And I can keep all my presents?”
“You can keep the gifts,” I assure him. “And next Christmas, there will be even more.”
“And I won’t have to say sorry for crying?”
“Never,” I say firmly. “Good families don’t hurt kids for having feelings.”
Axel is quiet for a long moment, his gaze moving from his gifts to our faces. Then he suddenly launches himself forward, wrapping his thin arms around both of our necks in a fierce hug.
“I love you, Daddy,” he says against my shoulder.
The word stops my breath. Daddy. Not Mr. Ethan. Daddy.
“I love you too, son,” I whisper back. “So much.”
Cassidy wraps her arms around both of us, and I wrap my free arm around her waist as she melts against us. Over Axel’s head, I kiss her lips.
When he finally pulls back, his eyes are bright. “Are we really a family now?”
“We really are,” Cassidy confirms, smoothing his hair back from his forehead. “The paperwork might take a little while, but in our hearts we’re a family.”
Axel looks between us, then down at his pile of gifts, then back up with a wide smile. “This is the best Christmas ever.”
“The first of many,” I tell him, ruffling his hair. “We have a lot of Christmases to make up for.”
“Can we make pancakes now?” he asks. “Family pancakes?”
“Family pancakes it is,” Cassidy laughs, standing and extending her hands to both of us. “Come on, boys. Let’s go make our first Christmas breakfast together.”
As we head toward the kitchen, Axel tugs on my hand. “Daddy? Remember when you said some gifts aren’t toys and stuff?”
I pause, remembering the conversation from yesterday. “I do.”
“I think I got all the kinds!” he says, bouncing a little. “I needed a family, and now I have you and Aunt Cassidy. I wanted presents, and I got lots. And the surprise—” He grins up at us. “The surprise is you both want to keep me!”
Cassidy’s eyes fill with tears. “That’s exactly right, sweetheart.”
Sometimes the best gifts can’t be wrapped.
Sometimes they’re found in the most unexpected places, born from heartbreak and forgiveness, and strong enough to heal years of pain.
Other times they come in the form of a little boy who just wants to belong, and two adults who finally understand that home isn’t a place, it’s the people you choose to love.