CHAPTER TWELVE
I’M NOT SURE YET IF it’s better having my memories back.
On one hand, I can remember their faces and all the amazing memories from childhood before the winter solstice disaster.
I remember the four males who I grew up with and who became my closest companions.
Seeing how everything was then and witnessing the downfall of my kingdom…
a part of me wishes the magick necklace that manipulated my mind, to hide everything from me, was still there.
Yet now that I know, I know I need to fix it.
The full conversation of the night my mother made me flee with Gretchen rings loudly in my mind.
My momma thrusts me at her handmaiden as we stride hastily to the stables. “Please Gretchen, get her out of here. Protect her with your life,” she whispers frantically. “Go as far away as you can and don’t tell me where you plan on going,” she hisses. “Follow what we’ve talked about.”
Gretchen stiffly nods her head, and even though her hands are steady, the smell of fear seeping through the air is pungent.
“Of course, your Highness. I know what to do—she’ll be safe with me.
I swear it on my life. I will tell her of the plans when she’s old enough to understand.
I’ll keep in contact with Amethyst, and when it’s safe, we will bring her home. ”
My heart aches as the next words leave my momma’s mouth.
“When you come back, dear Jewel, your fathers and I won’t be here.
I promise you’ll see me again in the afterlife with our ancestors when it’s your turn to leave here.
” Her knees crack against the stone of the stable floor as she collapses to the ground, pulling me towards her.
“Go with Gretchen and listen to everything she asks of you. Be strong, my Jewel.” She tucks my necklace into my tunic and taps it tenderly, a spark of her magick seeping into it, making it warm and I feel a powerful magick slide over my mind.
“Don’t lose this, okay? It’s important you wear it at all times—do you understand?
You won’t be able to take it off until Amethyst gives you the okay.
Everything will make sense then, I swear,” she whispers frantically as she searches my face.
Wiping the tears from my cheeks with the back of my hand, I give her a tight, jerky nod. “I won’t take it off momma, but I don’t want to leave. Why can’t I stay here with you and my fathers? Why won’t I ever see you again?”
She pulls my cloak tightly around me, settling the hood upon my head, and drags me in for a bone-crushing hug.
“I will always be with you here.” She places her hand over my thudding heart.
“Don’t forget who you are, my darling, but you can’t tell anyone until it’s safe—promise me.
” She waits until I give her my promise before she continues.
“Gretchen will instruct you more later, so don’t be bossing her into trying to tell you sooner.
Be patient my sweet darling. Just remember that your fathers and I love you, so very much.
You are our heart, Maeven. Now go.” She rises gracefully and ushers Gretchen and me towards a horse the color of night.
Once Gretchen is seated in the saddle, my momma hoists me off the ground and into her handmaiden’s lap before backing up with tears streaming down her face.
My hand stretches out to her. “Momma!”
Dust shimmers, falling from the stable ceiling, and I feel it before I hear it: an explosion sounds in the distance and we glance towards the noise in horror. My throat thickens and blood pounds in my ears.
“Go!” my mother bellows as she summons water to her hands.
Gretchen spurs the horse into a gallop and steers us swiftly out of the stable.
I wipe the tears from my face. She never made me promise to stay away forever. If Gretchen had lived, I could have been here, fighting to avenge my parents. That’s another thing, my males—no, not my males. We barely know each other anymore. But did they know what was going to happen that night?
My fingers thread through my tresses as I bury my face into my knees as another muffled sob leaves me.
What else was kept from me? The vague memory of the stone flashes in my mind’s eye and I gasp, remembering why it’s so dangerous.
I need to speak with Amethyst. We need to retrieve it and destroy it.
Nero pecks at my mental barriers and I let him in as I nearly faceplant off the bed in a rush. “Are you okay? I felt an abrupt change in your emotions. Are you going to do something reckless? Can I join? Pretty please let me join.”
A smile tugs at my lips with Nero’s eagerness. “No? Maybe? I need to talk to Amethyst about what we saw under Phixmery. I know what it is, and it’s not good for anyone. I remember my parents telling me cautionary tales about it—”
Impatient knocking sounds at my door, and somehow I just know it’s Jesper on the other side. It’s like my body can sense him, but that’s just weird. Storming over to the door, I rip it open as he goes to knock again. “Can I help you?” I ask.
Nero’s wings ruffle on my shoulder but he stays quiet, although his curiosity seeps through our bond as I feel his gaze bounces between us.
Jesper grins, his whole face lighting up, making his mismatched eyes glow. Yet another thing that has changed, and I almost forget my task instead wanting to ask him what the void happened, to run my finger over the puckered silver scar that runs through his eye.
“I was coming to get you. Did you think that just because we aren’t at Phixmery anymore you won’t have training? You also need to learn to care for your dragon. And don’t worry, your friends will be joining us too.”
My brain scrambles for a moment. “Training?” I say slowly.
My head shakes as if to pull myself together.
“Sure, but I really need to talk to Amethyst. It’s important.
So I will meet you… Where am I meeting you?
” I ask. There’s a few places we could train and he mentioned something about caring for Vasari, who has been nearby with the other dragons in a giant fae-made Keep for them.
She loves it, it’s heated and clean. It’s practically an enormous horse stable where our beasts can come and go as they please.
His grin grows wider as he takes a step towards me. “Not to worry. I’ll escort you. I wanted to check in on you anyway. Aemon wanted to do it, but I figured you’d rather see my handsome face.” He winks.
My cheeks heat and I narrow my eyes. “What if I’d rather see Aemon’s or even Kill’s face? Hmm?” I state, pushing past him and heading towards Aemon’s mother’s quarters.
He catches up to me easily with his much longer strides.
“You know, Amethyst isn’t even here right now,” he announces casually when we’re almost at our destination.
I whirl on him. “What? No. Why? Where did she go and why in the fates didn’t you say anything?” Shit. My fingers run through my hair as I turn away from Jesper.
“Maybe she went into town and she’ll be back later,” Nero supplies.
A deep sigh leaves my lips. “You’re right. But I need to ask what she knows about the stone. Because if it gets into the wrong hands, it won’t be good for anyone. Especially because they know a royal dragon has chosen someone again.”
A throat clears from behind me. “Something came up and she won’t be back for a few weeks.
As for not telling you…” He places a finger under my chin and lifts my head towards his.
“Maybe I just wanted to take a walk with you before having to share you with the others.” His eyes trace my face before he boops me on the nose.
“Come on! Dragons tend not to have much patience and I’m sure Tisur has already informed the rest of our beasts that we’re delaying spending time with them.
My eyebrows draw together. Tisur? Oh, that must be his dragon.
It’s then that Vasari finally graces me with her presence. “Yes, and one of my mates. Now hurry, we have much to talk about and I’m afraid I have some pink, meaty creature stuck in my teeth that I could use some help getting out.”
JESPER THANKFULLY LEAVES me to my thoughts on the way over to the Dragon’s Keep.
I’m trying to push the thoughts of what’s hidden under Phixmery to the back of my mind, as it won’t do anything to worry about what I can’t change at this moment.
I’ll just need to hope that it stays that way until we can go retrieve it.
The problem is, it can’t be me that does it; if I react to it like last time, then I won’t be of any help to anyone.
When we almost arrive, Jesper breaks the silence. “Do you remember that time where we snuck into the kitchen and replaced all the salt vials with sugar?”
The memory comes flashing to the forefront of my mind and I let out a laugh. “Yeah, we spent the next week hiding from the kitchen staff because all the meat they seasoned turned sweet.”
“Your Szellemi father thought it was hilarious, the others not so much… I’ve missed you more than anything, Ravina. The others and I haven’t been the same since we thought you died.”
My arms wrap around my midsection and Nero nuzzles my cheek. “Maeven did die, Jesp. I’m not the female you remember. Not anymore. Let’s just train, okay?”
I don’t wait for his response and head towards the towering dark log and stone building, with doors so wide it can easily fit two large dragons.
It makes me feel like an ant. Jesper’s footsteps sound from behind me, and to be honest I don’t know why I keep pushing him away.
I do know that until I sort out my mind with all these new memories, I can’t let things go further.
Once I figure out what I’m doing then maybe him and I can take that step.
The only thing I know right now is that my new goal is to get revenge for my parents, for my childhood that was ripped away from me.
For the males that were torn from my life.
Maybe I’m being childish with my reactions, maybe I’m not.
But I’m feeling volatile and needing an outlet.
Maybe Ember will spar with me? There’s nothing like challenging a Vopn Fo to get your blood boiling.
They’re always itching for a fight. But first, I need to learn how to care for Vasari, something I suppose I would have learned if Phixmery was a safe place for us to be—but we will have to make do with what we got.
“Rav!” Roz yells as he prances over to me, scooping me off the ground and spinning before placing me on the ground. “It’s good to see you come out of hiding. This place is amazing and Thornwing really seems to enjoy it. Although, he could do without being a fifth wheel.”
I glance up at him quizzically, “Fifth wheel?”
Ember, Mel, and Lennox make it over to us as he says, “Wait, your dragon hasn’t told you she’s mated to the mini Lords’ dragons?”
Spinning slowly towards the alcove where Vasari is resting, I raise my brow at her. “No, I think she has conveniently left that part out. Is that why you’ve been ignoring me? You decided to take them as your males?”
Her long neck stretches up as she peers down at me. “I did not choose anything, Lost One. The fates gifted these males to me as is my right as Queen. Just as it’s your right to claim the males the fates gifted to you. Things are starting to return to balance, as they should.”
I sense nothing but the truth and surety of her words. “Nero, did you know?”
He shrugs. “I had my suspicions, but the overgrown lizard is really good with keeping her mind separate from me.”
My shoulders droop in defeat. “Well, congratulations on your mating. I just wish it didn’t have to be them. Also, I don’t have any fate-gifted males. I think I would know.”
Jesper snickers from behind me, but I ignore him.
Vasari raises her scaled brow, and snorts a puff of smoke.
“I think you are very wrong, Lost One. Deep down you know who they are, but then again, you are lost, and until you find yourself I don’t think you’re going to be very accepting of them.
Poor males. Now, if you don’t mind, this tendon is stuck really well and I don’t have a tooth-rock here to be able to free it myself.
” She opens her maw wide and I nearly collapse from the rotting smell.
“Don’t be dramatic, my breath smells much more pleasant than others’,” she teases.
Roz comes over and hands me a long, thin silver spike. “Thornwing let me do it and it was fine, just try not to breathe.” He winces, moving out of the blast zone.
Meanwhile Ember and Mel are trying to stifle their gagging.
“Well, here goes nothing,” I murmur while practically climbing into Vasari’s mouth, avoiding her long, needle-like teeth.
“Be careful not to jab her gum or tongue—I don’t think she’ll be very forgiving if you do,” Jesper adds from behind me. Then I hear him add gleefully, “Alright Stoll, Amos, and Adair, go tend to your beasties, and when you’re done, we’re hitting the training yard.”
Everyone else scampers away and I’m left in Vasari’s mouth, gently trying to pry this white, rotting chunk of gristle out.
Nero flutters his feathers on his perch well outside the stink zone. “Damorleia to Ravina: unhinged, red-headed male is staring at your ass,” he states, making me slip and fall onto her tongue. He caws and chuffs in amusement.
I’m so going to need a bath after this.