Chapter 6
“Shit! Is everything okay?” I drop the grocery bags I’m carrying when I see Alicia sitting on the floor, between Greaser’s legs, deep breathing, and clutching her belly.
“I’m fine.” She starts to giggle, and when Greaser stands up and offers her his hand, she takes it and drags herself up.
“Just doin’ some breathing exercises; practising for the big day.” He pats her tummy proudly, then picks up the remote to turn off the TV.
“I found a great channel on YouTube,” he tells me, looking all smug and fuckin’ clever as he moves toward the refrigerator and helps himself to a beer.
“Ain’t that something you and me should be working on?
” I move toward Alicia, picking the remote back up and flicking the TV back on so I can see this channel for myself.
I’ve been worrying ever since she asked me to be her birthing partner that I’ll suck at it.
I’m happy to watch anything that’ll help.
“Ain’t you told him yet?” Greaser sniggers, hanging his arm around Alicia's shoulder and pulling her into him. “Your services are no longer required. Uncle Greaser’s steppin’ in and letting you off the hook.
” I can see how much satisfaction he’s getting outta breaking the news, and I switch my stare to Alicia, wondering what the hell he’s talking about.
She can’t even look at me; her eyes just drop to the floor.
“We figured it was best for her to have someone a little more invested at her side when my niece decides she’s ready to arrive.
Someone more readily available.” His eyebrows knit together, and I clench my fists to stop myself from throwing them at him.
“Vike, I–”
“Don’t worry bout it, darlin’.” I interrupt whatever Alicia's gonna say, shaking my head and storming to my room before I rip the fucker’s head off his shoulders.
“Now, how about we try some of those labour positions?” I hear him offer, as I kick my door shut and leave them to it.
“Vike.” I’m staring at the ceiling, trying to talk myself outta killing one of my club brothers when she softly knocks on my bedroom door.
“Vike, please don’t ignore me. I need to talk to you.” She sounds sad, and although I really don’t wanna face her while I’m this angry, I get up and open the door.
“What d’ya want?” I ask, swallowing the lump in my throat when I see how beautiful she looks. She’s given up trying to hide that pretty, round tummy and is wearing a cropped top with a pair of stretchy shorts.
“I want to talk about what happened earlier; the way Greaser explained it–”
“Alicia, it’s your baby, and your body; you should have whoever you want. Don’t feel bad for wanting him.” The words taste like acid as they leave my mouth.
“He’s going to be her uncle. I guess it makes sense, and I figured you’d be happy.”
“Wait…what? Why the hell would you think that?” I question her, starting to get even fuckin’ angrier.
“Come on, Vike, do you think I’m stupid?
” She barges past me and lowers herself to sit on the corner of my bed.
“You’ve been avoiding me all week. I’ve hardly seen you.
And when I do get the opportunity to be in the same room as you, you immediately leave it.
” She calls me out, making me realize I only have myself to blame.
“I’m sorry.” I move to sit beside her, taking her hand in mine and trying to figure out what I should say. “I’m not trying to avoid you, Alicia.”
“You could have fooled me.” She huffs a laugh. “Look, Vike, if you're here out of obligation to my brother, you don’t need to be. I have help and support, I don’t need you to dedicate your life to us. Greaser asked if he could be there at the birth; it just makes more sense.”
“I’m not here out of obligation, Alicia,” I tell her, trying to hold the rage back from my words.
“Then why are you here?” She looks up at me with wide, curious eyes. And when I feel the picture of her brother, and my best friend, glaring at me from the nightstand behind us, I glance over my shoulder and remind myself why I can’t tell her the truth.
“We’re friends, Alicia, and friends take care of each other.”
Her shoulders sag as she nods her head acceptingly.
“I understand why you want Greaser there, but if you change your mind, I’ll be there in a heartbeat.
” I bring her hand up to my lips and kiss her knuckles, needing her to know that I’m gonna be here for her.
Yeah, I’m wounded that she’s picked him over me, but I won’t make her suffer for it.
“You fancy pizza?” she asks with a half smile.
“I’m guessing you do?”
“Hey, I have no control over my appetite these days.” She laughs, stroking her tummy affectionately as she stands back up.
“I’ll order us one, now.” I reach across to grab my phone from where it rests beside Saul’s picture.
“Vike.” She keeps hold of my hand. “Thanks.”
“What for?” I get the sense she’s not talking about pizza anymore.
“For always understanding.” She smiles, kissing my hand the same way I kissed hers before releasing me and stepping back out into the hall.
“Stop!” I hear her crying out from her room, and I leap outta bed, ripping the door open so I can get to her. My heart thumps as I make my way toward her room. I’m prepared to fuckin’ kill whoever it is that's in there trying to hurt her.
“Please, don’t…please.” I barge inside her room, standing static when I find her alone, thrashing on the bed and dripping with sweat.
“Alicia. Alicia, darlin’, wake up.” I rush to her, resting on the bed beside her, gently trying to shake her awake and disrupt her nightmare.
“Stop!” she screams out again, lashing out and clawing at my face. She’s trying so hard to push me away, but I hold her firm.
“Alicia, you're gonna hurt yourself. Stop. You’re just dreaming. It’s me, Vike. Come back to me,” I beg, hating seeing her like this, so scared and outta control.
“Vike.” She suddenly snaps out of it, whispering my name so sweetly, then grabbing hold of my shoulders and clinging to me tight.
“You were just dreamin’,” I whisper, stroking her sticky hair with my hand.
She looks up at me and instantly drags me down to her lips, kissing me fiercely and clinging to me like she’s scared the world is gonna throw her off.
This time, I don’t pull away. This time, I kiss her the way I should have done before.
The way I’ve been wanting to for so fuckin’ long.
“Please, don’t leave me,” she whispers against my lips, her nails digging into the bare skin on my shoulders, desperately.
“I’m not leaving,” I promise, wiping the damp hair off her cheeks and cradling her face in one of my hands.
“I like it when you touch me.” She smiles before kissing me again, and when she takes hold of my wrist and guides the hand I have on her face down to rest on her stomach, I do nothing to stop her.
“She likes it too,” she tells me. “We both need you so much, Vike. Please, stop being so distant.” She pulls her head away from mine, and when I see that she’s crying, I know there's nothing I wouldn’t do to fix it.
“I’m sorry.” I roll my palm over her round belly until her breathing calms and her eyes close peacefully. She’s sound asleep again; her nightmare is over, and this should be my cue to leave.
Staying here, being this close, is all such a temptation.
Kissing her sure didn’t feel wrong. It felt like the only fuckin’ right thing I’ve done in a real long time.
I can’t think about what Saul would think right here in this moment.
I promised Alicia I’d stay, and stay is exactly what I’m gonna do.
Carefully, I get off the bed, lift the covers, and slide under them beside her.
Resting my palm back on her tummy, I make more of those soothing circles over her skin, knowing that it's giving her comfort by the adorable hums she’s making in her sleep.
“Thank you, Vike,” she whispers, tucking her head into my chest and curling her body into mine.
“Anytime, darlin',” I answer, kissing the top of her head and taking a long, relieved breath of my own. “Anytime.”