32. Emily
32
EMILY
I’m in the middle of reviewing my matron of honor speech while Nadia fusses with the final updated headcount at her wedding when Konstantin walks in, his blue eyes heavy with thoughts.
Something’s wrong.
“Did something happen?” I ask him.
He rakes his hand through his hair and then rubs the five o’clock shadows on his face. Looking at me and then at Nadia, he doesn’t say a word. A tingle of nausea bubbles in my gut, and I’m pretty sure that it’s not because of the baby.
“Jesus, sit down.” Nadia gets up and takes his arm, leading him to sit down on the chair next to me. “Before you fall over.”
He collapses onto the fluffy cushions and stare at the floor. But all I can see is the concern swirling in his head as his jaw clenches.
“Nadia, can we have a moment?” I ask.
“No, she can stay,” Konstantin says before Nadia can answer. “This concerns her as well. ”
Dread snakes its way through me at what he says. Whatever it is that has him so bothered, it can’t be good.
Nadia and I exchange one final look, and then she slowly sits down next to me.
“Tell me,” I say to him. “What’s wrong?”
He looks at both of us, as if weighing how to best broach whatever is on his mind, before he sighs and lays it out plainly in front of us.
“Domenico is here in New York. We’re in danger.” He looks at me. “All of us, even Nadia.”
“How do you know?” Nadia gasps.
He glares at her, and to Nadia’s credit, she doesn’t recoil like she would’ve when she first saw him at her apartment.
“Konstantin.” I reach out and take his hand. “Whatever it is, you need to tell us. How do you know this?”
“Sima had a talk with the consigliere of another mafia don here in New York,” he explains. “Not by choice.”
Now it’s my turn to gasp. “Is he alright?”
“He’s fine.” Konstantin says quickly. “But the information is genuine. He’s currently out in the city right now to see what else he can find, but none of this is looking good. I just thought …” he pauses. “I thought after what we did to Domenico in Capri, he’d finally just learn that it’s better to crawl into a hole and disappear. But he just can’t let go of his stubborn pride.”
“That makes two of you.” Nadia points out.
I think she’s trying to lighten the mood, but Konstantin doesn’t take it well, not in the moment at least. He glares at her again and I know that nothing can cheer him up or lighten the black mood that he’s in. It’s slowly embedding itself in the depth of his mind, and all I can do is continue holding onto his hand .
“What did Sima say exactly?” I ask. “And you can trust Nadia. She won’t tell.” I look over at her. “Right?”
She draws pinched fingers across her lips. “I’m no blabbermouth. But I’ll give you two the privacy you need. I’ve got enough on my mind without worrying about whatever insane plans the two of you are about to discuss.”
With that, she gets up, walks over to the bathroom, and closes the door.
The ghost of a grim smile curls at the corner of Konstantin’s lips.
Taking one final breath, he tells me everything – about how Sima came after a call from another bratva pakhan, how he was stopped by a man named Christian Genovesi, and about the warning of Domenico being here in New York.
But more importantly, he tells us how his presence here is being interpreted by the other criminal organizations as an act that might precede violence.
“All I want is to keep you safe, Emily.” His expression softens, but his voice remains iron-hard. “To keep our child safe. To keep your friends safe. I nearly lost you once to Domenico already, and I won’t allow that to happen again. You will always come first in my life, Emily. But I can’t keep you safe without starting another war. And if I start this war, I don’t think I can win.”
Disappointment fills my heart. It’s not fair! I think angrily. After everything we’ve been through, after all of the heartbreak and suffering, I thought that we might finally get a chance to do something ordinary for once.
To do something happy.
To celebrate.
And now …
“I’m sorry, Emily.” Konstantin hangs his head. “I failed you.”
“No, you didn’t.” I tell him as my anger turns into a fierce resolution. “You haven’t.”
He turns and looks at me, his legs tense, and I know he’s about to stand to say something.
But I give him a hard stare to force him back to his seat.
“Since the day I met you, you’ve never been one to back down from a challenge,” I tell him before he can start. “You’ve faced countless impossible odds, countless people who tried to separate us for good. Yet every time, you’ve found a way around it. And I’m sure you’ll find a way around this as well.”
“Emily.” Konstantin laughs, but the sound is strained and pained. “I don’t think I can find a way around this one. The only way to keep Domenico from hurting any of you is if I rip his throat out with my own fingers. And if I do that …”
“Then everyone in New York will unite against you.” I finish. “I know. But are you sure that’s what will happen?”
“You heard what they told Sima. They’re telling that to me in the plainest possible terms.” He turns away. “I know a threat when I hear one.”
I fall silent, and I consider everything he’s told me again. I know for a fact that he’s made up his mind to kill Domenico, because he and I both know that we’ll never be safe as long as Domenico stays alive.
But something else is here. Something that neither of us is seeing.
Hang on …
“This message from Christian Genovesi,” I start slowly. “I don’t think it’s a threat, at least not the threat that you think it is. ”
“What do you mean?”
“Well,” I breathe. “Nobody ever makes threats to someone that can do something about it. If it’s a genuine threat, the only person they’ll threaten is someone who can’t do anything to stop them.” I take a deep trembling breath. “Right before Alla hurt me, she didn’t breathe a single word of it to you. But she didn’t hesitate to tell me. Because she knew that there was nothing I could do to stop her, especially once you were gone.”
His fists clench as he recalls the way his grandmother hurt me in his absence. But I can also see thoughts turning behind those handsome eyes of his. He says nothing, and I know that I’m reaching him.
“I think you know that they’re afraid of what you might do after you kill Domenico,” I say. “They’re afraid that you’re going to upset their balance of power, right?”
“Right.”
“But whatever alliance they make with each other is only going to be temporary.” I point out, the words tumbling out of my mouth almost as fast as I can think them. “Once they’re done fighting you, they’ll go right back to fighting themselves. And in that case, nothing between them has actually changed.”
“I …” His brow furrows as he nods, realization slowly dawning in his eyes. “I think you have something here.”
“These men.” I cradle his face and gaze deeply into his eyes. “Do they know that you’ve put me first in your life? Do they know that if you have to choose, you’ll always choose me?”
“No,” he admits.”
“Then make them see, Konstantin.” I stroke his face, feeling the rough stubble on his chin scraping at my fingers. “Make them understand that you’re not here to take something from them. That you’re only here because you want to be by my side as I attend my best friend’s wedding. That the only reason you’ll kill Domenico—and you will kill Domenico—is to keep me safe.”
My hand drifts down to the slight swell in my belly. “To keep us safe.”
His gaze turns to the hand on my belly, and I see the emotions warring in his ice-blue eyes.
“The East Coast Bratvas and the Lanzzare Mafia,” I say. “They expect you to be a ruthless pakhan. They don’t expect you to be a husband willing to do the one thing a ruthless pakhan would never do.”
“Which is?”
“To look a gift horse in the mouth and say no.” I smile. “To win a war and take no prizes. To conquer without plundering. Sometimes, you have to back down to get what you want, what you really want, and I think I know that is.”
“You,” he says. “It’s always been you. It will always be you.”
My nose stings as tears brim at my eyes. He reaches over and wipes it away before it can leak out.
“You don’t have to win every fight,” I tell him. “You only have to win this one fight.”
Bit by bit, the smile on his face turns hopeful, and he pulls me in for a deep kiss. When we break apart, tears are swimming in both our eyes.
“You’re an absolutely amazing woman, do you know that?” He asks. “The perfect wife for a pakhan.”
“Well.” I smirk. “I am married to one hell of a pakhan.”
“I will end this,” he says. “I will keep you and our child safe. And when this is over, I will dance with you at Nadia’s wedding tomorrow night. I promise. ”
“Konstantin Siderov,” I say as I lean in close for another kiss. “Don’t you dare make me a promise if you aren’t going to keep it.”