7. Aurora
7
AURORA
My keys jangle against the lock as my shaking hands struggle to find the keyhole. Finally, the door swings open and I practically fall inside our apartment, slamming it shut behind me as if I could lock out the nightmare I've just escaped.
"Hannah?" My voice cracks as I call out, though the dark apartment tells me what I need to know. Thank god she's still at the party.
I bolt to the bathroom, clicking the door shut and pressing my back against it as my chest heaves. The air won't come. I slide down to the floor, knees to my chest, fingers pressed against my temples.
"Breathe. Just breathe," I whisper to myself, but the panic is overwhelming.
Flashes of light. Cell phones. Photos. My face, captured forever in digital permanence.
By Sienna fucking Voss!
My fingers are already moving to my phone before my breathing steadies. I open Instagram first, my thumb trembling as I type "Sienna Voss" in the search bar. Her million-plus-follower profile shows up, and my stomach drops.
There I am. Staring in terror at her. And the caption: Ruslan Dragunov moves on quickly, doesn't he? Who is his new fling?
There are already over three hundred comments speculating wildly.
"OMG it's Ruslan Dragunov's new girl!" reads one comment. "Do we know who it is that made Sienna Voss lose her shit?" asks another.
My phone slips from my grip and clatters to the floor. A sob tears from my throat as I curl into myself.
Seven years of hiding. Seven years of being invisible. Seven years of looking over my shoulder. Seven years of being a ghost.
All gone in an instant because I couldn't keep my fucking self in check.
Kristofer will see these.
He'll know I'm alive.
He'll know where I am.
He'll know that Jamie Fields isn't dead.
I step outside the bathroom on wobbly legs, my mind racing with scenarios of how quickly I need to pack, where I can go, how much cash I have hidden?—
The front door clicks and swings open.
I scream, my body instinctively backing against the wall as adrenaline surges through me.
"Whoa! It's just me!" Hannah stands frozen in the doorway, keys dangling from her fingers. Her lips curl into a mischievous smile, eyes dancing with expectation. "Well, well, well. Didn't expect you home so?—"
The smile vanishes the moment she truly sees me: mascara streaking down my cheeks, hair wild, and body trembling.
"Aurora?" She drops her purse and rushes to my side. "What happened? What did he do to you?" Her hands hover over my shoulders, afraid to touch me. "Did that bastard hurt you? I'll call the cops right now."
"NO!" I scream, lunging forward to grab her wrist as she reaches for her phone. "No police. Please, Hannah. No police."
Her eyes widen, the concern deepening to genuine fear. "You're scaring me. What happened?"
"I fucked up," I whisper, my voice breaking. "I really fucked up."
She guides me to the couch, arm around my shoulders. "Whatever it is, we'll handle it."
I shake my head, the tears starting again. "You don't understand. It's not what Ruslan did. It's what I did."
"What are you talking about?"
My fingers twist together in my lap, knuckles white. "At the club. There was this actress. Sienna Voss. She took my picture, threw a bottle, shattered the glass wall." I look up at her, letting her see the raw terror in my eyes. "My face is all over social media right now."
Hannah's brow furrows. "You got caught in some celebrity drama photos? Is that what has you this upset?"
She doesn't understand, I can see it in her expression. Of course she doesn't understand.
I've never told her. I've never told anyone.
"I can't be photographed. Ever. There are... people who can't know where I am. Who I am."
Hannah sinks down next to me, confusion etched across her face. "Aurora, what are you saying? You've always been private, but this..."
The words stick in my throat. I've rehearsed this moment in my nightmares but never expected to actually live it. Seven years of secrecy, of looking over my shoulder, of whispering to myself that Jamie Fields is dead.
But Jamie Fields isn't dead. She's me. And I can't run anymore, at least not from Hannah.
"My name isn't Aurora Castellanos." My voice sounds foreign to my own ears. "It's Jamie Fields."
Hannah stays perfectly still, not even blinking, as if afraid any movement might stop me from continuing.
"Nine years ago, I started dating this police cadet named Kristofer Christensen. My parents hated him." The words tumble out faster now, like poison I need to expel. "A year and a half later, I broke up with him and he became obsessed with me. Started following me, watching my house, and showing up wherever I went. And there was nothing I could do. He was convinced that my parents were the only reason why we couldn't be together."
I squeeze my eyes shut, the images I've spent years trying to bury flashing behind my eyelids.
"One night, I came home and..." My voice gives out completely.
"What happened?" Hannah whispers.
"They were all dead. Mom. Dad. My little brother." I can't look at her. "He killed them."
Hannah covers her mouth. "Oh my god."
"He left me a message." My words come out hollow. "On the wall. In their blood."
I pause before I breathe to life the words that have haunted me for all these years.
"Look what you made me do."
Hannah gasps and her hand finds mine.
"I ran that night." I wipe at my tears with the back of my hand. "I just drove. Didn't sleep. Barely ate. Just kept driving west because I knew he'd be looking for me."
Hannah sits silently beside me, her eyes never leaving my face.
"I was running on empty. My car and myself. And that was when I saw the accident. Middle of nowhere on some back road in the Eastern Sierras." My voice steadies as I recall the moment that changed everything. "Her car was wrapped around a tree. She was already gone, no question about that. But her purse was there, and her ID too..."
I swallow hard.
"We looked similar enough. Same height, same build, same age give or take a few years."
Hannah's hand tightens around mine.
"It's not something I planned or something I'm proud of. I was just staring at her license, and suddenly I realized. This was my chance to disappear completely. So I took her credit cards, her phone, and left my wallet in her car."
I look down at our joined hands. "I knew what I was doing was wrong. I knew that there's a pair of parents out there who are still hoping that their daughter is alive. I knew that I was stealing someone else's life. But I was so scared, Hannah. A few weeks later, the police declared Jamie Fields dead. That's when Aurora Castellanos moved to Los Angeles and started over."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Because it's not a secret anymore if someone else knows." I grasp her hands. "You can't tell anyone about this. Ever. Promise me."
"I promise," she whispers, squeezing my fingers.
"I have to leave. Tonight. Start over again somewhere else."
"What? Why?"
"Because he's going to find me, Hannah. I can't stick around waiting for him to do that. What if he shows up here and I'm not here, but you are? I can't let you get hurt because of me."
Hannah shakes her head firmly. "But you can't just keep running forever. You can't face him by yourself."
"It's not worth the risk."
Hannah's arms wrap around me. "Yes it is. Don't you dare think for a moment I'm going to let you face that monster by yourself!"
She draws back, her eyes searching mine with a tenderness that makes my chest ache. "I can't believe you've been carrying this alone for so long, Jamie."
My entire body goes rigid, a wave of nausea crashing over me.
"No!" The word explodes from me with such force that Hannah flinches. "No," I repeat, softer this time but just as desperate. "Not Jamie. Never Jamie. That girl is dead."
I stand up, unable to stay still, energy crackling through me like electricity. "She died on that road in the eastern Sierras. She has to stay dead, Hannah. Do you understand?"
My hands rake through my hair, pulling it so tight it hurts. The pain helps focus me.
"Aurora Castellanos is who I am now." My voice cracks. "Aurora is the one who has a job, who pays taxes, who has a best friend named Hannah."
Hannah rises slowly, cautiously approaching me like I'm a frightened animal. "Okay," she whispers. "Aurora."
I press the heels of my palms against my eyes. "Every morning I wake up, I remind myself that Jamie Fields is dead. And every time I hear someone say the name Jamie, I'm terrified that it's him ."
"And he's still out there? After what he did?" Hannah's voice trembles with disbelief.
"Last I checked, he was working his way up the ranks in the Kansas City PD." A bitter laugh escapes me. "They made him a detective after my family's murders. He was praised for his 'dedication' to solving the case."
"That sick bastard." She takes a breath. "Aurora, I'm so sorry I pushed you toward Ruslan. I never would've done that if I knew."
My chest tightens at the mention of his name, remembering his touch, his lips.
"Don't." I shake my head. "Don't apologize. When I was with him... I felt alive, Hannah. For the first time in seven years. Even if it's just a few hours."
Hannah runs her hands through her hair, a visible effort to pull herself together. A half-smile flickers across her face as she tries to shift the mood.
"So... before all hell broke loose..." she asks hesitantly. "It was a good date?"
The unexpected question catches me off guard. After the emotional whirlwind of my confession, the shift back to something so mundane feels almost surreal.
But there's something touching about her attempt at normalcy.
My lips curl into an involuntary smile as memories of Ruslan flood back. "Honestly? It was the best date I've had in my entire life."
"Really?" Hannah's eyebrows shoot up, her smile widening slightly.
"God, Hannah, he was..." I trail off, searching for words that could capture the electricity between us. "I've never felt that way before. Like I could truly be myself with someone. He wanted to hear what I thought. He listened."
"And?" She gives me a knowing look.
Despite everything, a blush creeps up my cheeks. "And the way he kissed me... it was like the world stopped spinning for a minute. Like I was safe."
I sigh deeply, the pleasure of the memory immediately tainted by what followed. "I just wish it ended differently."
Hannah pulls me into a fierce hug, her arms wrapping around me tightly. I sink into her embrace, letting myself be held, the tension in my shoulders finally starting to release.
"Your secret is safe with me, Aurora," she whispers against my hair. "I promise."
She pulls back, keeping her hands on my shoulders, making sure I'm looking directly at her. "Now go get some sleep. You're exhausted. I'll keep an eye out tonight and check social media. See if anyone tries to doxx you."
"You don't have to."
"I want to," she says firmly. "You don't have to do everything alone anymore."
The lump in my throat makes it hard to speak. "Thank you," I manage to whisper.