Chapter 32
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
CALEB
“I’ll put another camera up when she falls asleep,” I decide chipperly as I fire up the app that is linked to the other cameras. What idiots would only put up one camera? I’m hurt she thought we were that sloppy in our bid to watch her every move.
“Do we tell her we can see her in there?” Coop asks, and it earns him a deserved slap around the back of his head. “What the fuck was that for, Cal?”
I present him with the image of Ebony on the screen in just her underwear as she pulls my t-shirt up over her head and hangs it on the back of the door, her fingers lingering for a second longer on the fabric as she appears to ponder something.
“That is easily the most idiotic question you have ever asked me; if I had my knife on me, you would be pulling it from your hip right about now.”
He nods his head in agreement and gets comfortable to watch the show.
She should be gloriously naked always.
I see Cooper perusing her shelves and picking up what he finds on her vanity table.
He strokes the matted balding toy horse that sits beside her box of worldly treasures, a photo of the three of us resting on top as though she had been looking at it recently.
The horse had been white once, the barely-there strawberry insignia on its hind with our initials below it tugging a memory to the forefront of my mind.
Her eighth birthday, the day we gave it to her.
We wrapped it up in old newspaper and presented her with it, pulling out the plate from behind my back with her slice of strawberry shortcake from Mama Dot’s diner.
Eight stolen candles lit on top, ready for her to blow out and make her wish.
Every penny we ever earned for our time working the neighbour’s farms went to our father; Cooper and I had collected cans and traded them in to surprise her for her birthday, and the smile that warmed her beautiful elfin face was worth every minute of every trek down the Hells Haven back roads.
My little trip down memory lane is cut short when I hear the shower running through the door and Ebony’s hushed voice filtering in through our earbuds as she gazes at her reflection in the mirror on my phone screen.
She’s having a conversation with her reflection as though there are two of her in there.
“You will not fold, Ebony. You are stronger than this. Yes, you want their dicks, but today is not the day.” She glances down in the mirror at where the cotton panties cover her.
Tugging on the waistband, her eyes leave the mirror.
“Down, girl, we’re behaving,” she cautions her pussy, and I slap my hand over Cooper’s mouth before the wild hearty chuckle can escape.
His smile is infectious as we watch our girl give her pussy a good telling off.
“You know dick before dinner doesn’t sound like the worst idea.”
“Quieten down, trollop—let’s deal with one shameful secret at a time. Life’s too short to bulk-buy trauma.”
“Admit you liked it, and I’ll shut up.”
“I liked it—okay?” she berates her reflection, throwing up her arms.
“Admit you love them, and I’ll leave it there.”
“That doesn’t sound much like shutting up.
” After a moment of silence, she trails her fingers over the tattoo we gave her, and says softly - the heartbreak evident in each syllable - “I have more love for them than I know what to do with. So much so that everything in me hurts to admit it.” She shudders, removing her underwear and hopping in the shower.
The mumbling beat of a Paramore song emanating from her lips as she begins to sing along to the song playing in her head.
The anger boils over as her words cut me bone deep. I shut off the camera we hid in the air vent in her bathroom and throw my phone down onto her bed.
“I was enjoying that.”
“Her words mean nothing. She left us to rot. What makes you think any of that was true?”
“I don’t know whether you were just present for the same conversation, but she seemed pretty fucking genuine, Cal.”
“Yeah, I thought that too the last time she told us she loved us. Don’t be a fool, Coop.”
“You won’t ruin this for me, for us.”
“We were here to teach her a lesson, to make her pay.”
“That might have been why we were here in the beginning, but it’s different now. Pig-headed might be the personality trait you’re choosing to embody right now, but you need to look through the anger. She wants us, she’s always wanted us. I’m not willing to give that up.”
I don’t voice the response that latches itself to my throat, like a constricting vice grip as I struggle to inhale.
I’ve been so consumed with the hate that I feel, I don’t know if there is any room for love.
EBONY
I return to my bedroom, relieved that they hadn’t left.
If I didn’t pour out my heart to them now, there would never be a right time.
Coop waits patiently on the end of my bed, ready to listen, Caleb is a big ball of pent up rage so I don’t chastise him for wearing a hole in my rug as he paces.
The softly softly approach has never worked with these men so I get right to it.
“I had two options that day. I either let you get taken by Detective Silas, knowing what he wanted to do to you both, let alone what he would do after he found out you helped murder his brother. Or I could make a call and ensure that the police who didn’t hold a grudge against you would come and take you in.
I couldn’t….I wouldn’t….” I fumble with the words as they stick in my throat, realising no words seem big enough to explain away my reasoning.
I take in a sharp steadying breath and will the tears filling my eyes to relent.
“I had a decision to make and very little time to make it. I don’t think you’ll ever know how truly sorry I am. ”
The apology feels thick and grainy on my tongue.
It’s so long overdue, but the mess of emotions from that day, from the days after when the gossip around town that the boys would be charged to the highest degree had begun to fester, I knew they likely wouldn’t want to hear what I had to say.
It was my fault they were branded callous murderers.
But everything they did, they did it to save me. I never forgot that.
The tears fall, my limp wet hair trailing forward over my shoulder and dripping onto the rug beneath my feet.
I grip onto the towel wrapped around me, the chill bouncing between us cutting down bone deep as I shake.
A bitter cold engulfing me as I look up into Caleb’s eyes, trying to find my place there.
Without a word, Caleb lifts me and carries me to my bed, pulling back the thick duvet and placing me down.
I expect him to cover me up, turn on his heels and leave, but he surprises me by kicking off his boots and climbing in beside me.
Cradling me to his chest and letting me sob as the tension I’ve held onto for so long melts away.
I feel the bed depress with Cooper’s weight behind me, and I let it all out.
Sniffling with my eyes closed tight as I lose myself wrapped in their comforting scents.
“I couldn’t lift you both, I tried. I refused to leave one of you behind.” The words clog my throat as I summersault headfirst into the darkness, the steady thumps of their heartbeats lulling me into a fretful sleep.