65. Tessa
65
Tessa
T he kids are asleep, and the apartment is quiet. Kade's using the weights he and the guys set up in one of the empty rooms and I'm channel surfing. Only I have zero interest in watching anything. I tried picking up my latest book, but after reading the same paragraph five times, I gave up.
Cin has messaged me a few times but he must be working now because my last reply to him is still unread. Madden never messages. He's not exactly chatty in person, so it doesn't surprise me he's not much of a communicator via phone.
In the past, this would have annoyed the hell out of me, but for some reason, it doesn't with him. Maybe it's because Cin is the exact opposite. I've had more messages from him in 24 hours than I had from Enzo during our entire relationship.
Which says it all, really.
I scroll through Netflix and finally settle on Dead to Me. Stella recommended it ages ago and said I'd love it. Twenty minutes in and I have to admit, she's right. Just as I'm finally letting go of some of the tension that's plagued me since Kade and I kissed, the man himself appears.
He wanders through the living area, shirtless, his skin damp with sweat. Honestly, the thought of a sweaty man should be repellent - Enzo was never exactly fragrant after returning from a run - but repelled is the last thing I'm feeling right now.
Horny is more like it. I want to climb that man like a tree. What the fuck is wrong with me? Cin and Madden are more than enough for any woman.
The coffee machine burbles and a few minutes later, Kade stands next to the sofa with an espresso in one hand.
"Kinda late for coffee?" I point out, no longer watching the screen.
He hums noncommittally. OK, then . So he doesn't want to talk. Fine.
An awkward silence falls between us while I pretend to be engrossed in my show. Why isn't he leaving? The longer he remains, torturing me with pheromones, the more my blood boils.
"Is there something you need to tell me?" I ask eventually.
"Tessa, I..." His voice trails off. Does he regret the kiss? It sure feels like it. I bet he's trying to come up with a socially acceptable way to tell me he made a mistake. That we can't be more than acquaintances.
"It's OK." My voice has zero inflection. "You don't need to say it."
Although I'm not looking at him, I can sense the tension simmering between us. Tension that's been building for a while now.
"Say what, Tessa?"
"That you didn't mean to kiss me. It's fine. I'm a big girl. I know you were only trying to make me feel better."
"You think it was a pity kiss?" Kade's voice grates, like he's annoyed, so I chance a quick backward glance.
Big mistake.
The coffee cup is on the table, and he has his arms folded across his chest, showcasing all his delicious muscles. My eyes track a small bead of moisture as it slides down his pecs, heading toward the happy trail that leads into his shorts.
Shorts that hang perilously low on his hips.
The man looks like my next big mistake.
I drag my gaze away and try to focus on the show playing, not wanting to get into a conversation with him, but it's hopeless.
"For the record," he continues when I don't say a word, "It wasn't a pity kiss. I've wanted to kiss you since the night I picked up you and the kids up from the rest stop. But I did nothing about it because of who we are."
"And who are we, Kade?" I'm not sure I know who I am anymore. I thought I was a girlfriend of a man who gave a damn. But Enzo was living a different reality. The last few years, I've barely kept my head above water. Floating along like driftwood, following the current rather than navigating my own path.
He curses softly under his breath. "I am the man your father trusts enough to protect his precious daughter. He would not be happy if he knew how many times I've fucked my hand thinking about you, or how often I've imagined peeling your clothes off before I fuck you so hard you can't walk for days."
My mouth falls open. This was not what I expected him to say.
"Are you always this romantic?" An awkward laugh tumbles from my lips.
"You want romance, kitten?" He smirks and once again, I lose concentration.
"No," I admit after a few moments.
"Good, because I've waited too long and I can't wait any longer."
Before I can second-guess what I'm about to do and remind him in a situationship with his brother and friend, he pulls me to my feet and his mouth is on me again.
Our last kiss was sweet, almost tentative. It felt like Kade was testing the water. Making sure I was comfortable. This kiss is nothing like that one.
His mouth is hard and unyielding, just like the rest of him. This is when I ought to push him away. Instead, I melt like ice cream in the heat. My body wants his and even if this is a mistake, one we'll both live to regret, I don't honestly give a flying fuck.
Kade smells of clean sweat and citrus. He lifts me so my legs are around his waist and carries me through to his bedroom.
It's is the first time I've set foot in his room. Like the other bedrooms in the apartment, it's fairly bland, and he's done nothing to personalize the space other than keep a couple of novels on the nightstand. But I'm not looking at the decor or wondering whether the mattress is firm.
All of my concentration is centered on the way he drops me on the bed and slowly peels my thin cotton pants off. I don't object when he pulls my top off either, so I'm left lying on my back wearing nothing but a tiny red thong.
"Beautiful," he breathes, almost reverently.
My inner critic, the one who loves to shit-talk me, scoffs and reminds me I'm overweight, my stomach is round, and my tits fall to the side now they are bigger. But I ignore that bitch.
Kade doesn't care about any of that. All he sees is a woman who wants him. And I know he wants me because the hard dick tenting the front of his shorts is irrefutable evidence of his desire for my post-partum body.
He pushes my legs apart and settles between my thighs. I'm embarrassingly wet and the thought of him seeing a wet patch on the gusset of my thong makes my cheeks turn almost as red as my hair. It's ridiculous, really. I'm a grown-ass woman. Hell, it wasn't that long ago I had a threesome with Cin and Madden.
Yet with them it's different. Madden takes control and Cin has more than enough confidence for the both of us. I don't know Kade nearly as well. We've danced around each other for weeks, but I'm not sure what he really thinks of me. Aside from the fact he wants to fuck me.
For all I know, I'm a temporary stand-in for Candy the Stripper.
"Hey, where have you gone?" Kade's soft voice pulls me out of my head and I focus on him again. He moves over my body and hovers above me, resting his weight on his forearms. I've always had a weakness for arms. Big biceps and corded forearms are like catnip to me. Needless to say, Kade ticks those boxes.
He cups my jaw and then kisses me. Light at first, then harder, more demanding. I can feel him between my thighs, resting against my clit. My body wants more than a kiss. I want to feel him inside me.
"Kade, please," I moan, but he ignores my plea.
"I'm not rushing this," he says as he nibbles a path down my neck. When he reaches my breasts, I almost fly off the bed. Even though I'm not feeding Chloe much anymore, my breasts are still much larger than they used to be. Kade pushes them together and latches on, sucking and licking both nipples.
Just as I'm on the verge of coming, he pulls back and crawls down the bed until his face is between my thighs. He pushes my thong aside and licks me.
"God!" It's too much. I'm so close! But he uses his weight to lock my thighs in place as he licks, sucks, and teases my clit with his teeth. The pressure builds and then I'm soaring, lost in pleasure.