Chapter 40 Aleksandr #2
I wanted her any way I could have her. I suspected I knew what she needed, but if I interrupted now, she’d never voice it herself. And I needed her to, or I’d never be comfortable taking control.
She took a shuddering breath. “Can we do this on the couch, maybe? I’m beyond uncomfortable with all of you on your knees like this.”
The three of us sprang to our feet.
“I don’t forgive you,” she said softly. “We’re not together. I just—we all want this, and we’re adults, and it doesn’t have to mean anything more than that.”
“Eva—” Tristan’s voice broke.
“Those are my terms, take it or leave it. It’s what I want.”
She was protecting herself, building walls, trying to take what she wanted while keeping her heart safe.
And fuck, I couldn’t blame her, not after what we’d done.
Cole’s expression showed his devastation. Tristan’s too.
“Okay,” I said quietly, and her eyes widened. I wasn’t going to say no to Eva, even if it broke my heart to do this.
Tristan scooped her up into his arms and settled her onto his lap, her calves draped over Cole’s thighs. I sat on the other side of Cole, frowned at her bare feet, then snatched a blanket off the other couch and spread it over her.
We’d talked a little bit about a safeword, about letting me take control, but this was different, heavier.
“You know I’m a Dom,” I began. “I take pleasure from control—total control. I’m relatively sure Cole and Tristan are dominant as well, although they seem to know fuck all about taking care of a sub.” I glared at the two of them until the weight of my stare made them both squirm.
“They didn’t do so bad,” Eva said with a slight smile.
“I did some research on the Internet,” she continued, her cheeks flushing that adorable pink that made me want to bend her over the couch and remind her who she belonged to at the same time.
“In a real BDSM relationship, the two parties—” her eyes cut to Cole and Tristan— “all of the parties have to negotiate and consent to the scene.”
She smoothed her hands down over her borrowed sweatpants. “And the sub has all the power, right? Because she—they—can end the scene whenever they want.”
“It’s a little bit more complex than that,” I answered. “Yes, you can end the scene whenever you want. Your trust is a gift, and a good Dom won’t abuse it. But power ebbs and flows—it’s more like a dance than an absolute.
“Let’s set some ground rules for tonight, and then we can figure out the rest of this as we go along,” I continued quietly, not quite willing to make this as meaningless as Eva wanted. “Are you two familiar with the stoplight system?”
Not surprisingly, Tristan nodded. Cole shook his head.
“It’s a way of checking in,” I continued. “Red means stop. Full stop. Scene ends. Aftercare for everyone involved, especially Eva. Yellow means slow down. We’ll check in, pause if we need to, try something different. And green means go. Full speed ahead.”
Eva nodded, her eyes wide. I loved that she’d dropped that mask of composure. Her trust was a fucking gift, and I intended to treasure it.
“We’re all going to check in with each other,” I said, eying Cole and Tristan severely. “Not just Eva. Do you understand?”
The two young men grinned widely. “Sure thing, Coach,” Tristan said, saluting me sarcastically.
“Fuck you,” I snarled before I could stop myself, aghast I’d said something like that to a student.
Tristan’s smile was slow and sly. “Bet.”
“And we’re not going to push each other. Nobody fucking hurts Eva.”
“Unless I want to be hurt,” she piped up, eyes sparkling.
“Brat,” I teased. “Are you looking for a punishment?”
She bit her lip. Oh, fuck, yes, Eva. Play with us. You’re going to wrap us around your gorgeous little fingers without even trying.
“Maybe we should punish our sweet Eva for keeping her delicious pussy from us for so long,” Cole murmured.
Eva swallowed hard, and I could see her mind working through what doing this would mean, what it would change. “I’m not ready to forgive you,” she repeated.
Cole met her eyes, clear and steady. “I know.”
“This is sex, not a relationship,” she continued. I didn’t call her on the lie.
Tristan scrubbed his face. “Stop saying that.”
“Yellow,” Eva snapped.
Tristan’s eyes flew to hers, but his expression was furious. “I don’t want meaningless sex with you,” he snarled. “I don’t want to worship you and show you exactly how much you mean to me while you pretend it doesn’t mean shit.”
Eva swallowed hard, her expression anguished. “This was a terrible idea,” she whispered. “I can’t—”
“How about this,” Cole said, wrapping one arm around Tristan. “We’ll take what you’re offering, but we’re going to do it on our terms.”
“What does that mean?”
“We’ll make you forget, but we’re not going to fuck you.”
“That’s not—” Confusion and frustration warred on her face. “That’s not what I want.”
“Too bad,” Cole said roughly. “Our rules tonight, sparrow. You have a safeword. Use it if you need it.”
Eva’s breathing sped up, her pupils dilating. “You’re being ridiculous.”
“No, we’re being honest,” Cole snapped, “unlike you.”
She flinched.
“You want us,” I said gently. “This isn’t meaningless to you either. You can lie to yourself all you want, but there’s a limit to how willing I am to help you do it.”
“I—” She swallowed hard. “Fine. Whatever. Do whatever you want.”
My answering smile was cruel. “We will.”
She shivered.
“Bedroom. Now.”