Chapter 8 Ciara
Ciara
The ride in Jason’s car was silent and dark. Occasionally, I heard him take a breath, but they weren’t regular or even, almost like his body wasn’t used to doing it. The soft sounds were oddly comforting, though.
His scent was stronger in this enclosed space, and I relaxed without even meaning to. The safety that wrapped around me in his presence was something I needed to guard against. It was unexpected and also unhelpful, given he was trying to negotiate a bad deal for Conri’s pack.
Jason kept his fingers clenched tight on the steering wheel. Now and again, the moonlight glinting through the window illuminated his white knuckles as we left the buildings of New Orleans behind and headed out farther into the Bayou.
The narrow road to the pack lands was unmarked.
Barely visible from the main road, actually, but Jason swung the car to the left, making the turn like he’d been doing it all his life, and he slowed to negotiate the ruts in the surface and the potholes that our collection of old trucks and four-wheel drives usually bounced over without a problem.
As we approached the entrance to my home, the big wooden gates were closed, and a couple of shifters in their human forms were leaning against them. My heart sank as Peter, one of the youngest guards, straightened and walked toward the car.
He had an inflated sense of duty and already had his sights set on Leon’s position when Leon retired or stepped down.
He started to head for Jason’s window, but I opened the door and climbed out, beckoning him toward me. “Hey, Peter.”
He slowed his walk and narrowed his gaze through the windshield, his suspicion acutely on show. “Hi, Ciara.” But he still didn’t look at me.
That was unusual because he was one of the few wolves who was ever cordial with me. He didn’t always manage actual kindness, but he never insulted me—either because he was serious about eventually acquiring Leon’s position or because he was trying to curry Conri’s favor.
The reasons didn’t really matter; the outcome was the same. He treated me with enough respect that he’d let us pass without too many questions.
He continued to look at Jason, his gaze assessing. “Is everything okay?” He still didn’t focus on me, even though it was clear it was me he was speaking to.
“Everything’s fine. The vampire liaison is just giving me a ride home.”
Peter’s nostrils flared, and his gaze filled with disgust as he leaned closer to the car, as if he needed to see Jason better.
“He’s good.” I gave my reassurance, wishing I didn’t believe it quite as strongly as I did, as I climbed back into the car to demonstrate the truth of my words, but Peter didn’t move, and Jason tensed under the guard’s continued scrutiny.
He didn’t move again, his posture entirely still as he focused on Peter. Jason was a predator in that moment, his intensity more visceral than his earlier aggression with Brad.
“Jason?” I spoke his name, but he didn’t react.
“Hey.” I rested my hand on his forearm, and his muscles flexed beneath my touch, but he suddenly looked at me, the motion fluid and graceful.
Almost normal. Except still with that edge of supernatural that I saw so often in the pack—something more than I could manage. More than merely human.
His body relaxed, and something shone in his eyes, something that made my heart race as though there was a connection between us. Just for a split second.
Something I couldn’t understand or capture.
It was gone in a split second, though, and normal Jason looked at me from his eyes. Like nothing had happened.
Except it had. I’d just calmed a vampire who’d looked ready to attack. How the hell was that even possible?
Everything I knew about vampires told me they were ruthless. I knew the damage they could do—and the damage they’d done to the pack, my family, Conri’s family. A vampire in a rage could never be reasoned with. They killed first and didn’t bother to ask any questions later.
Yet Jason was pressing his foot against the gas like nothing unusual had happened.
“You okay?” I asked quietly.
He scoffed quietly in response. “Never better.”
I didn’t need to give him any directions. He’d clearly been here enough times already in his role as vampire liaison, and it showed as he rolled to a smooth stop outside the cabin I shared with Conri.
There were lights still blazing in a couple of the windows, which meant either Conri was up and working…or he was up and waiting for me. I sighed as I unbuckled my seatbelt then reached for my door handle.
But I was too slow. The door opened and Jason stood behind it, like he was secretly a gentleman or something. I looked over at the driver’s seat. Empty. But how?
Damn, I’d forgotten how fast these sneaky fuckers could be.
I grimaced at him instead of smiling, and I climbed out, avoiding the use of his hand, which he held toward me like he had in the nightclub.
I’d ignored it then, too. Part of me screamed to touch him…
and the rest of me sensed that would be a very bad idea indeed.
“Well, goodnight.” His deep voice seemed to burrow under my skin, and I shivered at the way it brushed against me, exposing me, making me raw.
Without warning, he stepped forward, into my space, and I backed up—but my ass hit the car. I had nowhere to go.
“Back off, buddy.” My voice was surprisingly strong, but I’d been in these situations before.
I knew how to deal with unwanted attention. And if things got out of hand, I had a few new moves that Leon had taught me. Jason couldn’t blame me if I tried them out after he didn’t respect my request to step away, right?
My breath caught in my chest as Jason shifted slightly, and I thought he was going to move away, but instead he brushed the back of his forefinger over my cheek then lifted a lock of my hair and tucked it behind my ear. I almost closed my eyes at his touch, but I caught myself just in time.
When I looked at him instead, he was staring at my mouth, and my stomach flipped over. There was a hungriness to his gaze. Did he want to kiss me? I wanted…I leaned closer to him. I wanted… I wasn’t sure what I wanted.
A howl close by broke my trance-like state, and I stepped to the side, out of Jason’s line of sight.
“Okay. Thanks for the ride,” I mumbled. “Goodbye, Jason.” I forced finality in my words as I turned jerkily from him and took uncoordinated steps up to the porch.
Damn. This man shouldn’t affect me this much. This vampire. I couldn’t afford to forget what he was. And I couldn’t turn around. I didn’t want to. Even though it took all of my resolve and my strength not to fucking turn around. I didn’t want to see whether he was watching me walk away.
Hell, I totally wanted to see.
I closed the front door behind me so I wouldn’t see, and I rested my head against the cool wood while I took some deep breaths.
What had that even been? Jason had just brought me home, done the right thing. He’d looked after me and made sure I was safe.
That didn’t make him my savior. He was just a gentleman. Not even a friend.
Simply a guy being good.
And probably only because it benefited him.
I didn’t owe him anything now. Not my attention and certainly not anything bordering on affection.
But my heart beat fast, and my breath came in more rapid inhales than usual.
Conri turned away from the window as I entered our big living room, the overstuffed sofas more comfortable than pretty or elegant. But they were perfect for a man Conri’s size when he wanted to relax.
Maybe even a man Jason’s size.
I dragged my mind back from the vampire. He had no business being in my thoughts.
“What the hell were you with him for?” My brother’s voice was tight and angry.
Yes. Yes, my question precisely. I huffed a laugh. “I’ve been asking myself the exact same thing.”
“I’m serious, Ciara.” His voice was full of grit and steel, and I looked at him.
“Am I talking to my brother or my pack alpha?”
“Ciara.”
Pack alpha it was then. “He just brought me home when Taylor found a better offer to get a ride with, that’s all.” Suddenly, I sounded preteen again, explaining myself and trying to defend my illogical actions.
Only I hadn’t been illogical. I’d been safe.
“Next time.” Conri’s voice was still tight and angry. “Next time, call me.”
I rolled my eyes. “Hell, yeah. Why didn’t I think of that?” I slapped my fore head. “Well, duh. Every girl wants her big brother to come get her from a nightclub.”
“Ciara.” He sounded tired now.
“No, you know what? Just can it, Conri. I’m home and I’m safe. Jason brought me home. He made sure I was safe.” I stopped and whirled away, not even sure why I was defending a vampire now. “I’m going to bed.”
I stomped up the stairs, my purse bouncing against my side with every step I took. Damn Conri, being so overprotective as usual. I closed the door of my room behind me and sighed.
Holy hell. I hoped Taylor was having a better night than I was. At least she wouldn’t arrive home to a man who couldn’t decide whether he was an angry pack alpha or an angry brother, anyway.
I dropped my purse in the corner of my room and pushed my hair over my shoulder. I just needed a quick shower then bed. I could sleep all night and have a better day tomorrow. A better day would be any day of the week without Jason Martin in it.
I stripped my clothes off, leaving each item littering the floor as I walked toward my tiny private bathroom. I’d pick up after myself in the morning.
The air in the bathroom was cold, and I shivered as I stood butt naked, waiting for the water to warm up before I stepped beneath the spray.
The water beat down on me and I hung my head, letting it drip from my hair and form big beads that rolled down my shoulders and over my nipples.
I worked my jasmine-scented shower gel into a lather between my palms and smoothed it over my body, closing my eyes as I recalled the intensity of Jason’s gaze on me earlier.
I imagined him watching me now as I ran my hands over my breasts. They prickled beneath my touch, and I caught my breath as my nipples hardened. I touched them again, deliberately slowing and passing my palm over them.
Hell, I wanted someone else’s hands on me. A man’s hands. Jason’s hands.
The realization took me by surprise, but it didn’t stop me touching myself. What would he do to me? Where would he allow his hands to linger?
Where did I want him to touch?
My lips almost itched for the soft pressure of a kiss, the taste of a tongue, and I sighed as I ran one of my hands down my abdomen and touched the inside of my thigh. My breath caught as I teased myself, trailing my fingers upward.
I couldn’t think about that man while I stood in my shower. Shouldn’t. I didn’t really want him to touch me. Why would I?
But I did.
I teased myself more, releasing fast breaths as I moved closer to my center and away again, my clit pulsing in anticipation now. When I finally stroked my finger over the top of it, I moaned softly.
Sweet Jesus. How long had it been since the last time? Only the softest of touches were necessary. Gentle, constant motion, and I closed my eyes and imagined my fingers belonged to someone else, someone whose breathing joined with mine, encouraging me onward, driving me forward.
As I worked one hand between my legs, I worked my other fingertips over my sensitive nipples. Stroking them, strumming them, and in the wet heat of the shower, I imagined his mouth. He’d suck gently on one then the other.
My lips parted, and I whispered my want, inhaling an audible breath as excitement burned hot between my legs. My body moved without thought, meeting the movement of my fingers, finding friction there as I stoked the fire inside me.
I pressed a little firmer, but not too hard. Just enough not to lose that one spot that felt so good as I rolled it gently. The motion was perfect, tightening every muscle as I lost sense of my surroundings, chasing only sensation.
And close…so close… Jason could bring me this close to release. His name echoed through my head. Only his name. I had no other thoughts that made sense. Half-whispered pleas for release surrounded me as I fought to remain upright.
I moved my finger down, just barely pressing inside myself, playing where I was wettest before returning to my most sensitive spot and circling again, losing count as I moved between dipping inside and back to rolling. Again and again.
Longing for more.
I was nearly…I pinched one of my nipples as I increased the speed of my finger and all thought was gone, removed from my head by a release of tension, and I floated, not even breathing as my body pulsed and clenched, relaxing in waves of sensation that made all other feeling impossible.
As the waves ebbed, I slowed my touches. I could have chased another one, and often had, but I hadn’t even meant to find this orgasm, alone in my shower, imagining the touch of a forbidden man. Hopefully, this one time was enough.
Hopefully, he wouldn’t visit my head again.
He certainly wasn’t welcome.
Except what if he could make me feel like that for real?
I shivered although heat clung to my skin. I was in trouble.