Chapter 3.2
As the carriage travelled through the surrroundings of her childhood, Elizabeth sighed, removed her bonnet, and leaned her head on her husband’s shoulder. Her fingers entwined with his while he kissed the top of her head.
“Netherfield looks lovely, even in bad weather,” she said, glancing outside “It is about a year now since Jane fell ill and we had to stay with the Bingleys for a few days. And with you.”
“Yes. What a year this has been—seems like a lifetime,” he admitted. “I remember when you arrived that morning after walking three miles through muddy fields.”
“I remember that too. The way you looked at me when we met made me equally ashamed and angry. You seemed horrified, and your gaze judged my appearance harshly. I dare not ask what was in your mind at that moment.”
He laughed. “You could not be farther from the truth, my love. But yes, you are wise not to ask what was in my mind then. It would give you reason to be embarrassed.”
“What do you mean?”
He kissed her hair and smiled mischievously. “Your cheeks were red, and your eyes were sparkling from the exercise. Your gown was so dirty that I could think of nothing else but to take it off and to warm you in my arms…and perhaps kiss you senseless.”
“Surely, you are teasing me. I am certain you thought of no such thing that day. During that time, you looked at me only to find a blemish.”
“Again, you could not be farther from the truth or more wrong, my dear Elizabeth.”
“If I were to believe your words, it would appear you had nothing but improper thoughts about me,” she said, one eyebrow rising in disbelief.
Darcy laughed again. “Not only improper thoughts. I also admired your brightness, your love of books, your affection for your sister, and your decided opinions. You were surely the most intriguing and admirable woman I had met until that moment. But many of my thoughts were improper, I admit. I began to desire you and to fantasize about you almost from the beginning of our acquaintance—long before I realised I was in love with you.”
“But…you were so distant, so haughty, so silent. Was everything you showed outside only a mask to conceal your true feelings?”
“Yes. During your stay at Netherfield, there was not a single hour I did not imagine how it would feel to embrace you, to kiss you, to touch you…and I tried to conceal my feelings…even from myself.”
“But how can that be, my dear sir? Did you not tell me once that disguise of every sort is your abhorrence?”
The moment she said the words, she regretted it. This was not the day to remember the most dreadful one of their acquaintance.
Yet, he only smiled. “I said many things I should not have during that proposal, my love. However, those words were true—in every circumstance except those related to you. The more true and deep and strong my love and admiration became, the harder I tried to hide it. That is why I must compensate by proving it to you every single moment for the rest of our lives.”
“There is no need to prove anything to me, my dear husband. Lately, I have learned to easily read the truth in your eyes, your frowns, and your little smiles. I have failed in the past, but no more. I shall also admit that, at that time, I did not know what passion and desire looked like. So how could I have seen them in your aloof expression?”
“You are right. And do you now know what passion and desire look like?”
“I most certainly do…you taught me.” She daringly lifted her face to meet his lips.
He stole a brief kiss then caressed her face tenderly. “There is so much more to learn, my beautiful wife, and I am eager to teach you. But you must help me behave properly during our journey, and that will be a difficult task.”
“I shall do my best. But I also learned that ‘properly’ might have different meanings, Mr. Darcy.”
“Since we are now married, ‘properly’ should mean whatever we want, Mrs. Darcy.”
“I agree. Therefore, you may behave in any way you like, Mr. Darcy,” she teased him.
It took only an instant for Darcy’s arms to close around her, and he lifted her onto his lap.
She was not surprised; they had done that before on their secluded walks.
Her hands encircled his neck, and her face tilted towards his.
They had waited for and craved such a moment for the last few days when they had not a single moment of privacy.
“I am starving for your lips, my love,” he whispered. His thumb brushed over the objects of his desire and parted them gently. “And I do not need to worry about your lips becoming swollen and red from my kisses. Nobody will see them.”
“True…” she replied weakly a moment before her mouth was sweetly captured in a desperate kiss, so much like yet so different from what she had experienced before.
His tenderness was soon replaced by possession, and his tongue daringly tasted her mouth, playing with hers.
His teeth tantalised her lips then bit them tenderly as though they were a tasty dessert.
“Your flavour is intoxicating,” he murmured, and then his moans replaced the words. He hastily unbuttoned her cloak without breaking the kiss.
“Let me know whether you are cold,” he said, as he removed her cloak and then slid the gown off her shoulders.
For a moment, a sensible thought crossed her mind, telling her there were footmen outside the carriage.
But his hungry mouth travelling along her throat made her forget anything but the tingling shivers that overwhelmed her senses.
She reclined in his embrace, and his kisses became more passionate.
Then her mouth was abandoned as he satiated his hunger by tasting and licking her face, neck, and shoulders.
He paused a moment upon the line of her cleavage before he looked into her eyes.
“My love, we have two more hours on the road. We should stop as I do not trust my discipline and self-control.”
She daringly held his gaze. "I know we should stop. But do you wish to?”
He was surprised. “You know my answer. Let me know what you wish, Mrs. Darcy.”
“We are alone in a carriage for the first time, and we are married. I do not know what I could or should expect, but I trust you will show me. And teach me.”
“Dear Lord, I shall lose my mind with you, my love,” he said, his eyes as black as the afternoon sky that, although it was not late, continued to darken.
As Elizabeth sat there—her gown around her shoulders, shivering both from cold and expectations, her hair in disorder, her lips red and wet—Darcy seemed undecided for a moment
Then he hastily put a blanket on the opposite bench, arranged a pillow, and helped Elizabeth lie down. She smiled and blushed, her hands tightly encircling his neck. He knelt by her side and placed soft kisses on her forehead and her sparkling eyes.
“The pillows were my idea, you know,” he confessed. “I said you might need to rest during the journey.”
“Did you lie, Mr. Darcy? Again? You, of all people,” she said, laughing.
“I did not, madam. You absolutely need to rest, but I am not sure I shall allow it. What are your wishes?”
“You cannot put the entire decision on me. But I confess that I am not at all tired. On the other hand, you, sir, cannot possibly travel the entire journey to London in such an uncomfortable position.” Elizabeth teased him daringly and blushed.
“I assure you I can travel in more uncomfortable positions than this as long as I am with you.”
He suddenly became completely serious, caressing her face with gentle fingers. “You cannot possibly know how happy you make me every single moment, Elizabeth.”
“Of course I do, my love. Your happiness cannot be different than mine.” She tenderly returned the kisses to his handsome face.
As heavy clouds obscured the daylight and rain fell on the carriage with greater power, it became colder, but they were protected both by the warmth of their tenderness and by the other’s nearness.
“You shiver, my dear,” he said. “This will not do. I cannot believe I am so thoughtless as to expose you to danger due to my selfish desires.”
She kissed his words away, barely whispering, “I am in no danger with you, but I do shiver because of you.”
Her hands cupped his face, and she resumed the kiss.
His tongue readily tantalised her lips, moved to her throat, and then gently bit her ear.
One hand touched a bare arm, ran over her ribs, and lingered on a breast. His fingers felt its firm curves then brushed slowly, tenderly, barely touching her.
She sighed, and his mouth returned to trap hers, covering her moans.
“It is good the rain is loud enough to cover other sounds,” he said hoarsely; then he groaned when he felt her teeth gently bite him back.
He broke the kiss briefly, aware that things might go too far, but her hands were tightly clasped around his neck. She seemed unwilling to separate, so he returned to her lips until their need for air became stronger than their hunger for each other.