Chapter Eighteen
GREY FROZE AT the sound of Emily’s name, and pulled her hand slowly from Lauren’s breast and let it fall to her waist. She closed her eyes, leaned her temple against Lauren’s, and took a long, slow breath in through her nose, inhaling the sweet scent of Lauren’s perfume.
She focused on the way her heart beat inside her chest, slowly, steadily, and she felt a gentle warmth radiate through her, like Emily was reassuring her that it was okay for her to move on.
She pressed a chaste kiss to Lauren’s cheek and then took a small step back, not so far to lose contact with Lauren, but just enough that she was no longer pinning her to the counter.
Her eyes roamed slowly over Lauren’s face, over kiss-swollen lips and dark, gray-green eyes.
Lauren’s cheeks were flushed, and her hair was in mild disarray from the way she had been running her fingers through it.
Grey shook her head as she finally answered Lauren’s question.
“No. This is not because you look like Emily. If anything, it’s in spite of the fact that you do. ”
The breath Lauren had not realized she had been holding left her in a long, drawn-out stream. “What do you mean?”
Grey shrugged and ran her hands through her hair as she tried to find a way to explain it all.
“I did not want to feel like this toward you,” she said, perhaps a little too honestly.
But, she figured, they were discussing Lauren’s resemblance to her deceased fiancée, so there really was nothing that could be more of a mood-kill than that.
“I would have fired you that first day if I knew how to cook well enough to do the job on my own.”
Lauren nodded, not particularly surprised by the confession. “I thought I had done something to make you hate me and, for the life of me, I could not figure out what it was.”
“You reminded me too much of her,” Grey said softly.
“But then…I dunno.” She shook her head. “It was little things, I guess, that began chipping away at me without me even noticing. I mean, you’re obviously different people, but it was hard, at first, to see that when looking at you reminded me of her.
But the more time we spent together, the more I started to see it.
You’re much more driven—I don’t think I can name one person who would choose to work during their first vacation in a decade.
Emily was content to just go with the flow, not really looking to do more than enjoy life.
You like the quiet, you enjoy just sitting back and taking it all in like me…
I mean, Emily always sat with me like you’ve done these last few days, but she didn’t crave the quiet.
It’s just…” She shrugged. “You’re just different.
You express yourself differently, New York brusqueness mixed with Midwestern sweetness.
You move with a purpose, like every motion has to accomplish something. I don’t know how to explain it.”
“Grey…”
Grey sighed. “I know. All of this would be so much easier if looking at you didn’t remind me of her, but I liked kissing you. And I would really like to do it again.”
Lauren nodded slowly as she processed everything Grey had just said.
“I liked it too. I would be lying if I said that I’m not attracted to you, and I’m not looking for this to be anything serious, but I don’t want to compete with a ghost. I don’t want to be with you, and know that you’re thinking about her. ”
The left side of Grey’s mouth quirked up in a small smile, and she shook her head almost sadly as she reached up to tuck an errant curl behind Lauren’s ear. She lingered in the touch for a moment before she let her hand fall away. “It wouldn’t be like that.”
Lauren sighed. There was an openness in Grey’s expression that told her it was the truth, but she was still not convinced that this was the smart thing to do.
For as much as she enjoyed kissing Grey, and for as much as she was sure she would enjoy doing more than just kiss, she did not want to do anything that would hurt her in the end.
“So what do you want to do?” she asked, leaving the ball in Grey’s court, trusting that she would make the decision that was best for her.
Grey’s smile widened as she leaned in and captured Lauren’s lips in a slow kiss that simmered with relief and possibilities.
“Whatever we want,” she murmured as she pulled away.
The sound of excited voices had her looking up toward the back deck, and she sighed as she spotted three little tow-heads bounding into the salon.
“We’re baaaaaaaack!” Peyton and Max sing-songed, swinging t-shirts over their heads excitedly and slashing at the air with plastic pirate swords. “We got shirts and swords!”
“Me too!” Reid echoed, jumping up and down and waving his prizes in the air.
Grey took a discreet step away from Lauren, who was running her hands through her hair to try and put herself back together, and smiled at the boys. “Lemme see ‘em!”
They both listened intently as the boys rehashed their entire trip ashore, including an animated discussion of whether or not the bearded man they saw in one of the stores was a “real life pirate!”, and Lauren smiled when Will and Kim ushered the boys toward their rooms to get ready for bed.
“Are you guys going to want a nightcap and dessert or anything?”
“If it’s not too much trouble, that would be great.” Will tipped his head in thanks. “The boys ended up hogging the sundae we got to share at the restaurant.”
“That explains their energy,” Lauren chuckled. She waved at him to go after the boys, and turned toward the fridge. The small of her back felt heavy with the weight of Grey’s eyes on her, and she sighed as she pulled the fridge door open. “You know, I can feel you watching me.”
“Really?” Grey smirked and glanced over her shoulder to make sure they were alone as she sidled up behind Lauren. She ran a light finger down Lauren’s spine and chuckled softly at the way Lauren twitched under the playful touch. “Can you feel that too?”
“Yes.” Lauren let out a shaky breath as she leaned back into Grey. The chill pouring from the fridge stood in stark contrast to the heat coming off the woman behind her, and she shook her head. “And I really need you to stop that now.”
Grey’s eyes fluttered at the roughness in Lauren’s tone, and she could not resist leaning in to brush a soft kiss across her cheek. “Are you sure about that?”
“Go give your mom a kiss goodnight,” Will’s voice carried through the salon.
“Unfortunately,” Lauren whispered. “We are not alone, and if you keep teasing me…”
A wolfish grin pulled at Grey’s lips. “What?”
Lauren shuddered as the many possibilities of what she could do flashed through her mind. “Grey,” she said, the brunette’s name a warning. “Please? I need to make this dessert for Will and Kim.”
“Fine.” Grey nodded as she backed away. “Later?”
“I’m shakin’ my hiney!” Peyton sang at the top of his lungs. “I’m shakin’ my hiney!”
Grey and Lauren turned to find him standing in the middle of the salon in his Spiderman pajamas, wiggling his little ass and grinning like a maniac.
Lauren laughed and reached out to give Grey’s hand a gentle squeeze as Will swept the hiney-shaking boy into his arms and “flew” him into his bedroom. “Later sounds wonderful. Maybe when we’re alone?”
“Yeah,” Grey sighed and shook her head, not even bothering to try and hide the longing she could feel burning in her gaze. “Later.”