Chapter 68
I’ve been locked in my room for ten days, with a headache courtesy of Wala and her pathways.
I’ve concluded two terrible things.
The King of Kings is alive.
But he won’t be for long.
Lekk and his two warriors, Korin and Solis, arrive after I’m cleaned up from the duel. Halix must’ve been briefed on the protocol, because she instructs his warriors to remain at her side. Since she’s been covered head to toe in infantry armor, her swirling light is hidden, and she effectively passes as Zarr.
Lekk’s hostility when he first asked about Father’s past alliance with the Dark Jaxelli makes me wonder what deeper motives Father has for this betrothal.
Dae is cool inside my shield, but when Lekk falls in step beside me, I feel the irritation and jealousy leaking from him through our bond.
I lean my head into his dark-velvet presence. “I do not belong to him.”
He runs a dark, but invisible, tendril along my cheek. “In that dress, with your hair down, he desires you to.”
Lekk speaks and Dae translates.
“I’ve come to accept your offer of betrothal.” Dae’s voice is stiff inside my mind.
I freeze where I’m at in the hall, and Lekk stops too. His face is a mash of longing and torture and duty, but his eyes fall to my lips and stay there.
No.
I was supposed to have time to win the tournament and terminate the betrothal before he decided.
Lekk tilts his head, taking in my span of emotions, no doubt.
Dae’s heartbreak seeps through our bond, but he’s not leaving. He’s staying in my shield, where I know he’ll stay until he’s dragged back to Baratrum.
Baratrum because he won’t take my soul—even if I hand it to him. I know he’d choose Baratrum.
“I decline.”
“Nizzara. I am not translating that for you.”
“Yes. You will.”
“He is good. I see his soul, his memories, his desires. He will keep you safer than any Zarr infantry or Zem nobleman. He can give you a life.” His voice breaks. “He can give you children, which you are strong enough to bear.”
“I decline. Translate it.”
“I will not let you throw the opportunity away so quickly.” Dae gives me a translation that means something along the lines of, I will consider, but I don’t say it.
I straighten my shoulders and speak directly to Lekk with the only word of their language I remember, “No.”
Lekk’s face softens, as if he understands how this situation is hard for both of us, and says, “Nizzara, I offer my matehood to you. I offer my sword, my loyalty, and my future. I will be at your side until the day my energy returns to the earth. I will protect you, comfort you, and stand beside you through every hardship and trial you face. I promise to serve you, respect you, and behold you as my equal.”
Tears prick my eyes as I back away from him, suddenly feeling trapped, like the walls are moving in.
“Nizzara,” Dae whispers. His spirit is at my back, nudging me toward Lekk.
“No,” I say, meeting Lekk’s gaze, hoping he can sense my apology when I turn my back to him, leaving him there with a look of shock and relief on his face.
My steps grow faster and faster, until I’m running. I need to get away from the constant eyes of my guards, away from Lekk’s beautiful proposal that I just declined.
My father will punish me if he returns, but I don’t care. When I turn the corner, eclipsing me from my guards and Preysee who are scrambling to catch up, Dae materializes, and faster than I can react, shoves me into a dark room, locks the door, and pins me against the wall.
“What are you doing?” he growls. “He is the best betrothal you could ask for.”
“I can’t accept it,” I say.
His emotions drown me through our bond. Frustration, relief, anger, relief. “Why? Because you are so spiteful, you’d decline a future—”
“Because I belong to someone else.” My eyes begin to adjust, and I make out those hazel irises in front of me as I touch his face. “And I will not betray him.”
He bends his head down to rest on mine. “Nizzara,” he pleads, squeezing his eyes shut. “I have no future to give you. You cannot choose me.” His anguish and longing rush into the dark room like an all-consuming flood.
I take his face in both hands. “You cannot tell me who I choose, lowly deathwalker.”
His hands sink into my hair and he’s kissing me, deep and urgent. Waves of his power—his emotions—crash into me. I crash right back into him, taking every second I have with him.
He hoists me up, and I wrap my legs around him.
He groans and pins me harder against the wall, kissing me like there will be no tomorrow.
His hand finds my leg and runs up beneath my dress, setting me on fire—the icy, electrical, zapping kind that always comes with him.
I want him here.
I want him now.
When I flick open the top button on his tunic, he breaks the kiss, pain on his face. “Nizzara—”
A commotion of yelling comes from the hall, and Dae jets back into spirit.
I straighten my dress and step out to a fight that had broken out in my absence.
“That flush on your cheeks would’ve been my undoing two seconds ago. Good thing Brunar is punctual.”
I inform Brunar that Lekk did nothing wrong, even though Lekk is the one holding Brunar by the chest of his uniform.
“I will not go through with the betrothal,” I snap at Dae, because I feel his fear and regret over our kiss.
“You might change your mind after I’m gone,” he says.
I level my gaze at him, to his dark outline standing behind Brunar. “I won’t.”