Chapter 2 #2
Lachesis studies me. “Big picture, honey. You have to think big picture.” When I shake my head again, she continues.
“What happens when a tree decays in the forest? It makes way for new things. The rotten wood falls to the ground and nourishes the soil. You see it as an end, but the larger powers see it as renewal. Remember the black plague in the Dark Ages? It upended society and paved the way for the Renaissance. Change isn’t always bad. It’s just change.”
Just change? Can she really see it like that?
I can’t. I’ve seen the devastation that “just change” can bring close up.
But I’m not here to argue it. If me shutting my mouth and serving some strange god of disease gets David free of cancer, I’m grabbing that opportunity with both hands.
“And you said it needs to be me? Is there something special about me?”
Lachesis gives me a gentle smile. “The most special thing about you is that you aren’t special.
Every thread we pull from the weave of souls, we consider what outward ripples it has on others.
All threads cross, some more than others.
If we cut short the thread of a simple farmer, it might create a ripple effect that topples kingdoms that aren’t meant to be toppled yet.
If we remove you, though, it doesn’t cause any massive ripples in the fabric of life.
There are no world-ending situations. You’re just… gone. Poof.” She flicks her fingers.
Poof. My entire life is less than a poof. “What about David?”
She raises a finger in the air. “That’s the interesting part. If his thread continues, he develops revolutionary cancer treatments that help thousands of people. He marries the love of his life and has children, and all of their threads also successful and beneficial to the universe as a whole.”
“So… why not just do it?”
“Like I said, I owe someone a favor. And you’ve got the right personality to be the watchdog to the god we’re looking to have, well, watched. Once we move you over, I’ll tweak David’s fate thread. He’s going to risk an experimental cancer treatment and it’s going to work wonders on him.”
I twist my hands in my lap to hide their trembling. David is going to have everything. I’m going to lose everything, but David will get all that I ever wanted for him to have—happiness and a family of his own. Success in his career. A great life.
Never mind that I’m giving all of mine up. It’s easier to agree to as long as I don’t think about what it means for me, the poof. I focus on David instead. “Experimental treatments are costly. David needs to win the lottery, too.”
Lachesis chuckles. “A hard bargain. Okay, fine. He’ll get a scratch ticket on the way home one day and it’ll surprise him.”
I eye her. She’s conceding so easily to huge, world-changing decisions. “This job is going to be terrible, isn’t it?”
“You said it doesn’t matter, remember?”
“It doesn’t, but I’m just getting confirmation.”
“He’s no one’s favorite person. His name is Kalos, he’s the god of disease and decay in his realm, which I told you about. He’s also a total shitstain, but all of the gods are in their realm. That’s one reason why they’re being punished.”
“Punished…?”
“Oh, it’s a long story, but I suppose we have nothing but time, right?
” She pulls out another cigarette. “Okay, so the other world is called Aos. It’s run by a pantheon of gods.
I forget how many. Ten? Twelve? Whatever, not important.
Anyhow, the High Father runs the show, and the others have their own petty squabbles.
When they misbehave, he doesn’t clean house like the High Father does here.
He basically sends them down to the mortal realm to learn a little humanity. ”
Wait, clean house? High Father here?
Before I can ask, she continues. “The people in their world call it an ‘Anticipation.’ The gods are split into the four aspects that the High Father has deemed the worst for a god to have—Apathy, Lies, Hedonism, and Arrogance. Each Aspect is sent to live amongst the mortals, and they can only ascend back to the heavens by defeating the other three aspects of themselves.”
That seems…strange. “Why not eradicate all vices while you’re at it?”
“Why have sugar in your coffee? Why add salt to your food? A bit of spice adds a little flavor. It’s not about destroying someone’s personality as much as it is teaching them a little humility.
Reminding them what their purpose is. They’re still his children, though.
He doesn’t want to eradicate what makes them them.
Just tweak it a little. Add a little zhuzh. ”
It makes no sense to me, but I suppose it makes sense to the god in charge. “Where do I come into all of this?”
“During the Anticipation, each god’s Aspect remains divine.
He cannot use his powers. The god remains immortal, however, and does not need to eat or drink or breathe to survive.
Because of this, he or she must be anchored to a human.
The tether to a mortal keeps the god aspect locked to the mortal plane.
Also, it helps the god realize a little something about the people he’s supposed to be serving. ”
I piece this together. “I’m going to serve as an Anchor? His mortal tie to the world?”
She nods.
It sounds like something I can do—she referred to it as babysitting. I can keep a god company. “All right. And it’s just until all the aspects defeat each other? What happens to me then?”
“Oh, if he dies, the god’s Aspect is defeated. The Anchor is more or less the target.”
I freeze in place.
“I didn’t say there wasn’t a catch to this,” Lachesis reminds me, smoking her cigarette. “But your situation’s going to be a little different than most. We’ve picked out the Aspect you’re going to be serving, and we want you to stay alive. We’re juicing the system, so to speak.”
I swallow hard. “Well, can I say that I’m glad to hear that?”
“Don’t get too excited,” Lachesis says with a chuckle. “You’re going to be saddled with Apathy.”
“Apathy,” I echo. “That’s the Aspect?”
She nods. “An apathetic god of disease serves humanity best at this current time. In the past, Kalos has been a very naughty boy, and the Fates have decided that out of all the possible aspects, they want Apathy in charge for a while. From what I’m told, the last one was Arrogance and he was a goddamn mess.
Picked a fight with a goddess, plagues everywhere, tried to conquer the world…
just the worst.” Lachesis shakes her head. “So… Apathy.”
“Okay…so I just…stay alive?”
“More or less. But because he’s Apathy, he’s not going to help things along.” She grimaces. “He might work against you. He might want to get done with his stint in the human world as quickly as possible. It’s up to you to keep him safe and yourself alive until he’s clear to ascend again.”
I nod, my head reeling. Well, she did say I would be babysitting. And she said I wouldn’t like it. But David gets his life back, the life he always wanted. He’ll be free from the cancer. He’ll be free from financial stress.
And I’m apparently just a blip on the radar that can be easily removed.
“Any more questions?”
I keep thinking. I’m all for this strange stroke of luck, but I know I should be thinking through the ramifications, or I’ll regret it later. “What happens to me when I die?”
She takes a drag from her cigarette. “Whatever happens in their world. You’re attached to their tapestry of fate at that point and out of my hands.”
“I don’t want that. I want to come back here after I die,” I say. “So I can see my brother and my family again.”
Lachesis rolls her eyes. “You sure?” I nod. “Fine. I’ll pull a few more strings, though it’s not normally done like that.”
“I appreciate you making the exception for me,” I say politely.
The goddess shrugs. “What else?”
I rub my brow. “I honestly can’t think of anything else. But I’m also still trying to absorb everything.”
“Changing your mind?”
“No, I’m going to do it.”
“Great. That makes things easier for me.” She stubs her cigarette in the puddle of now-cold coffee and gets to her feet. “You ready to go?”
“What, now?” I clutch the edge of the table as if it can somehow stop things from moving forward. “Don’t I get to say goodbye?”
One unplucked brown brow goes up. “What, and tell him that you’re about to head off to Narnia on some sort of grand adventure?
No, sweetie, no one gets to know about our bargain.
Your coworkers are going to wonder where you disappeared off to, and you’re never going to come home.
You’re going to be just another young woman that disappeared from the city, and no one will ever find another trace of you. ”
Oh.
A hard knot rises in my throat. It’s not that I wanted to say goodbye to my coworkers.
I can live without telling them farewell.
It’s leaving David that I’m struggling with.
I’ve been close to my brother ever since our parents died.
I talk to him every day. We share everything.
To think that I have to turn around and just…
disappear without a word of explanation to him hurts.
It feels like I’m abandoning him.
But…how can I not? How can I be selfish when Lachesis is really going to give him everything he needs? I lick my lips, aching deep inside. “Can’t I leave him a note to let him know I love him?”
Her expression grows sympathetic. “Oh, sweetie. Don’t you think he already knows?”
A tear spills out of my eye, and I wipe it away. My hands smell like spilled coffee. “Right. Of course. I just…but…okay.” I take a deep breath and close my eyes for a moment. “I think I’m ready.”
Lachesis holds out her hand, palm up. I put mine in hers, and the world tilts around me.
When my eyes refocus, I’m no longer in the coffee shop.