Chapter 7
VALENTINA
The rest of the day after dropping Namazzi off was spent holed up in my studio, finishing the painting of her.
The red she had chosen was the perfect colour for her lingerie.
When I stepped away, I felt the captivating stare of my girl, the warmth of her smile and the suppleness of her skin, as if she were here with me now.
It was my best piece. I had been painting for as long as I could remember, but this was the first time the painting truly came alive.
This would be my show. It would centre around Sunshine, my muse.
V: Are you working tonight?
Sunshine: No, but I don’t think we should see each other again.
Not this again. How could she be retreating once more after such a perfect night together?
I knew for a fact that she wanted me nearly as much as I wanted her.
The voices in her head and the self-doubt could not have changed her mind this quickly.
No, something must have happened. This was fear speaking but fear of what I wasn’t sure.
I had been planning to throw on the wheel; I wanted to create a vase for my girl for her eclectic apartment.
While rifling through her cupboards in search of plates, I realised she didn’t have one, and if I wanted to give her flowers, she would need one.
There was no point in creating one if she shut me out, so I couldn’t let that happen.
When I got to the store, I found a stranger behind the register who said Sunshine had left not long after her shift had begun. Speeding to her apartment, a sinking feeling settled in my stomach.
I slammed on her door, calling her name, but there was no response. Fear crept up my spine and tickled my mind. Calling her phone, there was no answer, but I could hear the faint vibrations on the other side of the door.
I looked for spare keys under the mat but there was nothing. I had two options: smash down the door to check if she was okay, or call the landlord, but that would take too long. My mind went through every worst-case scenario imaginable.
Taking a deep breath and remembering that I was the youngest member of a criminal empire, I pulled the miniature lock-picking kit Z had gifted me from my keys and began working on picking her lock.
Was I, quite possibly, insane at that moment for trying to break into the home of the girl who said she didn’t want to see me anymore?
Yes, especially considering I barely knew her.
But this wasn’t selfish now; no, I was worried about her.
Something didn’t feel right and if there was one thing I learned from my brothers, was to trust my instincts.
If she truly wanted me gone, she wouldn’t have left an opening by telling me she was off work tonight.
She wouldn’t have been off sick, and she would be opening this door right now to tell me to fuck off if that’s what she wanted.
She wouldn’t cower from me; she was emboldened by me, taking exactly what she wanted from me.
Nervous at times, yes, but never scared to face me.
The door clicked as the final internal pieces unlocked.
Walking inside the apartment was dark, with massive curtains drawn, covering the vast windows and casting shadows in the early afternoon.
I called for her, but there was no response.
Flicking on the lights, I found the little studio empty.
Her phone was on the kitchen counter, accompanied by a slightly unnerving number of missed calls.
Two were from me, but the other twenty were from an unknown number.
Instinctively, I knew what had caused this—something or rather, someone from her past that she had been running from had finally caught up with her.
The sound of the shower drew me in; the door was wide open, and there my Sunshine sat on the floor of her shower—naked, bruised, and lifeless except for the rise and fall of her chest. She stared blankly at the tiles, neither seeing me nor noticing my presence.
Her deep skin was a muddled mess of bruises that covered nearly every limb and the side of her body. Her lip was split but there didn’t appear to be anything visibly broken. Blood was caked beneath her nails and mascara streaked her face. My poor girl.
Stepping under the spray fully clothed I pulled her into my lap holding her, letting her feel my promise, that I would never let her go.
I was here; I was hers, and nothing would ever hurt her again.
She didn’t react, remaining stuck in the dark recesses of her mind.
So much time passed that the water turned cold.
Gently I carried her to the bed, placing her down with a towel wrapped around her as I found her something warm to wear.
Then I clothed her and tucked her under the covers, before sending a quick text to my brother.
Slowly I peeled my own soaking wet clothes off and as they hit the floor with a loud squelch her head snapped up, drawing her focus.
Her cloudy eyes became clearer. She watched me undress, mouth agape, brows furrowed in confusion.
As if noticing my presence for the first time today and not quite understanding whether I was real or just a figment of her imagination, she took me in.
I threw on an oversized shirt of hers on then bundled up with her under the covers, holding her close.
She gripped me tightly as she tried to hold back the sobs that finally escaped her body.
It wasn’t the physical pain of the marks left on her body.
No, this was a heart-wrenching pain that came with losing a part of your soul; her heart was breaking for herself right now and I vowed I would piece it back together.
‘Sunshine, please tell me what happened. I need to know,’ I asked when her sobbing calmed as I stroked along her back in soothing circles.
She took a few deep breaths, finally looking back at me.
She was in turmoil; I could see every emotion flickering through those beautiful, deep brown eyes.
Gone was her signature grin; her face was slack with exhaustion now.
‘Why are you here, V?’ she asked, starting to pull away as she remembered the message she had sent. But even as her mind told her body to create distance between us, I felt her hands tighten over my shirt, not wanting to let go.
‘I’m here because I was worried about you.
I knew that message was bullshit, darling.
I went to your work to check what had happened and they told me you went home sick.
I knew something was wrong; I’m just sorry I was right.
Now you need to get over this notion that you’re going to push me away and deal with this by yourself.
I know I sound insane right now Sunshine, but I think I love you.
I think I fell in love with you the moment our eyes locked at that club, and you have overtaken every fibre of my being since.
So, I’m not going anywhere. Not when I know you want me too.
’ The tears streaked down her face again as she buried herself in my shoulder.
Stroking her wet braids, I hummed, trying to sooth her.
‘I mean it, Sunshine. I love you. Now let me help you.’ She wasn’t ready.
Not just yet. Gently removing her hands from me I stepped back into her bathroom and grabbed a few supplies before laying them out on her bedside table.
I needed to show her how much I cared, not simply declare it hoping she would believe it.
Picking up the microfibre towel I squeezed the excess moisture starting from the roots to the ends of her braids.
Once I removed as much as I could I used the hairdryer to dry the rest. It didn’t take long for her to settle into the moment.
Once there wasn’t a lick of moisture left, I used the oil blend I found.
A mixture of tea tree oil and jojoba and massaged it into her scalp, gently working the oil in.
She fully relaxed into me then as the last of her tears dried.
Slowly she composed herself but kept her head down; whatever she had to say was layered in shame. She couldn’t look at me, but whatever it was, it wasn’t her shame to bear. Cupping her chin, I tilted her head up, locking her eyes on mine.
Swallowing, she gathered her courage. ‘It was Jason, my ex. He saw us in the morning. I thought he had skipped town after my boss threatened him the last time he came by the club, but apparently, he’s been watching me.
I didn’t even know he knew where my new apartment was; I thought I was safe.
He was angry, though, after… he saw us kiss.
He came in while I was still setting up the store.
He said I was his, that I would always be his, and that it was bad enough I whored around for a job; now I was just a common street slut.
H-He said he would kill you; he’d make me watch and then I would know my place.
That he owned me and that I could never find happiness with anyone else.
He would always be there. Th-then he beat me until I apologised.
I refused but it just made him angrier and the hits harder, but I couldn’t apologise.
It felt like denying us and I didn’t want to.
He sent that message from my phone. It wasn’t me, but now maybe it should have been. ’
I had to hold back my laugh at his threat to kill me; I’d love to see him try.
I may not be as deep into the underworld as my brothers were, because I had other goals, but I had trained alongside them.
They knew I would never be wholly safe and they wanted me to know what to do if the worst ever happened.
I kissed her gently, mindful of her split lip.
‘You’re not a whore. You’re not his. You belong to no one.
He will not hurt me and I promise you, Sunshine, he will never hurt you again.
’ I kissed her forehead, then each cheek, followed by her chin and then the tip of her nose, so delicately, lovingly.
I hoped she could hear the conviction in my voice and feel it with every touch.
I had no doubts that I had spoken nothing but the truth. I would protect her.
‘Collect your things, you’re coming home with me. It’s not safe for you here.’ She began to shake her head, trying to find a good argument, but I stopped her.
‘I know you have been fighting this battle alone for a long time, but right now, you need to trust me. Trust that I have got you. Please let me keep you safe. I can’t leave you here.’
She looked into my eyes and saw that there would be no winning this one, so I packed a bag as she pointed to the things she needed most. This morning, when I left her place, I had been planning to invite her to dinner to meet my brothers.
Now, it turned out that it would happen much sooner than expected.
Although I had wished it would be under better circumstances for her sake.
I didn’t know how she would react to meeting them.
I felt I should give her some warning, but she seemed exhausted. It could wait.