14. Rory
14
RORY
I find it surprisingly hard to sleep, and when I do doze off, I find myself dreaming about Lara Burke’s big, green eyes.
I wake up with the vaguest memory of watching her laugh in my mother’s library, and I frown to myself, sitting up. I feel a little out of place, somehow expecting to be back in my apartment in another city.
My father’s guest room is much more ornate and a lot bigger than my bedroom back at home.
Home.
I grew up in this house, but it feels less like home than anywhere else I’ve ever been. I miss my penthouse apartment, miss my doorman, Dave. I even miss the weird cat lady who lives on the bottom floor and always complains about her life to me while we check our mail.
But I’m trying to focus on Lara, on this plan, on keeping her and my sister safe. I have to go through with this wedding. I have to convince my father that I’m doing this for all the right reasons.
Or rather, the wrong reasons.
I head into the shower connected to the guest bedroom, and luckily there’s some toiletries in there. The staff keeps up the guest rooms for my father’s men, who often stay over, especially when we need heavy security.
I’m surprised that my father hasn’t already initialized a heavy security situation, but he may be waiting for closer to the wedding.
Which is scheduled for the weekend, just four days away.
I’m going to get married in four days.
I shuck off my pajama pants and underwear and get into the shower, growling when it’s too cold. I finally get the temperature right, and the water pours down on top of my head, waking me up.
I take my time washing my hair and my body, feeling like I’ve got ants crawling under my skin. I’m just anxious about all of this, about the possibility of my father finding out I’m working with Lara, about getting married, even though it’ll be temporary.
I look down at my morning erection, sighing softly. May as well let off some steam.
I skim my fingers below my belly button, and I let out a moan when I wrap my fingers around myself.
It’s usually pretty easy to get off this way, in the shower, thinking about past experiences I’ve had with women. Or sometimes, it’s a faceless, nameless woman, just a body.
I’m not very imaginative.
But when I start to pump my fist, my breath coming shorter, it’s Lara’s bright eyes that flash in my mind. Her thin frame, the way her hips are just slightly wide, her ass bigger than her slightness would suggest.
I think about how small her hand fit in mine, how her lips felt parting against mine when I kissed her.
Her name is on my lips when I spill onto the shower wall, and I pant, looking down at the water swirling down the drain.
What the hell was that ?
I try not to think about it, hurriedly getting out of the shower and toweling off. I’m still breathing hard when I put on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt. I’m running out of clothes since I only packed for a few days, and I’ll have to ask Kristina to do my laundry.
I’ve got to go pick up the rings and get fitted for a tuxedo. I figure since Lara has to dress up, I should, too, not just relying on the suits I have with me.
Just focus on that. Focus on getting to the wedding. Everything else... well, it’s all too confusing.
I make my way downstairs and nearly run into Duncan, one of my father’s men. He grins at me, and I can’t help but grin back.
Duncan and I went to high school together. He was a couple of years my senior, and my father had practically taken him in when he was eighteen. He’s fiercely loyal to my father, but he’s also always been a wonderful friend to me.
“Rory. I heard you were back, but I didn’t believe it.”
“Believe it.” I pull him into a hug, clapping him on the back before pulling away. “What are you doing here? Security?”
“Something about a wedding?” He tilts his head. “You know me, your Da says jump, I say how high.”
“We really have to catch up.” I pause, thinking about it.
I need someone to talk to, someone to bounce ideas off. I can’t tell Duncan the whole truth, but I can tell him some of it. “Do you want to run some errands with me?”
“Sure. I’m too early, anyway. The old man says he won’t be back in town until this evening.”
I nod, heading out to my car.
Duncan slides into the passenger seat. “So, what’s this about a wedding?”
I can’t help but snort out a laugh. “We’re going to pick up the rings right now.”
“The rings for who ?”
“For me.”
Duncan stares at me, his mouth gaping open. “ You ? Who the hell are you marrying? Someone from out of town.”
“Nah. Someone you know pretty well, at least by name.”
He frowns. “You’ve got to tell me.”
“Lara. Lara Burke.”
“You’re marrying a Burke ?”
I laugh. “That’s right.”
“What has happened while you were away?”
I let out a breath. “Declan Burke kidnapped my sister and married her. My father wants an eye for an eye.”
“I heard about your sister turning Burke, but I didn’t know she was taken.” Duncan’s brown eyes widen.
I shrug. “Why else would she ever be with a Burke? They’ve got her brainwashed.”
I feel guilty even saying that to Duncan. I know it’s a lie. My sister had been worried about Lara and succinct, but I can tell that she’s happy. That she wants this.
“Jesus. No wonder your Da went after Patrick the way he did.”
I nod, and let the conversation die. We sit silent for a few minutes.
I don’t want to hear any details of my father’s crimes, so it’s for the best.
We soon arrive at the jewelry store, and I turn off the car and open the door.
“Let’s get the rings.”
Duncan and I walk into store, and he looks over at a case of watches as I walk up to the cashier.
“Picking up an online order for Rory Murphy.”
I hate the way the cashier looks at me when I say my name, her eyes widening in fear.
“Y-yes, sir.”
She quickly heads into the back, returning with two ring boxes that she puts in a small bag.
“Is there anything else I can help you with, sir?”
I shake my head, hurrying out of the jewelry store and leaving Duncan behind.
He comes jogging up to me.
“You got out of there like it was on fire. Something wrong?”
I shake my head and get into the car, slamming the door.
Duncan slowly gets inside, too, and he glares at me. “I’ve known you long enough to know when something is up, Rory.”
“Yeah, well, we haven’t spoken in years. Maybe I've changed.”
“People don’t change.”
I sigh, actually agreeing with him.
“I guess I’m just nervous. About getting married.” It’s true, I am nervous, but being seen as a monster just because of who my father is bothers me more. It’s not like I can tell Duncan that.
Duncan nods. “I mean, my ma always says it’s just a piece of paper, but it’s a scary piece of paper. I get it.”
“You do?”
He scoffs. “Of course, I do. Hell, I don’t think I ever want to get married.”
I let out a breath. “I guess I always assumed that I would, someday. But I never thought it’d be like this.”
“When is the wedding?”
“Sunday.”
“This Sunday? Jesus Christ.”
I laugh and back out of the parking garage, the rings in my pocket feeling like heavy weights.
I’d picked out a simple white gold band for my own ring, and Lara had chosen her size, so I know they’ll fit.
But my stomach feels sick, thinking about marrying her against her will. She hates this at least as much as I do.
We return to the mansion, and Duncan disappears somewhere, maybe looking for my father since his car is in the garage. He must have gotten into town sooner than anticipated.
Speaking with Lara about guns has reminded me that I should probably work on my shooting skills. I’m back in my hometown, and for a Murphy, that always means danger.
I left Kristina with instructions to bring up Lara’s meals just so that I could run some errands, and I’m grateful that I’m not tasked with that right now. I don’t want to see her, not while everything is so confusing.
A couple of miles down our estate path, a gun range sits out in an open field.
I drive my father’s golf cart down there and park it, heading to the armory. I reach into my pocket, surprised that I still have the key to it.
I unlock it and look at the variety of rifles and handguns my father has on display. I go for my .45 instantly, and the feel of it in my hand is somewhat nostalgic.
Instead of teaching me to throw a ball around, my father had taught me how to handle nearly any firearm.
“Never point at anything you don’t intend to kill,” he always said.
So, I keep the barrel down even as I load it.
I don’t lift the gun until I stand right across from the first target, a bullseye a few hundred yards away. I let out a breath as I aim, shooting five shots into the target.
I point the barrel at the ground again while I press the button to bring the target close.
Five shots, just around the bullseye. I guess muscle memory makes up a lot of firearm skill, because I haven’t fired a gun in years.
I move through the targets easily until I get to the last one, peering down the range to see the human-sized figure at the end.
This has always been the target I have the most trouble with. It’s hard for me to think about killing a person, and that target represents a human being.
I can fight when I need to, but killing? That’s something I’ve never had to do.
I think about Lara, about Scott towering over her, her terrified screams. They’d been so high-pitched, and she’d been fighting him with all her might.
I squeeze off two shots and then lower my gun, hitting the button.
As the target approaches me, I notice two holes, right in the middle of the forehead.
If that had been a person, they’d be dead indeed.
I frown slightly, trying not to think about what that means.
Chapter Fifteen