Chapter 14 Roderick #2
I open my mouth to argue because it is necessary. Spencer always sleeps with his door locked. He has since we were kids. But the words dry up before I can even voice them as he reaches out and tests the knob, only for it to, in fact, turn.
What the fuck.
Kratos pushes the door open before he walks in, and this time, I’m right behind him.
Or I was.
I make it about two steps into the room before I stop dead in my tracks.
Kratos lets out a sigh of relief from beside me, and while I understand why, I also don’t completely relate relief with the sight before me.
Spencer lies on the bed, and considering this is his room, that’s not crazy.
No, what is crazy is Jade, who lies curled up next to him on his bed with him.
They’re laying next to each other, with Spencer under the covers and Jade on top of them as if she hadn’t intended on sleeping there.
That alone is strange enough, but what really throws me off is that Spencer is curled up to her back, his arm tucked around her waist, her back pressed to his front as if he pulled her close.
It feels like we stand there forever before I’m able to pull my eyes from them and turn to Kratos.
“How did you know she would be here?” I can’t help but ask because if it were up to me, we probably would have checked this whole damn house without ever looking here.
Shit, I probably would have gone to check the woods and even places like my parents, Hazel’s, and the club before I thought to check with Spencer.
“You said Zander wasn’t home, and you hadn’t seen her this morning. It was the only other logical place,” he tells me with a shrug, as if it makes complete sense, his eyes never looking away from Jade.
Only it doesn’t. It doesn’t make any sense at all.
“How?” I can’t help but ask because I need him to make it make sense.
My voice comes out louder than I intended it to, and I hear shifting from the bed. Looking over, I find it’s Spencer who’s stirring. Jade seems dead to the world because even as Spencer shifts, pulling his arm away from her, she doesn’t so much as budge.
Shit, he’s going to be pissed.
It only takes a moment for him to pull away completely and sit up, rubbing at his face and running a hand through his hair. He doesn’t even seem to realize that Jade’s there before he opens his eyes to find us both standing in his doorway, watching him.
My being there when he wakes isn’t that strange. I often have to come to collect them if we get orders early, but the moment his eyes land on Kratos, he goes from freshly awake to being completely alert.
He throws the covers off as if he’s going to get up, but when he does, his hand bumps Jade’s back. She still doesn’t stir, but it’s enough contact that he realizes something is there.
The look on his face is probably much like the look I had on my own when I found her here, but I can't even begin to explain what’s going on because I don’t know, and Kratos doesn’t seem to be in any rush to either.
Even as Spencer’s confused expression slowly morphs into one of anger before he turns to face us.
“What the fuck?” he shouts, hopping out of bed and moving away from it as if she might attack him at any moment.
I knew he wouldn’t be happy.
Spencer never lets anyone sleep in his bed. He hardly even lets people into his room.
“Shhh.” I look back at Jade, who still hasn’t moved a muscle. At this point, I almost feel the need to go and check on her. Is she still breathing?
Before I can, Kratos waves me off as if he can tell what I’m about to do.
“Don’t bother. She's fine. She probably won’t be up for a few more hours.”
“Okay, but what the fuck is she doing here?” Spencer hisses, his voice much quieter regardless. He turns to look at me, but all I can do is shake my head. I don’t know any more than he does.
We both turn to Kratos, and he finally turns his gaze away from Jade.
“Come on, I’ll explain.” Kratos walks out the door without bothering to make sure we’re following him. He knows we will because we want answers.
We make it back to the kitchen, finding Kratos with a cup of coffee, sitting at the counter. Spencer moves to fix himself a cup, and I follow suit. I might’ve already had coffee, but it’s not even noon and it’s already been a shitshow. I can only imagine one cup won’t be enough today.
Once we all have coffee, Spencer takes a seat, while I stand on the other side near the sink, facing them. I’m too on edge to sit right now.
“How did you know she would be in Spencer’s room?” I ask once it becomes clear Kratos isn’t going to just spill the answers out for us.
“You said Zander wasn’t home, and Jade doesn’t start her morning without coffee now. So when she wasn’t in her room, I knew she had to still be asleep.”
He says it so confidently, like that’s it, and for a moment, I worry that maybe I’m just not understanding.
“I don’t understand how that would make you think to come and check my room. She could have easily been in Zander’s bed, you know, where she’s actually known to sleep,” Spencer says, following the same line of thought I had earlier. “What would make her pick my room of all the places in the house?”
“You're misunderstanding. She didn’t choose your room. She chose you.” Kratos explains, taking a sip of his coffee as if that cleared it all up.
“Why in the fuck would she ever do that?” Spencer snaps, and while I understand his question, his anger is quickly getting the best of him.
“Have you ever dealt with trauma?” Kratos asks, looking first at Spencer and then over at me.
I feel like it’s a stupid question to ask. He knows we have. Being in Vengeance isn’t always a walk in the park. Not to mention we’ve had our own share of shit happen throughout our lives even before that.
“Not all responses to trauma are rational,” he says without waiting for our reply.
For the first time since I asked for an explanation, what he says makes perfect sense. I know Spencer understands that just as well as I do.
Kratos drains the last of his coffee, setting his mug down with a deep sigh.
“Jade has a tendency to look for comfort after something traumatic. If you ask the girls, Charlotte in particular, I bet she can probably recall at least a handful of times she woke up with Jade near. I’m sure she probably would have chalked it up to her being protective, but that’s not what it is.
” He shakes his head, his lips turned down in a frown.
“Over the years, there were many times I would get a message out of the blue after weeks of no contact. It would be nothing but a location, but it didn’t matter where I was or what I had to do to get there, she needed me.”
I can’t look away from him to see how Spencer is reacting to this news. I want to, but I can’t. We’ve worked for him for years, and during that time, Kratos has always been business and muscle. This is a whole new side of him, and it all has to do with Jade.
“She would come to me a mess. Sometimes physically, sometimes emotionally, both more often than not.”
He’s looking down at his empty mug, but it’s almost as if he’s not seeing it. His eyes are far away as if he’s reliving those times, and I wonder what he’s seeing. What could have happened?
Thankfully, I don’t have to ask.
“In the beginning, she came to me covered in blood. Sometimes it wasn’t hers, but more often than not, it was.
She would be beaten, bruised, and in need of medical attention.
I got her the help she needed, and she would stay with me for a while before she crashed.
When I woke up, she was always gone. The older she got, the more her skills developed, and with each kill, she got better.
The blood she wore was like art to her, and while she no longer came to me in tatters, she still came.
” His words weren't loud, but he had every scrap of my attention. I watch as his shoulders sag.
I almost feel bad making him relive these old memories. Having to think back to a time when someone he cares about was risking their life on a daily basis, and there was nothing he could do to stop it or help. Not to mention knowing the things she probably had to endure while in the rings.
Kratos takes a deep breath before he continues.
“At first, I didn’t understand why, but I still showed up when she needed me.
I promised her I would, and I fucking meant it.
” He slams his fist down on the counter hard enough that his empty mug rattles, but he doesn’t even seem to notice, or if he does, he doesn’t seem to care.
“It wasn’t until she came to me one night in tears that I started to understand.”
The room’s so quiet that it’s almost as if time has frozen. I glance at Spencer and find that he’s just as caught up in Kratos’s story as I am, yet neither of us dares press him right now.
Kratos’s voice draws my attention back to him.
“I met her in a run-down motel. Until then, she had me meet her strictly at abandoned buildings or wooded areas, places without people or witnesses. But this time was different. This time when I showed up, she wasn’t wounded, and the only blood on her wasn’t her own, or even someone she had killed. ”
He swallows thickly. I watch his Adam's apple bob, and I know whatever he’s going to say isn’t going to be pretty, but I’m starting to realize that most of Jade’s and even his own past isn’t.
The same way we have shit thrown in our mostly regular lives is how they have good days thrown in their mostly fucked up ones.
“Jade wasn’t able to save most of the girls in the beginning.
Yes, she was able to put herself up more often than not, but it was never a guarantee they would choose her, not like it was in the end.
Having the girls go through that tore her apart, but it’s also a lot of what pushed her to be better.
To go for killing blows and become the perfect choice in those fucked up rings. ”