Chapter 24 #4
Taking a sip of the port to fortify his nerves, he took up the chocolate and rapped on the door.
“Elizabeth, your chocolate is here.” There was no reply. “Dearest, please open the door. I’m sorry, my love. I didn’t mean to upset you. Please open the door and let me talk to you.”
Elizabeth debated whether or not she should let him in.
She was very angry with him, and he was being very difficult.
But they were also very newly married and she did not want to set a dangerous precedent.
Her parents often argued and then would be silent, her father locked in his bookroom and her mother ignoring him whenever they were in a room together.
She did not wish such a marriage for herself.
She would hear her husband. Even if it took more patience and humility than she currently possessed.
He stood there for what felt like ages before he heard soft footsteps and the click of the lock. She pulled the door back and stood behind it, using it as a barrier between them. He stepped in slowly and placed the chocolate on the table by the bed.
“Elizabeth, I —” he looked at her, her eyes red and her cheeks wet, and felt himself the worst sort of brute. “God, Elizabeth, I am so sorry! I don’t know what came over me! I didn’t mean it, truly. I was just—please, my love, forgive me?”
She looked at him warily, not sure what to believe or that she even understood what was happening. She’d never seen a lovers’ quarrel before and this was more than they’d experienced in their courtship, which had been far from smooth. He’d actually raised his voice to her!
“I hate to see your tears. Please, let me make it better,” he pled.
“How do you plan to manage that?” she asked skeptically.
He looked dumbfounded for a moment and she found it irritatingly endearing. “I will start by apologizing profusely.”
“I believe you’re well on your way there.”
He took a small step toward her, a contrite look on his face. She responded with a step closer to him.
He made up the remaining distance and tentatively took her in his arms. Her arms hung limply by her side, not returning his embrace.
“Will you forgive me for being a brute?”
“Of course.” She brought her hands up to rest lightly on his elbows, not prepared to go further just yet.
“I am so sorry, my love. You are right. I was being spoiled. I didn’t get what I wanted and acted like a child. Forgive me.”
“You are forgiven, Mr. Darcy. I apologize for calling you hateful. It was unkind. Forgive me?” She looked up at him, completely drained and wanting nothing more than for them to make peace and go to bed with her chocolate.
“Of course. This whole thing was my fault.”
He held her a little distance away from him and observed her while she played with the lapels of his dressing gown. Finally, she spoke.
“Can you tell me why you thought I was avoiding you? And what offense you have taken at my dressing gown?” she asked, confused.
He flushed. “You have been quiet. It is unlike you and you have also usually worn… different types of gowns to bed and coupled together I thought you were trying to put me off.”
He flushed a bit and looked around self-consciously and she understood it cost something of his pride to make the confession.
“Oh. I see. Well, since we are being honest, I was trying to put you off,” she said to the floor.
He stiffened beneath her palms and his hands clenched where they held her elbows.
“You see, I have not been feeling well because, because my time is here,” she said quietly.
“Your time?”
“Yes. My courses. Are you familiar with such things?”
“Oh, I hadn’t realized. Naturally you would, I don’t know why I didn’t think,” he trailed off, embarrassed.
“Yes, well, I shall feel better in a few days, but for now, I ache in my middle and have a headache and not much patience I’m afraid.
” At his dismayed expression, she added, “It is not always so painful. Most are not so bad, but I think this one is exacerbated by the travel and perhaps all the excitement of late.”
He nodded. “I feel dreadful, Elizabeth. What a terrible husband I’ve been, and we’ve only just begun!”
“Do not say such things,” she said firmly but kindly.
Her hand stroked his cheek as she continued.
“I could have told you earlier and avoided this misunderstanding. I was embarrassed and didn’t know how to have such a conversation with a man, let alone one with such intimate access to my person.
” She blushed at her speech but held his gaze.
He placed his hand over hers on his cheek and smiled at her lovingly. “Is there anything I can do for your comfort? Anything you require?”
“I have asked for everything I need and hopefully the servant will bring it soon,” she replied.
“Oh, that reminds me, the maid said they have what you requested and will bring it later this evening.”
“Very good. It is a most inconvenient time to be without my maid!”
“That was also my idea because I wanted you all to myself. Is there no end to my selfishness?”
“Stop it, Fitzwilliam! I didn’t know this would happen.
If I had, I would have asked to keep the servants with us.
You must understand that I am no child who needs everything done for her.
If I need something, I can and will say something.
You mustn’t take care of me like an infant. All right?” she said firmly.
He smiled. “All right.” He kissed her hands one at a time and asked, “Does that often happen? It arrive unexpectedly?” Darcy liked to be prepared and if they would need to always travel with his wife’s maid in future, he wanted to know.
“It is not completely unexpected. It is once a month. The exact day varies, but not by more than a few days. I thought it might begin at the end of our journey and I was hoping it wouldn’t happen until we arrived, but it was not to be.”
“Forgive my impertinence, but how long does it usually last?” He flushed as he asked and she would have laughed at his discomfort if she hadn’t been so uncomfortable herself.
“Usually four or five days.”
“At least you will be able to enjoy The Lakes right away then.”
“Yes, that is one happy turn.”
There was a rap on the door and Darcy left her to the maid’s attention.
He paced back and forth in the sitting room, disgusted with his own spoilt behavior, relieved they had reconciled, disappointed that his lovely wife was unavailable for the immediate future, and feeling a tendril of hope that it would all be well once they got to The Lakes.