Chapter 46 Jade
There are so many people everywhere.
Elio’s house is huge, but somehow it doesn’t matter where we go.
There are just more people. Most of them stop and stare, and I’m not sure if it’s because we’re unknown or because of my entourage.
Either way, I can’t get the creeping feeling to leave me alone, and it only gets worse the longer the night goes on.
Kyn and her mother were with us for a while before they had to make their rounds and mingle.
I don’t envy her. I wouldn’t want to be in her shoes, but I can understand why she’s willing to do all this.
Talking with them while we got ready was eye-opening.
The world of the mafia has long been run by only men. Women were to remain at home or behind the scenes. It’s an idea that has been around for hundreds of years and has been passed down from generation to generation.
My father was among the first to challenge it, and though it didn’t turn out as he’d hoped, it encouraged others to do the same.
Matteo didn’t want to pass his title down to his son because he didn’t want it.
He knew Kyn could handle it, so he took the same stance my father did.
Thankfully, so far, it’s had a better turnout for them, for her.
Though many people weren’t thrilled about it, Kyn was old enough to handle herself when he broke the news.
My life has always been something I’ve tried to be proud of, defending those who couldn’t defend themselves, but it’s more than that now.
Even though it all turned to shit, the decision to let me run the family changed not only my future but also the way things are done for people like Kyn.
She might not enjoy this part, but she really wants to take over for her father and make him proud.
Even after just a short time with her, I believe she can.
All that thinking about that does is make my stomach roll, though. As great as it all is, I’m supposed to meet my parents tonight. They aren’t here yet, but they should be anytime now.
We’d hoped to have them here after Ivan showed up, but as far as I know, he hasn’t shown up yet, either. It’s only been an hour, tops, but with every minute that ticks by, I feel something isn’t right.
“I’m gonna go to the bathroom.” I lean into Spencer to tell him, and he nods.
I split from the guys and head back toward our rooms, not even waiting for Spencer to tell the others.
I know he will, and I really have to pee, maybe even throw up, with the way my stomach is tying itself in knots.
I’d been trying to only sip slowly, but my nerves got the best of me.
At this point, I won’t make it much longer, and it might do me good to get away for a minute or two.
Each of our rooms has its own bathroom, and even though the public ones are much closer, I can’t bring myself to use them. The nagging feeling in my gut just doesn’t think it’s a great idea.
I make it back to the rooms pretty quickly and slip into the first one at the end of the hall.
I’m not even really sure whose room is whose anymore.
For the last week, we’ve been switching back and forth, depending on who can handle who each night.
Nobody has stayed with Zan for longer than a night, except for me.
He’s been driving them all nuts about sightseeing and making the most of this trip, and I think it’s kind of adorable.
The room is thankfully empty, and I go straight into the bathroom. The second I step in, I’m hit with the delicious smell of Rick’s cologne, and I can’t help but breathe it in.
Knowing Rick was here, at least to get ready, brings me comfort. I finish up and wash my hands, allowing myself a moment more, taking deep, even breaths to calm my racing thoughts and pulse.
No matter what happens, we end this tonight.
Together.
I tell myself that a few times, believing it more each time. Checking my makeup, I head back out, ready to face the rest of the night.
Two steps are all it takes for me to realize I’m not alone.
The room is dimly lit, but not so dark that I can’t make out the figure that stands off to the side of the bed, tucked partially into the shadows. I’d somehow walked past them on my way to the door and didn’t even realize, too lost in my own thoughts.
Shit. I know better than to be sloppy like this.
I watch them as they watch me, neither of us making a move as I size them up. They’re smaller, shorter than the guys, but still a bit taller than me and thin. Either a small man or a woman, perhaps.
I’m almost positive I can outrun them. The door is only a couple of steps away. I could make it out and disappear into the crowd easily enough, but something won’t let me leave. Something about this person feels different.
“Wow, you’re all grown up,” a quivering voice says, and something about it rings familiar in my ears even though I can’t place it.
“I’m so proud of you, Jade.” Their voice is stronger this time, but I can still hear the crack of emotion as they step forward, and the pieces click into place just before I see them.
Ashlynn.
She steps into the light from the bathroom, and seeing her face, I stagger back a step.
It’s been years. So long that I’d given up hope I would ever see her again, that she was even alive. I told myself she was gone, that it was my fault, and I learned to live with that.
“How?” I choke out the word. A million questions rush through my brain as I try and fail to understand how this could be happening.
A small smile turns up her lips as she continues forward. This time, I don’t move away, unable to as shock and disbelief grip me.
“That night when I laid you down, I thought I’d never see you again.
They sent me away, and I ended up dancing in a club in New York.
It wasn’t as bad as what we endured before, but I was still only property.
The girls there were all around my age or older.
They’d been stuck there for years, but they were alive, much better off than I would have been if I'd stayed.”
She gives a sad shake of her head as more tears roll down her face, but she pushes on, and I hang from her every word.
“For years, it was the same thing. We danced, had sex, and did as we were told to bring money in. They kept us fed, clean, and even took care of our hair and bought us fancy clothes to keep up the charade that we wanted to be there, that we chose that life. It was better than I had ever known and was more than I thought I would ever get again. I fell into the role, told myself to be happy with what I had. I became compliant.” She bites off the last word with a snarl that lets me know just how upset she is about that.
“It’s not your fault. Being happy to be alive and have more isn’t wrong, Ash.” I rush to tell her, trying to ease her obvious guilt. I know how easy it is to blame yourself, but she didn’t have a choice. None of us did.
“You’re wrong,” she says, her voice hardly more than a whisper as she looks down at me.
Her gaze is so intense that it feels like she’s looking through me.
Ashlynn was the closest thing I ever had to a parent or older sibling, someone to look out for me while I was in that hell, the only person to ever care.
She knew me, what I needed, how to comfort me, and even after years apart, I still feel that pull with her. Like she can see every deep, dark secret I hold with just a look.
Fuck, I hope that’s not true. How would she ever look at me the same if she knew the monster I’d become to survive?
“A few years was all it took for me to stop fighting, to roll over and take it. I’d probably still be there if not for you.”
She wipes at her eyes as fresh tears roll down her cheeks, and my confusion must be clear on my face. Taking a deep breath, she steps forward and pushes a stray strand of hair behind my ear as she looks down at me like she can’t believe I’m standing here before her.
“Rumors started circulating. Rings were going down, girls getting out, all because of one girl who served justice to those who thought they could own us like possessions.” Her eyes shine, not with tears this time but with pride, and my breath hitches as understanding sets in.
“You gave so many of us hope and started a movement all by yourself.”
Tears gather in my eyes, but I blink them away, unwilling to let them fall.
“I didn’t know it was you right away, but I’d hoped.
You surviving without me was the one thing that kept me going.
I couldn’t let myself believe I failed you, or I would have given up.
Through it all, I just wanted you safe, happy.
” She laughs, but there’s no happiness, and I understand.
What a tall order to set when we know the way life is on the inside.
For her to hope for that would be her way of praying for a miracle.
“I am safe and happy, Ash,” I tell her, meaning it for probably the first time in my life.
“Elio came into the club one night, and something about him was different. He didn’t look at us the same way the other men did. There was sadness in his eyes as he watched us, not hunger. When he asked for a private show, I volunteered. I needed to see for myself.”
It’s no shock to me that Elio was doing his own recon in his area.
I know how hard he looked for his sister, the lengths he went to.
Going to auctions and putting his own resources into bringing rings down wherever he could.
He’s been on our side the whole time, even if we didn’t know it then.
His need to find Emma was a lot like Dom’s need to find me.
I stop that thought before it can fully form. I don’t have time to deal with the emotions behind it, not right now, maybe not ever.
“He wanted to find his sister. His story was so much like what we all dream about. Being trapped and having someone come to save us, having someone who cared.”