Chapter 50
Since Dagen wouldn’t approve of me torturing his wife —no matter how awful she is—I am resorting to more efficient tactics. Kathreen is visiting the Zem palace for a few days. And I’m going too.
Unfortunately, Sorren is available to wipe the floor with me. And he does. Over, and over, and over again.
As I keep getting back up, I swear I feel flickers of pride emanating from Dae, who wouldn’t let me face Sorren alone, even though he can’t help from outside my shield.
Having Dae at my side is like having a sturdy wall holding me up, especially when Sorren delivers a nasty kick to my jaw that blurs the room.
Dae’s tension radiates around me as gashes appear down my leathers and small bones are broken, but I don’t back down.
When I crawl into bed after Preysee’s oils and salve have begun healing my wounds, Dae heads to my balcony to leave like yesterday. Last night’s dreams play across my mind, as if promising a vengeful return tonight.
“Wait,” I say, my voice small.
His presence halts, air swirling near the balcony doors.
“Don’t go.”
Without a word, his spirit hovers back to me and settles near my side of the bed, a cool wall of energy blocking out the rest of the world.
Not a single nightmare finds me.
Preysee bustles in as I’m scraping sleep from my eyes. “Your betrothed just arrived for you, my lady.”
I sit up. “This early?”
She disappears into my closet and returns, a red dress with a plunging neckline in tow. “I don’t pretend to know much about the other realms,” she says. “But I wouldn’t be surprised if their sense of time is a bit different from ours.”
I groan and find the cold marble floor with my toes before trudging to the vanity where she’s currently fussing over my makeup, uncapping lipsticks, blush, and eye palettes. “No time for a bath today I’m afraid.”
A throb enters my chest as I take the dress from Preysee and put it on myself. Liha would be bouncing all around my room right now.
Preysee does my hair in a sleek updo and keeps my makeup simple, but to my liking.
Black around my eyes and a matte red lip. If Lekk doesn’t like it, he can take his betrothal somewhere else.
Preysee leads me to the full-length mirror inside my closet to approve her work. Just when the aching pit in my stomach from Liha’s absence begins to gnaw deeper, Dagen’s dark presence floats around me.
“A second date,” he says. “Must be serious.” His voice has an edge to it this morning that wasn’t there last night.
When Preysee leaves for my perfumes, I mutter, “Jealous?”
“Brutal honesty?”
I shoot him a look that says, “Duh.”
He’s standing behind me as I face my full-length mirror, and his velvet words caress my skin. “Annoyingly so.”
“You’re such a shameless flirt,” I say, but warmth is flooding every part of me, and suddenly I’m remembering him in my bathing chamber, his hazel eyes burning for me. I brush a crease from my dress and remind myself they were only like that because of the oil.
When I’m trailing my guards to the throne room, Preysee in tow, Dae fades away just before Liha slides into my shield.
“I will not stay long, just let me work on your protection from within your shield.” She sounds exhausted.
“I didn’t even know you could do that,” I say, my tone harsh.
Her sadness breaks through our bond. “I’ve always been protecting you from inside your shield or from your father’s. But since he’ll be departing, I’m leaving part of me in it to protect you while I am away. It’s not permanent but will hold for a time.”
“You will not leave part of yourself.” It sounds like something that will permanently weaken her.
“Your father’s spirit will tear you to shreds if I do not keep her from seeing your soul.”
Her. His spirit is a goddess. We pass the ballroom and I sense Liha”s stubbornness through our bond. She”ll leave her protection whether I allow it or not, so my mind returns to my father. I want to ask which goddess has her claws in him, but part of me just . . . can’t.
“Why would she want my soul?”
“Why, Liha?”
She sighs, “Your father wished to tell you, but she hardly leaves his side anymore, and she can’t know, not before your actualization.”
“My what?”
Her warm pocket of air nudges me, softer—weaker—than days ago. “When you are alone, go to the book Soriah left. It will tell you of one side of your lineage. Your father left it there for you in case he—”
She takes a deep breath. “In case she consumes him. Every second I’m not with you, I’m with him, staving off the inevitable. He’s losing the battle, but he thinks there’s someone in the Tatum realm that can—”
“Nizzara.” My father’s voice booms as we enter the ballroom through giant black doors. He’s on his throne eyeing the two Jaxelli warriors—Solis, the redhead, and a woman with a spray of freckles on her cheeks—that are today’s collateral. He must’ve made a trip back from his business just for this.
Lekk stands below the dais, appearing as comfortable as a man awaiting execution.
Halix stands behind Father, wearing Zarr infantry armor that hides the gray swirls on her skin.
Father’s eyes are lucid as they find mine, not the hard things I’m so used to. The corner of his lip twitches, the only tell he’s ever had. The last time I saw it was when I won my level five dueler ranking.
Lekk clears his throat and pointedly keeps his fiery gaze away from my plunging neckline.
I want to turn around and walk out from the insult.
“Give him a chance,” Liha whispers. Is she whispering? Or is her voice just softer? “Your father is giving you a gift; you just might not see it yet.”
Her presence is so familiar and safe, but she lied to me for ten years. And I’m hurt.
“Are you done with my shield?” I say.
“What about translating?”
“I’ll figure it out on my own.”
“Nizzara—”
“I need space, Liha.”
There’s a long pause before she says, “I’ll go. Just be wary of other spirits. Learn from your father.”
My eyes snap back to the throne and father’s entire face is different, his gaze like black steel. I realize I’ve been dealing with his spirit for a long time.
“I’ll leave now,” she says, leaving her protection with me.
My father flicks his hand toward Lekk. “You are free to roam, but do not keep my daughter long. She has a tournament to train for.”
The amount of normalcy in his voice is unsettling, and I think that’s why I ignored the signs.
Preysee follows, as our chaperone, as I lead Lekk out to the grounds. The wind is mild, nothing but a small breeze, and it reminds me of Dae as it tickles past my cheeks.
We walk in silence to a black fountain with flowers and birds carved into the marble, marking the beginning of the stone gardens.
Lekk peers into the ice frozen at the bottom, spouting something off in his own language.
The only thing I can do is stand here like a mute idiot.
A deep voice trickles across my skin. “He said you look pretty. Although, he’s remembering how last time you had freckles . . .” Dae’s cool air brushes around me.
I can’t respond to Dae without speaking out loud, so I raise an eyebrow at him, silently asking him to help me out here.
Dae’s midnight laugh brushes my ear and something inside my core heats at the sound.
“You could just allow me into your shield, and then we could have all sorts of secret conversations.”
I fold my arms and shake my head. Lekk’s tired-looking eyes are distracted by the stone statues and mazes.
“Well, I hate to break it to you, but whatever your little pink friend did to your caster’s shield has silenced your desires. I can’t hear what you want to say unless you say it out loud.”
I roll my eyes and wave Preysee over. “I’m going to say random things to you, and I need you to nod and play along, okay?”
She dips her chin, her eyes never leaving the strange red markings that glow on Lekk’s chest.
I utter what I wish to say to Preysee, so Lekk doesn’t think I’m talking to myself, and Dae, with no small amount of smugness, translates.
“How do I know you won’t embarrass me?” I say to Preysee’s face.
“Guess you’ll just have to trust me, won’t you?”
“Don’t you dare embarrass me.” I glare at him as he swirls behind Preysee’s dutifully neutral expression as she nods.
He laughs.
“I asked you two questions last time,” I say to Lekk, using Dae’s translations. “Do you mind if I ask two again?”
Lekk shakes his head as if trying to keep himself awake then says, “Ask your questions, Daughter of Zarr.” Dae interprets.
I’m going to have to drag this betrothal out until the King’s Final Duel, six weeks from now, because I can’t have a wedding before I can win the bestowment. Their matehoods are sacred. According to my book, they only mate once in their life. I would not defile that by annulling our marriage.
A thought enters my mind. The Jaxelli value humility and reservation. Maybe if I am too forward, he’ll decline the betrothal on his own.
“Have you ever kissed anyone?” I ask him.
“Don’t tell me you have a thing for the nightlight just because he has glowing muscles,” Dae purrs beside me, his cold blending into the outside air like a draft of icy wind.
I shoot him a sideways glance and tell Preysee to shut up.
He laughs then says, “Well, if you are into Nightlight, you’re wearing the right dress.” His velvet voice brushes my neck. “The Jaxelli women usually cover their bosom, and you have him squirming with the desire to stare.”
I rein in my grin, because I can sense Dae’s agitation about it. Lekk half-laughs, half-winces. “No, I have not kissed anyone.”
My eyes go wide, and I have to mutter my reply to Preysee, who’s taking this very well. “You have never kissed anyone? In two hundred years?” I repeat Dae’s translation.
I’ve read about their strange ways of mating, but not even kissing?
Lekk offers a tired smile. “Our first hundred years of life are spent mastering our gifts.” He shrugs his wide, defined shoulders. “And our lifespans are so long, it’s like you waiting until you’re sixteen before the desire hits, and even then, kissing is usually reserved for a chosen mate.”
I take a few steps to the opposite side of the fountain until I’m facing Lekk and bend over its edge to wipe the snow off a carved lush flower. Lekk’s breath hitches.
“So, you are allowed to kiss outside of a matehood?” I say, my eyes pointedly on the stone petals.
“You are such a cruel little beast to make him squirm this way,” Dae whispers behind me, a rugged edge in his voice.
Lekk’s throat bobs and his eyes dart away from my chest. “Technically, yes, but it’s . . . frowned upon.”
“Tell me, Lekk,” I say, going for my real question. The question that will decide whether I give this betrothal an ounce of consideration. “You are here because my father promised to help you reclaim your homeland in Xoshbesh,” I say, walking back around the fountain until I”m face to face with Lekk, Preysee moving with me. “What if I ask for your help in my own war?”
His brows shoot up.
“Theoretically, of course.”
“What kind of theoretical war?” Lekk says, narrowing his eyes.
I shrug. “None. I’m just asking. If there was a cause that was important to me, would you fight a war by my side?”
The muscles in his jaw flex. “We are a peaceful people who’ve been at war for longer than you’ve been alive. First against the dwarf witches who pine for our gifts, and then a second war against our own Dark Jaxelli Warriors who betrayed us. We lost half of our Light Warriors and our home nineteen years ago. We’ve been living as refugees ever since. If you were my mate, I would fight any threat that came against you to my death. I would fight to defend you.” His entire body tenses. “But I would not start another war when my people are still trying to survive the last one.”
I hide the pang of disappointment from showing on my face. Maybe if Lekk’s answer was different, I’d give this union a chance. Because I will be freeing the bondslaves, and it will be messy.
“What is keeping you from accepting this union?” I finally ask. I need to know so I can exploit it.
He shakes his head. “That’s three questions,” he says, and I can’t tell if the red around his eyes is from fatigue or the fire-like energy that runs over every inch of his rolling musculature.
“Bite your lip,” Dae says as he paces behind Lekk. “Or make that one face you do all the time.”
I tilt my head around Lekk’s shoulder, shooting Dae a questioning look.
“He wants to jump your bones, okay. Bite that bottom lip of yours.” He folds his arms, a movement of swirling air with a grumpy tone. “He’ll talk.”
I look back to Lekk, whose eyes keep finding my breasts. I touch his arm and bite my lip. “I want to get to know you more, that’s all,” I say.
The swirling glyphs on his chest plunge into a deep, deep red.
It is a nice chest.