Chapter 50 Violet
FIFTY
VIOLET
NOVEMBER | COLUMBUS, OHIO
Colton and I snuggled on his couch Wednesday night, playing a movie we were only half paying attention to. We had a lot to celebrate, but we didn’t feel like going out. The prior two weeks held so many changes that we decided to eat something his chef made and stay home.
The Rusties stopped losing, for one. They were now on a seven-game winning streak.
Colton and I decided we weren’t faking. Colt beat up the bad guy.
We admitted we love each other, present tense.
I deleted my social media so no one could bother me about all the noise out there.
It actually made me text with my family more, which was surprisingly enjoyable.
I started joining Jeanine at ice dancing classes and I only had a handful of bruises to show for it.
And finally, the bad guy got what he deserved, but it still stirred up a lot of big emotions.
In short, Colton and I were exhausted. But we had each other.
Colt hadn’t said anything or moved in a bit, so I turned to see if he was sleeping. He wasn’t, just staring off into space.
“What’s up?”
Colton took a deep breath and pinched his lips together.
“And don’t say ‘nothing,’ because you have your upset thinking face on.”
Colt’s lips twitched. “See my usual smart and annoying argument about you.”
“Yeah, yeah. Old news. Tell me what’s up.”
He sat up and put me where he wanted me: sitting in his lap with my legs behind his back. “I’m sorry you had to delete your accounts. I feel like this is my fault.”
I struggled not to laugh. “Colton, do you know how nice life is outside of social media?”
“I can only imagine,” he said darkly. “It’s pretty bad on there. It’s been a few days and people are still talking about Doyle, and you, and me. I mean, people are celebrating me, saying I knew and was doing some vigilante justice shit—”
“Which, they’re not wrong,” I said.
“Yeah. They’re not wrong,” he said. “But I don’t want it to be about me and him, or anybody else. I don’t expect the public to get excited about you and me, and I know you probably don’t even want that kind of attention.”
I chuckled. “You are correct. I do not crave the public’s approval of our relationship. But I know you like being in everyone’s good graces, and that’s okay.”
“I feel stupid for it. That stuff really doesn’t matter and I know it.”
I held his hands between us. “I’ll make you a deal.”
“Making deals again, are we?” His eyes widened. “I’m not going back to fake, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“No, not that. I want you to tell your Coach you’re having trouble with this stuff. Ask to see a psychologist. A therapist. Anybody who’s good at this. Okay?”
Colton sighed. “Smart, annoying, yet again.” He leaned in to kiss me. “What’s my end of the deal?”
“Oh, you mean other than improved mental health and not feeling like shit all the time?” I asked.
He laughed and shrugged. “Yeah. Other than that.”
“You drive a hard bargain, Jones.” I moved my hands to his shoulders and sat up more in his lap. “I promise I’ll make it worth your while.”
“Oh yeah?” Colt asked.
I started to peel up the bottom of my shirt. “Yeah.”
“Okay,” Colt said, hands coasting up the bare skin on my back. “Deal.”
VIOLET
who wants to help me with a grand gesture?
JEANINE
i’m listening.
MARA
i’ll order you my favorite strap. you’re going to love it
do you think Colt would wear a collar?
VIOLET
funny you ask, when we first met he offered
MARA
i knew he was one of us
so we’re going full kink town?
VIOLET
not exactly, but I love the sentiment
MARA
BOOOOOOO
JEANINE
BOOOOOOO
VIOLET
we’re going full ice crew kiss cam
MARA
the locker scene? i thought you already did that
VIOLET
wtf
MARA
what? i wasn’t born yesterday. i can put two and two together
you didn’t invent locker room shenanigans
JEANINE
god mara stay on task
so which scene? the actual titular ice crew kiss cam scene????
VIOLET
the actual ice crew kiss cam scene
MARA
alright fine that’s cute
he’ll love that
JEANINE
lfg
I put on a fresh layer of lip gloss and adjusted the ribbon binding my half-up hair. “Not at all scary. Just a public love declaration when people think I’m a cheating harlot.”
It was the second intermission of the Rusties’ first home game post-Dallas debacle.
“Which has been discredited,” Jeanine said.
“And you have no speaking lines,” Mara offered.
“But I have to not wipe out,” I countered.
“You did great on the ice the other day. You’ll be fine,” Jeanine said.
“Yeah, well, I didn’t push a shovel when we practiced.”
Jeanine patted my thigh. “Even if you wipe out, he’s going to love the hell out of you. He’d probably pick you up.”
The Zamboni left the ice and we had two minutes until the third period.
I chuckled. “Probably. Well, here I go. Wish me luck.”
“You don’t need it,” Mara said. “Have fun down there.”
I left our seats and met the arena rep at the top of the stairs. She held my bag of skates out to me, the one I’d dropped at their offices earlier that day. “Ready?”
“As I’m going to be,” I said.
“This will be great for Colt’s PR. I know everything’s been so stressful with the . . . situation.”
“Yeah. He needs a personal win.”
My hands started to shake as we walked, making small talk as we went. I greeted the head of the ice crew and got some pointers on pushing the shovel. “You’re going to do great,” she assured me. “This is such a cute idea. Now I’ll have to read the book!”
“It’s a good one,” I said, shaking out my hands and blowing a breath through tight lips.
A woman with a short blonde bob wearing a Rusties polo appeared at my side. “Are you Violet?” She stuck her hand out. “I’m Emma, Mara’s friend in athlete nutrition.”
“Oh, gosh. Thank you so much for helping me sort all this out! It’s so nice to finally meet you.”
She waved a hand. “What can I say? I’m a romance skeptic. I had to come see it to believe it. Are you nervous?”
“Terribly,” I said. The ice crew captain beckoned me to wait for the next time out. “Anyway. This is it.”
I checked in with myself as we waited in the tunnel. The liquid stomach feeling I had mirrored the one I got every time I had to give a presentation. Why was I putting myself through this?
Because Colton was the one. He was the one I’d choose over and over, the sunshine of my life. He, his mind, his body, every part of his being, was
His face at the back of a dark auditorium at Alden while I gave a presentation, smile wide, eyes bright. So proud.
His hands reaching for me while he knelt on the dance floor at Kitty’s wedding. Laughing, singing, bringing the party.
His intensity when he said we weren’t over in that hotel room.
His words laid bare in a text message. I love(d) you.
His arms so tight around me when I called for him, shoulders and back wet from the pouring rain.
His kiss in a dark storage closet at work.
The way he got so deeply touched if I did even the tiniest nice thing for him.
His heart thumping under my hand in the locker room when he told me it wasn’t fake.
His eyes over my shoulder in the mirror while we worked through my deepest fears.
I could never ask or even wish for more than what Colton Jones had to offer.
And it was time to show him that.
The TV timeout got called and the door to the ice opened. “Showtime!” the crew captain said.
I tripped at the first push on my shovel’s handle.
Being on the ice crew seemed like a good idea when I cooked this up a few days before.
Now when push came to literal shove, it wasn’t so easy to shovel loose, shaved ice and skate at the same time.
But after a couple of pushes, I got the hang of it.
On my first pass, I spotted Colton standing on the ice with his back to me.
“Go get him, girlie,” the captain said. “They’re starting the kiss cam.”
I skated along the wall, pushing the shaved ice ahead of me. When I reached Colton’s side, a red light went on behind the bench. I tapped him on the shoulder, or rather, the shoulder pad, but he felt it and turned.
“Violet!” Colt’s eyes widened as he looked me up and down. “You’re an ice girl?”
A loud cheer came from the crowd.
I pretended to curtsy with a skirt that I didn’t have. “Looks like it.”
He had the brightest smile, sparkling eyes, upper lip lifted slightly like he did when he was so deeply happy. He wrapped an arm around my waist and I rested mine on his upper arm, clutching behind his neck. He dipped to kiss the top of my head, and the crowd booed.
“Wait . . .” Colton turned to look up at the jumbotron in the middle of the arena. “No way.”
The cheering got louder and my face felt blazing hot. I couldn’t stop laughing, both from nerves and the sheer joy of it. I was willing to make a fool of myself for Colton. When he looked back down into my eyes, he started to laugh too. “Ice Crew Kiss Cam?”
I nodded. “I think they’re waiting on us, Cap.”
He turned so we were stomach to stomach, pulled off his helmet, latched his arm across my mid back, and lifted me to kiss him.
Colton Jones, in all his smelly hockey gear, in all his patience and optimism, in all his pain and waiting, kissed me like he meant it—and I knew he did. His stick and helmet clattered on the ice as he let them go to kiss me harder. When he started to slip me tongue, I pulled away to his laugh.
“Colt!”
He just beamed. “I love you so much. I love your ribbon.”
“I know. I wanted to show everybody how much I love you.”
“You’re shaking,” he shouted over the roar of the crowd.
“I’m nervous!”
“No need to be nervous, baby. I love this. Love you. Let’s give ‘em what they want.”
He kissed me again, while his teammates whistled and banged their sticks on the wall, as did the opposing team.
And I savored the experience, a watershed moment. The end of an era of pain, and the beginning of the life I always wanted with the man who waited.
A love that, despite the universe’s best attempts, was untouchable.