Chapter Ten
Ten
I WOKE TO THE SOUND of tapping. Not the gentle shift of a house bracing itself against the elements, nor the brisk, scurrying taps of the menagerie of creatures that nested in the walls. It was a rhythmic, intentional tapping, and it was coming from the window.
I lay awake listening to it at first, my fear surging around me in the way it always did in the early hours of the morning. As wakefulness began to set in, the tapping persisted, louder now. Something must have been caught against the window and was flapping in the wind. That was all.
‘Clara.’
That wasn’t the wind. I shot out of bed, more awake than ever. I pulled a robe around my shoulders, as though the thin layer of warmth might protect me from danger, then mustered the courage to open the curtains.
I suspected I’d find a face in the darkness and still the apparition made me jump.
‘Raleigh.’
He was clinging to the wall, framed by the open window and shutters, but how, I couldn’t imagine. There were no handholds on this side of the house.
A mix of emotions washed through me. This was exactly the scenario I’d feared, but now, seeing his face shining in the dark, the trace of annoyance weighing down his brow, I no longer cared whether he locked me in the castle for the rest of the year, or if he cut off all my contact to the outside world.
All I wanted was for him to take me away from here.
‘May I come in?’
I couldn’t read his tone. ‘Do you need permission?’
‘I was being polite,’ Raleigh said coolly. ‘Your father invited me in years ago.’
I let out a shaking breath, trying not to think about what that meant, and stepped aside to give him room. ‘Fine. Come in.’
His eyes narrowed in that dark calculating way they did when he seemed to be assessing me, as though he hadn’t expected me to give in so easily.
He climbed above the window, then swung feet first into the room, looking irritatingly graceful all the while.
I gave him a moment of privacy while he straightened his clothes, turning my attention to the window instead.
‘How did you get through the shutters?’ They were still intact, creaking in the wind, but the barricade was gone.
Raleigh sat on my old bed, reclining like he had every right to be there, which was a strangely uncomfortable sight.
‘I removed the nails,’ he said, as if it should be obvious.
This unnerved me more than if he had torn through the wood.
How much strength did he need to pull a nail from the wall with his bare hands?
‘You need more than a locked window to keep me away. I can’t say I’m not hurt that you ran from me the moment my back was turned. ’
‘That’s not … You don’t understand.’
Raleigh raised his brows. His face was a mask of cool indifference, but I knew him better now and recognised the tension in his shoulders. ‘We’re here, aren’t we?’
‘I meant to come back.’
‘Yes, you told Moira the same thing. Yet here you are, asleep in your father’s house, with the shutters nailed shut to keep me out.’
‘Don’t blame Moira. It’s my fault.’
‘I know,’ he said, ‘I trust Moira completely. I wouldn’t trust you to hold my horse.’
I tried not to let the comment fester. ‘I tried to return as promised, but …’ The words escaped me. Actually voicing what Father had done felt wrong; it was a low I’d thought only the worst of men could stoop to. Men like Raleigh. If I told him, it would feel real.
My arms throbbed, the bruises already forming from the force of being dragged upstairs. This was real, whether I told him or not. ‘Father locked me in here,’ I said. ‘The windows were nailed down to keep me in, not to keep you out. You can try the door if you don’t believe me.’
Raleigh’s lips curled in cold amusement.
‘I’m telling the truth.’
‘No, I know.’ His voice dripped with sardonic disdain. ‘This is exactly the sort of thing Juri would do.’
‘You don’t know my father,’ I said out of reflex.
Raleigh tilted his head. ‘Apparently I know him better than you do.’
I resented that he would suggest such a thing, but the evidence still lay open on the nightstand, the words seared into my memory.
Raleigh had known right away who was intercepting my letters, when it had never once occurred to me to suspect Father.
I wondered what else he knew, what else he had seen that had twisted Father so grotesquely from the man I knew.
Our engagement was a punishment, after all.
There were worse crimes than mail tampering.
‘Maybe you’re right,’ I said eventually.
Raleigh jerked as if burnt, then stared at me as though seeing me for the first time. ‘What?’
I handed him the letter he’d written. It was so dark I could barely tell there was writing on the page, but Raleigh read over it without pause.
His night vision must have been better than that of humans.
None of the books I’d read had mentioned such a thing, but it made sense for a nocturnal creature.
‘I’m sorry I accused you of stealing my letters,’ I said without meeting his eye. ‘You were right. It was Father all along.’
Raleigh kept his face bowed, pretending to keep reading the letter, though it was only a few lines long.
Something in the room seemed to shift. I no longer felt like I was on the edge of a precipice with Father rushing towards me and Raleigh waiting at the bottom. I could feel the warmth of the fire.
When Raleigh finally looked up again, he was grinning. ‘Are you really Clara?’
My cheeks turned hot. ‘You don’t need to gloat about it.’
‘It’s the first time you’ve been nice to me,’ he said lightly. ‘I’m enjoying it.’
‘Well, I’m glad one of us gets to enjoy the revelation that my father is a horrible person.’
Raleigh’s expression darkened. ‘Believe me, I take no enjoyment in your father’s actions,’ he said. ‘Did he panic when you found the letters? Is that why he locked you in here?’
‘No.’ I thought of Yann nailing the shutters, Father’s suggestion I take a bag. ‘I think he planned this.’
‘Well, then. It sounds like it’s my turn to play the part of your doting fiancé and help you escape. Feeling familiar?’
‘If you’re going to be like that, I might just stay here.’
Raleigh fell silent. ‘Would you prefer to?’ With his face turned away, it was impossible to tell whether he was taunting me.
‘Is that a genuine offer?’
‘The option is yours, but know that our deal will still persist.’ His fingers traced the heavy fabric of my quilt, eyes raking over my mother’s careful needlework. ‘If you think you can lift my curse from here, I shan’t prevent you from staying.’
It wasn’t much of a choice. We both knew I wouldn’t be able to do so from here. With a tremor, I realised he was offering me freedom, a lease on life for my final months before I allowed myself to be cursed for eternity.
I could run. Raleigh would always find me if I remained in the valley, but what if I went further?
Six months was long enough to go anywhere.
I could go to England, or another continent altogether.
Could he really find me if I left everything behind and started afresh?
I didn’t think so. Not for a long time, at least.
I would be free.
And I would live the rest of my life knowing that I had a debt to repay and that the collector could come knocking at any moment. Eternal darkness waited for me if I stayed, so I could only imagine how horrible the punishment would be if he caught up with me. Death would be a mercy.
I couldn’t do it. I had to see through my bargain. The odds were stacked against me, but so had they always been. I’d survived this long through drought and famine, I could survive this too.
‘I’ll return with you,’ I said.
Raleigh’s hand stilled on the bedspread.
‘I’ve barely made a dent in my research,’ I added, before he made the mistake of thinking this was for him.
‘Very well, but know the choice to return is yours this time.’ He stood and stretched, as though he had been sitting for hours and not mere minutes, then made his way to the door.
‘So you can stop insulting me every time we meet.’ His fingers closed around the doorknob. ‘Get ready to run. This may be loud.’
He wrenched the handle and the lock gave way with a metallic crunch. We both tensed, waiting for the frantic thumping of panicked footsteps, but there was only silence.
‘Quickly,’ Raleigh whispered. ‘Juri could wake at any time.’
‘I need a candle first,’ I hissed back. On the other side of the door, darkness pooled like an entrance to the abyss. There were no windows in the hall, and no fireplaces to light the way.
‘There isn’t time. Just follow my step.’
‘I can’t see your step.’
This gave him pause. He furrowed his brow, and I wondered if he’d forgotten how darkness looked to humans. It had been so very long since he was human.
‘Then let me guide you,’ he said. ‘I ought to be able to protect my bride.’
And suddenly he was right beside me, close enough that the lack of body warmth was disarming.
He placed a guiding hand on the small of my back.
To protect me? Control me? I couldn’t decide whether to lean into him or push him away.
In my indecision I did neither, but fell into step with him as he crept from the room, allowing him to guide me through the sludgy darkness.
‘Left here,’ Raleigh whispered, ‘and be careful, there are stairs ahead.’
I knew there were stairs ahead: I’d climbed them nearly every day for the past twenty-five years. But I bit back my retort lest our whispers wake my father.
We crept painfully slowly down the narrow stairway.
Raleigh could have easily scooped me up and carried me down.
I almost wished he had. Somehow, his hand on my back felt more intimate.
I could have pulled away, increased my stride, but I let him stay.
The gentle pressure was there by my choosing, and so the friction that built with every step was all the more stifling.