CHAPTER FIFTEEN
THE STACK OF PAPERWORK SEEMS never-ending, but that’s because I haven’t been paying any mind to it.
My undivided attention has been on Ravina, who I’ve been avoiding.
It’s not that I don’t want to spend time with her.
I do. Fates, I spend enough time skulking in the shadows watching her when she’s sleeping.
Although the others are right. She’s not ready to know about us as her mates, so it’s best I distance myself.
The world is already crashing down around her.
It shows in her dreams, the palpable grief at remembering her loss due to that damn pendant hiding her memories and keeping her identity hidden.
I eye the necklace that’s sitting on my desk. I should give it back to her, but I can’t. My hand scrubs my face before running my fingers through my hair. I’m holding a damn grudge over an inanimate object, yet I can’t seem to destroy the thing either.
Jesper comes bursting into my office with horror etched into his face. His hair is wild and wind-torn, like he’s run his hands through it countless times. His wide, manic eyes land on me and he swallows. “I fucked up. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!”
My hate for the necklace is temporarily forgotten as I stash it in the drawer of my desk. “What happened?” I nearly growl, wondering what kind of shitstorm he’s caused this time.
He begins pacing, pulling on his scarlet strands. “She knows.”
The blood in my veins freeze. “Knows what, Jesper? Spit it out!” My favorite leather chair glides back as I rise up from my desk and I shadow-blink over to him, pinning him to the wall. “What in the fucking fates did you do?”
He doesn’t try to fight me off which only serves to tell me how upset he is about whatever he just did.
“We were getting closer and things happened and then she saw my mark, and realized she has one that kind of matches mine, and she asked, so I told her, and she panicked and ran. She knows that we are her mates,” he reiterates.
“Where did she go?” I snap, there’s this urge that’s building in me to find her, to make sure she’s safe even if she doesn’t want to talk to us right now.
I know her. Whenever she was upset she would take off, hiding in the stable with the horses.
She was too young to ride alone then, but now that she’s older…
He swallows again and curses as he comes to the same conclusion as me. He rips himself out of my grasp and runs out of my office.
I pull my shadows around me, sinking into their comfort before pulling myself towards the stables.
When I appear, all the horses are here and there’s not a Ravina in sight.
Fuck. My eyes widen as the answer comes to me, and a roar of a dragon shakes the ground.
It takes me less than a second to blink into the shadows outside, and Vasari’s magnificent deep purple scales are all but a speck in the sky as she takes off east.
“Evisdor, did Ravina and Vasari just leave the premises?” I reach out to my beast and he lets me in, feeling the panic rising through our bond.
His rich voice travels back to me. “They needed to have a talk, and there’s nothing better than bonding with your dragon in the skies. The Lost One is ready to hear what my mate and Queen has to say now. They will be back.”
“We’re going after them. I won’t leave her without protection. We’re in the middle of a fates-damned war, for fuck’s sake,” I shoot back as I use the shadows to travel to the Keep where Evisdor, Tisur, Voissor and her friend’s dragon—Thornwing—are lounging.
“There’s no need. They will not go far, but if you must mother-hen your mate, I suppose I could stretch my wings,” he states.
“But do not blame me if they want to roast your over-protective arse. Our females are strong, and it’s time you see your mate as the Queen she is and stop hiding in your shadows, hatchling. ”
I ignore his hatchling comment. “My mate is strong, but she’s still learning.
She’s grieving what was taken from her and is clearly not thinking straight.
There could be enemy riders coming in from over the mountains and the two of them could be hurt, or worse.
” Since the display at Phixmery, riders from there have gotten brave entering into my territory.
I’m assuming from my spies that they’ve been given orders to find the rider with the royal dragon.
She needs to be close to me—I won’t lose her again.
I can’t. I don’t think I’d survive going through what I did the past twenty-one years without her.
I thought I was keeping her safe and look what happened.
A growl nearly rattles in my chest as I climb atop of Evisdor and leave the Keep. The sinking urge to get my eyes on her grows. She can be mad that we hadn’t told her yet all she wants, but I will be keeping watch over her while she has this talk with her dragon.
Evisdor spreads his wings before pushing off the ground at top speed, my urgency pushing at him.
“I’ve told my mate that you’re following and the Lost One apparently isn’t too happy about that,” he tells me smugly.
“You’re supposed to be on my team here,” I mumble, half annoyed.
“We may have our life-bond, but she is my mate and she comes first. Which is why I understand why you want to watch yours, even though you do not trust her yet.”
“I trust her! She just doesn’t know what she’s doing yet. She could be taken from me, from us.”
His body rumbles beneath me. “Which I understand, hatchling. I am merely giving you advice. Females don’t like being told what to do; they’re fierce creatures.
Your female might decide to take your balls.
It will be humiliating to have a ball-less rider but, alas, you’re stubborn.
Let’s hope she is merciful and lets you keep them. ”
Said balls retract and I shiver. She can stab me all she wants, but not my balls; then again, the sight of her angry causes my cock to stir and I shake my head. I need to focus on getting to her.
Evisdor is flying at top speeds, because Vasari is as well.
Being a royal dragon, she is the equivalent of Gallalaus fae.
They hold each of the types of powers of their other colored counterparts, which is why she’s able to fly as fast as white dragons.
She has each type of dragon breath: fire, water, shadowflame and hallucinogenic gas.
Not to mention the stealth that comes from black dragons, the strength of blue and the tactical minds of the red dragons.
We fly for hours and a knot begins to build in the pit of my stomach.
Where the void are they going? They seem to have circled, heading back south along the Barkdurnt Forest which makes my nerves grate.
I thought she would have at least headed toward our field but she hasn’t, veering south towards the ocean instead.
This is closer to the Imperset border than I’d like.
We fly for a bit longer and I nearly fall off Evisdor with relief when I notice them on the beach in the distance, watching the waters.
We land nearby and, using my dragon’s shadows, I blink off him before heading over toward them, using the short distance to walk off some of my frazzled nerves.
I know she knows that we’re here, but she hasn’t glanced over at us.
“Mind your balls,” Evisdor reminds me unhelpfully.
I reach her and whisper her name but all she does is turn her head away from me. Vasari growls and I hold my hands up to her. “She may be your rider, but she’s my mate. I respect you, your highness, but this is between us,” I tell her firmly.
Her gaze narrows on me but after a moment she huffs, blowing a curtain of smoke in my face before wandering over to Evisdor.
“Oh, so now you want to tell me that I’m your mate, huh?” she snaps, turning her red-rimmed eyes on me.
My head cocks to the side as the muscles in my jaw tighten. “We didn’t tell you because you had enough on your plate. Your world was just turned upside-down again, and we were giving you a chance to acclimate. We also wanted to wait for Talyn to be here as well.”
Her arms cross and her gaze narrows. “Oh so we’re playing the ‘Let’s protect the poor little female from her own emotions’ card, are we?
You’re lucky Nero’s not here or I might let him take an eye.
It’s not up to you to decide what I can and cannot handle.
This is my life too!” Her voice rises with the heat of her anger.
“You’re right. Maybe we could have handled it better. But you were barely trusting of us when I rescued you from Phixmery. Need I remind you that you stabbed me? Would you have really trusted anything we told you without your memories?” I ask her gently.
She blows out a slow breath. “I don’t know.
How would I know if you didn’t tell me? Shouldn’t mates be equal?
Don’t treat me like I’m less deserving of what’s happening.
I’ve been through more than you know. I can handle what you have to tell me.
Even if I need to get away for a bit to think without all the testosterone that seems to be hanging around. ” Her gaze stays narrowed on me.
I lean down so she can see how serious I am.
“Do you even know where you are right now? On the other side of those mountains is enemy territory. Since we escaped Phixmery, more and more riders are coming. Looking for you. If you think for one second I wasn’t going to follow you to the ends of this realm to keep you safe, then you’re mistaken.
I’ve failed you once by not getting you from that backwater village sooner.
I’m glad I burnt that fucking place to the ground.
I would do anything to keep you from being hurt again, Ravina.
Do I make myself clear? Or would you like me to raze more of your enemies until you get the picture? ”
She gasps, her brilliant blue eyes widening. “You did what to Shalo? There were kids there… families!”
I rest my hand on the pommel of my sword, taking steps towards her until she backs into the rocky wall of the cliff.
“The kids and mothers went free, and the damn so-called leader escaped, but the rest? Those males who watched as they hurt you over and over again? They didn’t deserve to live.
You’ve always been mine to protect, and when I realized those dreams weren’t just fears but memories…
I would burn the world for you, my mate—my Queen.
I will slaughter, torture and scheme to keep you safe.
We grew up together, and I knew you were always special to me.
” I lift her chin before using the shadows of the cliff to wrap around her neck.
“I just didn’t know how special until that bond clicked into place, tying me to you for all eternity. ”
Her breaths come in short pants as she traces my face, her lips parting and her eyes lit up with need and confusion. I pull away, letting the shadows return. I won’t touch her until that confusion is gone. I want her begging for my touch.
She gathers herself and locks down her emotions.
“I’m not a queen. All of you really need to stop fucking saying that.
I’m still frustrated with you four, but I understand.
Just give me some time to wrap my head around this, please.
” She scratches the side of her neck. “We should probably head back, it’s going to be dark soon. ”
I shake my head. “We won’t be going back to Kraryn tonight.
We’ll head to Cellis and stay at the inn.
You’ve been flying most of the day, without a proper saddle.
You’re probably sore. Come, you’ll ride with me so I can make sure you don’t fall.
” It may be selfish of me, but I just want her wrapped in my arms. Staying away from her was the hardest thing I’ve done, and now that she knows, I just want her smothered in my shadows with me.
She laughs dryly. “No. I’ll be fine riding to Cellis. And if we’re staying at an inn, I want my own room,” she states like there’s no argument.
I smile, a plan forming in my mind. “Of course,” I lie.
She’s not leaving my sight, even if I need to sleep on the floor.