Chapter 13
WYLDER
Neo doesn’t appear in my bed that night.
In fact, I don’t see him at all once we arrive back home. Dinner was…different, and not because of the venue. It was seventies-themed, with chrome-edged counters and bold colors, neon signs flickering on the walls. They even had servers on roller skates bringing our food to us.
Seemed like a hazard, but no more than Neo staring at me intently as I sat across from him.
He didn’t sit next to me in the booth. It bothered me. Almost as much as the long silence that stretched between us. Gone were his probing questions, his insistence that I reveal parts of myself that no one has seen before.
It should have been a relief.
But it wasn’t. Not when I could tell there was something bothering him.
Something he was keeping from me.
And here he is the next morning, too far away once again.
“Why are you sitting over there?” I ask. There are several feet between our chairs. I can’t even reach out and touch him.
He doesn’t so much as glance my way. “I’m not. I’m sitting a normal distance away.”
I push my glasses up my nose. “No, you’re usually right on top of me.”
“You should be happy I’m not. You’re always complaining about me invading your space.”
My mind whirls. Did I do something wrong last night on our date?
He seemed in good spirits until our walk.
Something changed during the meal, or perhaps just before.
He was subdued during the car ride home, too.
After the disastrous helicopter ride, I arranged to have a limo waiting for us. Neo was grateful, but quiet.
So quiet.
Even so, I half expected him to follow me to my room after we arrived home, but instead, he gave me a quick wave and ran off.
Something happened, and I don’t know what.
My eye twitches. I hate not knowing what’s wrong, not knowing what I did to upset someone. My skin feels too tight and my brain starts to hurt. I just want him to lay it out, to tell me exactly what I did so I can fix it. I can’t fix it if I don’t know what I broke in the first place.
I continue to stare at Neo. Eventually, he snaps. “What? Is there something on my face?”
His head doesn’t turn. I hate that he’s not looking at me. But not as much as I hate how my voice is soft and low. Almost fucking needy. “Why won’t you look at me? Did I do something wrong?”
He stops clacking on the keyboard and turns his gaze toward me. “No, you didn’t do anything wrong.”
I blink at the gaping space between us.
He sighs loudly and then stands up, scraping the chair toward me and plopping down. He’s closer, but not close enough.
“Better?”
No. Not really. But I drag my stare away as Dotty appears with our coffee delivery. She glowers at me, and I shrink back, unsure if she can feel the distance between Neo and me. Maybe he told her something I don’t know. Maybe she knows why he’s upset.
She sets the food and drinks down, offering Neo a small smile before glowering at me again.
I stand up abruptly and wave toward the office door.
“I need to speak to you,” I tell her, making Neo glance up. He’s wearing another ridiculously short shirt, one that says Certified Cutie. It shows off his thin waist and his little belly button.
He is cute.
He is certified.
I hate that I notice.
“Why do you need to speak to her?” Neo asks. This is the most he’s spoken to me all morning. He didn’t speak when he ordered my coffee and pastry, only nodded and shook his head when he needed to give me a response.
I hate that my chest swells at his attention.
It’s making me weak, and yet I’m too fucking confused right now to care.
I don’t answer him. I can’t. The monster is too close to the surface. If I give Neo any more attention, it’ll end with me throwing him over my shoulder again, marching him to my room, locking the door, and refusing to let him leave until he tells me what’s wrong.
That behavior might work for my brothers, but not me. I’m the heir. There’s an expected standard.
Behaving like a Neanderthal falls short of that.
“Are you firing me?” Dotty asks, and I shake my head, walking at a clipped pace toward the door.
“I will speak to you in private,” I tell her, and I swear I feel something wet hit my neck. Not sure what that is, but I think she might have sprayed me with vinegar.
As the door closes behind us, I turn to face the aging housekeeper. Her graying hair is pulled back in a bun, and she has an apron on, a second spray bottle stuffed into one of the pockets. I think this one is just for me. To antagonize me whenever I’m around.
“Has Neo said anything to you?” I ask, and she purses her lips, staring at me.
It seems she wants to keep a secret. Either that or she has no idea what I’m talking about.
I try again. “I’d like to know if he confided in you. About us.”
“Even if he did, I’d say nothing.”
I sigh. “Have you no loyalty to me, to this family?”
Her lips curl up, and I see the first genuine smile light up her face. “Unless you’re firing me, I’m going back to work.” She hesitates, and then adds, “Sir.”
It’s mocking. She knows she’s never said that to me in my life. Probably has something to do with cleaning up my messes when I was a child. When I don’t stop her, she turns and walks away, leaving me to stare at the office door, dreading having to go back in and figure out what’s wrong.
I push my way inside, striding to my seat and lowering myself into it. Neo doesn’t even look at me, just continues to type, answering emails and murmuring to himself.
He’s moved his chair farther away again, and now there’s a headache knocking at the back of my skull.
My monster is unhappy with this turn of events. It was quite satiated when we were on our date, happy to have him tucked into me, to have his hand in mine. Now it’s like Neo’s a stranger.
Ask him again. Ask him what’s wrong.
I refuse, letting the uncomfortable silence sink between us until I can’t stand it any longer.
Before lunch, I push myself to my feet and wander to the office door, hoping Neo will comment on my abrupt departure, but I hear nothing as I step into the hallway.
I need some fresh air, to touch some grass. If Neo says nothing is wrong, then nothing is. And yet I can’t help the niggling feeling in the back of my mind that tells me something is definitely not right.
You did something wrong. Fix it.
Fix it.
I step outside and wander the expansive property, my hands tucked into my pockets, my head down. I can hear the trickle of the fountains in the distance, can hear the sound of the rain tapping on the leaves of the trees.
And I can also hear the soft beat of music floating through the air.
I follow it, moving toward a small shed we keep on the property, one I assumed was for gardening tools. But when I pull the door open, I see a shirtless Samson inside, his hips rocking back and forth, his eyes closed, his hands in the air, each holding an axe.
He’s off beat entirely. Even someone as bad at dancing as I am knows this, but he looks like he’s enjoying it. Whatever it is he’s doing.
The squeak of the door hinge has him freezing and then lunging toward me. Eyes wild, his axes drop to the ground, and a dagger appears from nowhere. I’m shoved up against the rickety wooden wall before I can say anything, and when he realizes it’s me, he scowls.
“Knock before interrupting the artistic process,” he murmurs, letting the dagger fall slightly, but not before nicking me. I can feel a sliver of pain and the trickle of blood, but it goes ignored. “And why the fucking glasses? Thought you magically cured your bad eyesight.”
“I find them easier to take than contacts some days.” That’s why. It has nothing to do with Neo and how he likes the way they make my face look. “I had no idea you were here. Had no idea you were…dancing?”
The way my voice lilts up at the end has him flipping me off. “I know I’m not the best, but yeah, I’m dancing. Gonna practice until I get it right.”
My lips twitch at his red cheeks, the beads of sweat collecting on his forehead. “I had no idea you liked to dance like this.”
“I didn’t either. Until I tried it.” He turns the music down and grabs a towel, mopping at his forehead. “Now I realize I do like it, and now I’m determined to be a professional.”
“With the axes?”
“Yeah, with the fucking axes.”
I bite back a smile. “You think you can do that with just practice?”
“Hell yeah. I’m a killer with all the training Dad put us through. I can fucking learn to move in time with a beat.”
I stare at the sincerity on his face. “Yeah, I think that’s a great goal, Samson.”
“Fuck off. Why are you here?”
The temporary distraction of Samson moving out of time with a beat dissipates. Now I’m back to thinking about Neo and what I did to upset him. “I just needed some fresh air.”
He snorts and glowers at me. “Why? You never need fresh air. You actually hate the air.”
“I don’t hate air. I need it to live.”
“And you despise that you do. I remember you telling me you’d love to live on Mars. Just for the principle of it. Said you hated having to be beholden to oxygen.”
I blink at him, and he blinks back before tossing the damp rag he was just swiping across his chest at me. I shudder as it hits my arm and falls to the floor.
I shouldn’t tell him, but then again, Samson is probably the least likely to let something slip. He’s a grump but loyal.
“It’s Neo.”
Samson sighs. “Fuck. I like him. It’ll be hard to kill him.”
I shake my head and pinch my nose. “I don’t want anyone to kill him. I just… He’s acting funny after our date.”
“You had a date?” he asks, grabbing a bottle of whiskey and taking a long sip. It’s early in the day, but I don’t comment. If anything, I’m more likely to ask for a swig. Might help me face Neo again. “Since when?”
“Since he asked The Firm for one.”
His lips quirk. “He went to The Firm to ask you for a date?”
“Yes.”
“Fuck,” he says with a hoarse laugh. “I knew I liked that little shit.”
I rub the back of my neck. “I…like him too, but somehow, during our date, I upset him.”
It’s the first time I’ve admitted liking Neo, even to myself. But I’m not a fool, despite what my siblings might believe. It doesn’t matter that I thought I was straight or that Neo drives me up the fucking wall.
I like him, and he’s upset. I have to fix it. I hate that I can’t just fucking fix it.
“Where did you go?” He sits down on the floor and spreads his legs. I debate sitting with him and then decide against it. I won’t be putting my thousand-dollar suit on the dirty floor.
“A retro arcade and then a seventies diner.”
“Fuck off,” he says with another laugh, and then holds up the whiskey for me to drink.
I grab it and take a long swig. It burns on the way down. “I’m not lying. That’s what we did. And I thought it went well, but now he’s ignoring me.”
“Sounds like you should talk about it with him.”
He shudders, and so do I. Being the eldest, we’re the ones Father worked the most on. Communication isn’t a strong suit for either of us.
“I attempted to, but he wouldn’t answer me.”
“See, this is why I hate relationships. So much fucking work and stress.”
“It’s not a relationship. It’s just…a thing between two consenting adults.”
He kicks at my feet, and I step on his toes.
“You admitted to liking him. Coming from you, that’s practically a love declaration. Face it. It’s a relationship.”
“It’s not,” I say, feeling my heart constrict. “I do like him, it’s just…I’m confused.”
“Join the club,” he says as I hand the whiskey back to him. He takes several long pulls and then staggers to his feet. “I swear I’m confused most days, and I’m not interested in anyone. I’ll be fucked if someone actually captures my attention.”
I cock my head. “Do you think that might happen? It’s not as fun as it sounds.”
“Fuck knows. Maybe you should try to dance it off. Makes me feel better.”
I shake my head, feeling slightly tipsy from the encounter. “I don’t dance.”
“That’s what I said, and look at me now.
” He turns the music up, and the beat thumps around me.
It’s far too loud, and if I could stand it, I’d stay and watch Samson make a fool of himself, but there’s no way I can put up with it for long.
Besides, he doesn’t allow me the pleasure.
He shoves me out the door and closes it, leaving me to stand in the fresh air, trying to screw my head on straight.
There’s no point worrying about what Samson said, what he implied about Neo and me. No, it’s more important that I get to the bottom of what happened to make Neo so cold and distant. And then I can get to work on fixing it.