18. Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Eighteen
Luciana
Aday goes by before I get word of Matteo.
“How is my husband?” I ask the nurse who comes to check on my wellbeing. “I haven’t been told anything.”
“I’ll check for you,” she responds in her warm voice. It’s the opposite of my father’s cold stare. He’s not happy I asked him to not kill Matteo. But it’s what I want and he can deal with it.
“Dad, you can go,” I say, leaning against the hospital bed. Being stuck in here for the past twenty-four hours has been stifling.
“I’m not leaving you until you’re out of this room. I need to make sure you’re fully all right. You had a bad infection, Luciana. It could come back at any moment.”
“For right now, I’m fine. I need some space.”
“I’m not going anywhere.”
I sigh. Once again, he’s doing what he wants for himself and not what’s best for me. All because he loves me too much. It’s selfish of him but can I fully blame him? I can’t stop thinking of Matteo. When you love someone, that love can make you go a little crazy.
The nurse returns a moment later. “He’s out of surgery and resting. For right now, you need to rest and can’t leave your room but if you’re still doing well by tomorrow, you can go see him. He’s in room 205.”
“He’s alive?” I whisper as my tears hit me.
“He’s alive,” she says with a kind smile.
Thank god. After what Dante did to him, I was so worried but he survived and I did to. It’s a miracle.
No. It’s thanks to Matteo. He got us out of there.
“You look… relieved,” Dad murmurs after the nurse leaves.
“Of course I am. My husband is alive. That’s a good thing.”
“Is it? It would have been better if he died. Then you wouldn’t have to be with him.”
“Daddy… he saved my life. Matteo isn’t a monster, like I once thought him to be. You have to understand that. I married him for peace and we have to stick with that. You can’t hurt him just because you’re not happy. I’m happy with him now. Shouldn’t that count for something?”
He hesitates. “I wish it did. But I still hate that you’re married to him. You were put into danger because of him.”
“Because of Matteo? This wasn’t Matteo’s doing. It was Dante. He came after us… because of me.” Shame hits me hard but I push it aside. I don’t have room for it right now.
“What do you mean? That can’t be true.”
“But it is true. I ran into Dante once before. I gave him Alexandra’s name as my own.
Turns out, he’s crazy. He killed her because he was upset she wasn’t me.
When he found out who I really am, he came for me and Matteo.
I’m the reason me and my husband were put in danger. I’m the reason my husband almost died.”
“No,” he says, taking my hand. “None of that is your fault. Dante is a madman.”
“But you still think Matteo is somehow to blame, don’t you?”
He sighs, shaking his head. “I can’t help it. I hate your husband, Luciana. I hate that you had to be sacrificed. I want to save you.”
“And you think killing my husband is saving me? The man who saved me from Dante? Dante could come for me again if Matteo is dead. Don’t you want me to be with a man who would put his own life on the line to save me? Isn’t that what any father would want?”
“It is,” he admits.
“Then let it go, Dad. I’m happy Matteo is alive.
When I’m feeling better, I’m going to go see him.
And he and I are going to make our marriage work.
I’ve been holding on to a lot of bad feelings.
A lot of guilt and shame I never needed to feel.
But after what Matteo and I went through…
I realize that everything I had felt was pointless.
Life is too short for me to waste it being miserable.
I’m going to choose to be happy no matter what.
I don’t care if something is socially acceptable anymore.
I don’t care if I’m not as proper. I just want to be happy and I want to be happy with my husband. ”
Tears well up in my father’s eyes and he cries right before me. It’s a rare sight. “Sweetheart, you sound so grown up.”
“That’s because I am.”
“I don’t want to lose you.”
“You’re not losing me,” I say with a smile. “I’ll always be your daughter. We’ll still see each other. That’s not going to change. So don’t worry. I’m fine, Dad. Isn’t this what you wanted for me? To be happy?”
“I wanted you to be safe.” His admission tells me everything. My father hasn’t cared for my happiness unless it suits him and what he wants. The sting that settles in my chest is too much.
I pull away from him. “I need some time alone. Please. Give that to me.”
He wipes at his tears and finally nods, walking out of the room. I feel like I can breathe again with him gone.
Now I just have to wait until I’m better enough to go see my husband.
Except, the longer I wait, the more antsy I become. I need to see Matteo now.
I force my body out of bed, even though it’s painful. The infection was mostly in my foot but it still spread to the rest of my body. I’m achy all over.
I use the crutches the nurse gave me for whenever I need to use the bathroom and hobble out of the room. The nurse on duty is busy looking at her computer and doesn’t notice me when I walk past. I’m going to find my husband.
Room 205 comes into view. We’re on the same floor. It’s fate.
I round the corner and enter into the room…
Only to see my father standing over Matteo with a pillow in his hands. Matteo is asleep, unaware of what’s about to happen.
I gasp when my father presses the pillow to Matteo’s face. My husband twitches. His body is fighting what my father is trying to do to him.
“Stop!” I scream.
My father jerks away from Matteo and drops the pillow. Matteo’s breathing returns to normal. He still hasn’t woken up yet.
A nurse comes running into the room. “What’s going on?” She looks between me and my father and Matteo. “Honey, you should be resting. You shouldn’t be in here.”
“I had to see my husband.” And it’s a good thing too because my father was about to murder him.
The nurse sighs. “I get it. But you really need your rest.”
“Just let me stay with him. Just for a moment. Please.”
A soft smile crosses her face and reaches her eyes. In my world full of fakeness, it’s nice to see a person who’s smile is genuine. “All right. For a moment. But then you need to go rest.” She nods at my father. “Is there a problem?”
“No,” I answer for him. The last thing I need is my father arrested. “No problem.”
She hesitates for a moment longer before leaving.
“What are you doing?” I ask my father in a low voice. It’s a tone I don’t think I’ve ever used before.
“Luciana… I…”
“You were trying to kill my husband after I told you not to. How could you? Can you not see that I’m happy with him?”
“Are you happy? Or are you just happy he saved your life? That doesn’t mean you’ll be happy with him forever. There will be days you will be miserable.”
“How can you know that? You don’t know what’s on my mind unless I tell you.”
He picks the pillow back up. “I cannot let you remain married to him.”
“I am not your little girl anymore. I am a grown woman. I am married. Accept it, Dad. Please.”
“I cannot.” The sneer on his face says everything.
“I cannot accept that you’re married to him.
I never accepted it. And now with your life on the line, I know you’re only safe with me.
I raised you for nineteen years and you were never put in this kind of danger.
But you’re married to Matteo for only a handful of weeks and some madman kidnaps you.
Tortures you. You are safer with me and I am making sure that happens. ”
“By killing my husband? By terminating peace? You’re only going to plunge us into a war by doing this. You know that. Dad, you have to let me go. You have to let me go.”
“I can’t!” he screams, making me jerk back. “I can’t let you go, Luciana. You are my daughter. I’m the one who raised you. No one else. You can’t expect me to just let you go like it’s nothing.”
“I know it’s not nothing, Dad. I know it’s not easy for you. But killing my husband is not the answer.”
“You never wanted to be married to him.”
“You’re right,” I answer as calmly as I can.
“I never did. But things have changed. My feelings for him have changed. I want him in my life now. Don’t take him from me.
Don’t put yourself at risk. Gabriel might kill you if you kill him.
Or one of Matteo’s men might come for you.
You know it. I don’t want you to die either.
So please, for both of our sakes, don’t kill my husband. Let the pillow go.”
He clings to the pillow like his life depends on it. A long tense moment.
Then he sighs and drops the pillow to the ground. “I’m sorry, Luciana. I won’t kill your husband. You make good points. But I am not going to let you be with him. We’re going back home.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re coming back home with me. You’re going to stay with me again. I will keep you safe from Dante if he tries anything. But you are not going to be with Matteo any longer.”
“You don’t get to make that decision for me. You already made the decision for my life when I was forced to marry Matteo and now that I have come to love him, you want to take me from him?”
He sucks in a breath. “You love him?”
I realize I have never said it out loud before. “Yes. I love him. Do not take me from him.”
The openness in my father’s eyes disappears in an instant. “I am doing what is best for you. You will see that in time. Now, let’s get you back to your room. You need to rest still.”
“Then stay with me. I don’t trust you to not kill my husband.”
My father walks me back to my room. The tension between us is so thick, you wouldn’t even be able to cut it with a knife. He settles down in the chair beside the bed while I lay back down.
I don’t remove my eyes from him at all. But I know eventually I’ll have to sleep and who knows what my father might do then?