26. Feelings for Two
Chapter 26
Feelings for Two
I wasn’t sure for what reason being in the predicament I was with Cassius made me think about Sloan and wish I could see him, or why that morning I pocketed the ring the Jason Statham sounding Hunter gave me, but all day it was Sloan I thought about in quiet moments and not the Austrian at my side.
Even after I promised myself I wouldn’t.
Every sly smile and playful word Phillip gave me was a dagger to the heart. Last time I’d felt like this, it was when I was with Nigel. Why the fuck was history repeating itself? It didn’t fail to confuse me why it was Sloan I worried most about having pheromone-altered feelings. It should be Phillip. Why wasn’t it Phillip? Was I truly broken, or did the Brit work his way into my heart without me noticing?
Like, what the fuck, V? Are you really the girl who finally gets the person you’re supposed to love back, only to realize you have feelings for someone else? Are you really that thirsty?
It was like I hadn’t any fucking clue about my own feelings at all. Granted, I was new to adult relationships, and really options in general when it came to having them, so it wasn’t like I’d suddenly understand how this all worked. But I thought I was mature enough to avoid— I don’t know —falling for more than one person at a time .
Could this be the Siren in me talking? A convenient excuse, but one I was desperate to blame. It seemed a little too high of a hurdle to blame youthful hormones at this stage, though I’d shamelessly fall back onto that excuse if that time came.
I’d lied to myself for less.
Still, I couldn’t help myself anymore. All I could think about was if Sloan’s feelings were real from the beginning or influenced by pheromones? Was there any way to find out for sure? Would I ever see him again?
He’d gone with Grams and Kris after I burned down Lux’s hidden underground lab of horrors. I hadn’t really given the dude any reason to stay because I was the real asshole here.
Ugh, I’m the worst.
I thought I’d done away with my feelings for Sloan, blaming misplaced emotion from when Phillip abandoned me, but the memory of the man’s solemn face when I left him in the desert and his gentle, welcoming smile every time our eyes met suggested I’d only let the excitement of Phillip returning hide all the feelings that still lingered for the sultry-sweet Brit.
Once the passionate haze of Phillip’s return eased and the reality of my situation came a-knocking, those stuffed-down feelings came bubbling back up.
I wanted to see Sloan again, to touch him and hear his husky laughter, to learn more about who he was now and in the past. And when I was really honest with myself, I wanted to kiss and feel his hands on me again—to finally do everything I fantasized about doing with the gorgeous Hunter.
Shit was complicated .
Okay, so it was complicated from the start, but now I wasn’t sure what was still there when it came to Sloan. I felt like I owed it to him to figure it out. Really, I owed it to myself because I’d promised myself not to forgive Phillip so easily after the shit he pulled.
And then what did I go do? I got lost inside his addictive caress and dutifully followed Phillip’s lead yet again. He played me like a well-tuned instrument, and it was time to acknowledge I wasn’t going to be confident in my relationships until it was me taking charge and not the other person.
The question of my Siren blood aside, Phil came swooping in, evading true punishment, and worked his way back into my heart. The arrogant bastard shouldered the other man out of the way, and I just watched it happen. Again. But the fact that Phillip kept something so important from me after promising he’d tell me it all, saying it was out of misguided protection the same way Nigel once claimed, something the Austrian made damn sure to call out, made my stomach twist and knot uncomfortably.
Like the definition of insanity, I continued to expect different results with Phillip, sure that the Austrian would be a different person today than he was yesterday.
It was a reminder that Phil didn’t truly regard me as a fellow Hunter, and that at one point he’d abandoned me for that reason—that he’d gotten away with breaking my heart to pieces, taking me for granted, and then reclaiming me as his with a pushy personality the minute he returned. Worse, I’d forgiven him without putting up a fight.
I’ve been bamboozled by a blue-eyed bastard.
I’d let Nigel take the lead. Then Phil. But I was the main chick in this fucked up tale of a vengeful woman looking to overthrow the people who made her, and I’d be damned if I didn’t take charge of my own story from here.
I looked at the bastard in question, and his cocky smile hit differently after the thoughts in my head soured. Phillip’s eyes flitted away and my jaw clenched down in spite, angry he was an oblivious asshole when it suited him. Cassius grumbled about walking before our gazes connected. Then Phillip was pointing to a tree, and I wandered over to it with Cash in tow.
“I’ll take a little peek at what we’re dealing with. Shouldn’t take me more than a few minutes, so keep an eye on this saucy wanker while I’m gone,” Phillip ordered, making the Fae beside me swiftly vocalize his outrage.
The Austrian didn’t stay long enough to hear Cash whine about it, so we both went silent for a moment. I was still pissed at the Dark Fae jerk for swindling me into a favor, but I didn’t have anyone else to blame but myself.
“There’s a way to temper a Siren’s influence,” Cassius volunteered out of nowhere, and my eyes shot over to him. “It’s not an easy task, but you’re lucky enough to know an extremely talented enchanter,” he gloated before pulling a bracelet from his pocket. “Consider this a peace offering for tricking you into helping me. Truth be told, I couldn’t ask anyone else, and I’m grateful you’ve kept it to yourself.”
Dangling the dainty piece of jewelry in front of my face, the Dark Fae offered it to me. And when I only stared at the bracelet with understandable doubt, Cassius sighed dramatically and bent over towards his leg, showcasing his impressive flexibility and absently making me wonder if he was a dancer.
Lifting the hem of his pants, he revealed a similar bracelet locked around his ankle. “I told you there was a way to ensure I wasn’t influenced, love,” the purple-eyed menace explained. “If you want to know Phillip’s or…perhaps, someone not presently here,” the presumptuous bastard uttered, and it took all my Hunter training not to let the shock show on my face, “then you should wear it and see if their attitude changes towards you.”
The desperation to know exactly what Sloan felt for me should I ever come back in contact with him—and even Phillip—overpowered sense. Disregarding the fact that I’d ignored my partner’s advice twice now about not trusting Cash, I took the bracelet and stared down at the delicate chain with sparkling gems placed every half-inch.
Cassius stood, smirking, as I put it on, no longer hesitating like a smart-ass Hunter would. I’d blame youth for this short-sighted indiscretion. I was too far gone with the yearning to know what the men in my life truly felt for me, and I’d pretend I wasn’t warned vehemently to never trust an evil bastard like Cash by both Grams and Phillip.
I’ll regret this someday.
Before I could say anything else, a sensation hit out of nowhere and I spun around, crossbow in hand, only to find a familiar figure of a man I’d spent all day thinking about. “How—”
“Didn’t think I’d leave you and Phillip alone for too long? Besides, you removed my ring,” Sloan said, his voice like a fantasy come to life. His eyes flicked over to Cassius, and the Dark Fae straightened, fear in his eyes. “I’ve come for a much-needed row, and I see there will be plenty of opportunity.”
“Row?” I asked, not understanding British terms in the least. “Like, as in a boat? ”
Sloan’s rich laughter was like coming home after a long stay away, and I did my best not to smile like a total goof in response. “A fight, love. It’s time I stop playing second fiddle.”
I really didn’t know what Sloan was on about—I’d never understand British people, let alone dudes in general—but it was so good to see him again.
I’d spent so long trying to recall the details of Sloan’s face, his body, his brilliant pale-blue eyes and good-looking dude smile, that it almost didn’t seem real to see them exactly how I remembered them right in front of me.
His gorgeous face was still devastating the second I laid my eyes on it, and I’d never get over how good he looked in anything he wore. Donning nothing but Hunter attire, Sloan gave the fashionably dressed man nearby a run for his money. I mean, I half expected the two of them to manifest a catwalk nearby and have a full-blown Zoolander inspired model-off. It bore repeating that neither one would look ill-fitted in a high-fashion space.
Not at all.
While Cash gave the impression of it with his clothes and chic look, for Sloan, it was an entire vibe. The dude exuded a celebrity air, and it never failed to shine through on the darkest days.
Guilt should be wreaking havoc on my body and mind, but unfortunately, my elation with Sloan’s unexpected return took front and center.
The Brit took several steps before closing the space between us, and his eyes stayed with me, never finding their way back over to the Dark Fae. Then his luminous gaze dropped to my hand where Phillip’s ring took the place of his. For some odd reason, I wanted to hide my hand away from view. As if that would even work with someone like Sloan.
I was such an idiot .
To my continued dismay, the shame rising into my throat was born out of removing the gift the Brit gave me and not because I’d spent the better part of the prior evening dreaming about Sloan and his silky-soft lips and lust-roughened voice.
My head is all fucked up.
“It is very beautiful,” Sloan muttered softly, something about his guttural voice making my throat quickly seize. “Though, I’d argue not as fitting as the one I gave you.”
Holy hell, shots fired…
Ask anyone and swooning was so 19th century, but it didn’t stop me from falling victim to it the minute the sultry Brit’s statement hit. I barely caught the way Cassius’s lips tilted upwards before Sloan was speaking again.
“I’ve missed you.”
The guilt I’d been waiting for finally showed the fuck up. But sadly, it wasn’t because I’d betrayed Phillip; it was because I didn’t feel guilty about my exhilaration over the heartfelt statement said to me by a man I’d been yearning to see for days.
Déjà vu’s a bitch.
Sloan barely took another step before Phillip appeared out of nowhere, hand holding his friend’s shoulder. “Should I bother asking what the fuck you’re doing here?”
You could cut the tension with a knife, but Cassius didn’t seem to know how to read a goddamn room, because he very loudly bemoaned the partnership like his life had been ruined the second Sloan appeared. “I can’t believe I have to deal with both of you bloody wankers now. What did I do to deserve this?!” Cassius complained loudly, stomping his foot like a toddler having a tantrum.
I couldn’t help it, I laughed out loud, and both of my Hunter companions didn’t manage to keep from smiling in response. But just as quickly, the two went back to silently staring at each other. My eyes flicked from Sloan to Phillip, then back to Sloan before I realized we were here to do a job.
“Find anything?” I asked Phillip, inadvertently hiding the hand with his ring on it.
The Austrian didn’t look over at first, and I almost thought he wouldn’t, but then his light gaze jerked over to where I stood. “If we move now, we’ll catch them before they fully awaken. Piece of cake.” Then his steely eyes were back on Sloan. “Again, why have you come? You were supposed to aid Rose with gathering the Hunters on the list.”
Cash peered quietly between the two Hunters before smirking. “Maybe I won’t need to worry about the lot of you. Seems like you’re plenty caught up in each other.”
Walking a wide circle around the soundlessly quarreling pair, Cassius came to stand beside me, eyes deciphering the quiet struggle taking place on my face. His purple dragon eyes naturally fell to where the bracelet he’d given me was hidden.
“You seem to be collecting a lot of jewelry these days,” he whispered, smirking happily when I glared at him. “It’ll be so very interesting to see which one you favor by the end of this little trip.”
I opened my mouth to lay into him, not sure what I’d say but figuring I’d use that teenage part of my brain to work it out while the words tumbled from my mouth. Unfortunately for me, Cash didn’t wait. He grabbed my hand and dragged me the direction Phillip mentioned the vampire coven was located.
“I’ll be taking this prize with me while you blokes have your little macho-man chat. Toodles!” Cassius called out, instantly barred by the other two when he put a leg out in an almost slap-stick comedy style.
It oddly reminded me of Mr. Bean, and I smiled without intending to. The day had devolved into a ridiculous series of events, so it seemed fitting it’d end with some weirdo Mr. Bean moment.
Granted, if the other two hadn’t stopped Cassius, the Dark Fae would’ve gotten a one-way ticket to Smackdown Town, thanks to yours truly, Vindictive V. I wasn’t the damsel sort. Sure, my head wasn’t exactly on straight these days, but I could handle some cowardly Fae who’d gotten a little too comfortable doing what he wanted.
Except, I’d been quietly desperate for an escape—and Cash appeared to pick up on my silent plea. It was in his eyes as they trailed back over his shoulder to find me, and it was the first time I wondered if maybe there could ever be a future where I forgave the man for all he’d done, much like I had Donna and Phillip.
“Shite. I nearly got away with it too, if not for these bloody kids,” Cassius whined in a baby voice that grated on the nerves.
It wasn’t the perfect Scooby-Doo quote, but the Dark Fae struck me as someone who added his own flair to everything he touched. In this case, a very popular cartoon phrase.
Phillip took a step forward, but it was Sloan who freed my hand from Cash’s loose hold, and the silver-haired imp cooed cutely as if he was watching a romance unfold in a daytime soap .
I tried to ignore how my pulse thrummed when the Brit touched my skin. His hand was so gentle and kind, which was a far-cry from Phillip’s, and it felt illicit to enjoy the sensation at all when my brand-new, sort-of-labeled boyfriend was watching the entire time.
Coming between us, Phillip addressed Sloan as if he hadn’t rudely muscled him out of the way. “I guess we’re stuck with you, so you keep the bloody tosser in check. I’ll handle V.”
I opened my mouth again, ready to defend myself, but it was Sloan’s voice that came to my defense first. “I think she’s plenty capable of taking care of herself, mate.”
Phillip pivoted, and I didn’t see the anger radiate on his face, but it was all there in his back, telling a story about how upset the man was. “You have something to say, Sloan?”
I’d never heard Phil use the tone he presently adopted with Sloan, and I quickly realized the situation wasn’t the usual banter-heavy play the two were prone to doing; this was the real deal. They were about to have an actual fight, so I moved around Phillip and put myself between them.
“Uh, ‘scuzie, but I think we all just need to calm the fuck down and remember what we’re doing here,” I interjected firmly.
Cassius stood, a snack in his hand, and I did a double-take at the Fae in confusion. “Oh, by all means, finish what you were saying, love. It’s been a while since I’ve been this amused.”
At least one of us is having a good time…