Chapter 45 #2
‘Just heat it up enough to kill anything on it. But without burning it. No fire,’ I say emphatically. ‘Like drying the wood. But I don’t want this dried, just warmed. Does that make sense?’
‘I think so.’ He nods, as if contemplating whether he can actually do it. ‘You okay to give me another hit of magic?’
‘I hope so. Let’s give it a go anyway.’
Of all the powers that have been thrust upon me since the Retterheld, the power to transfer magic is one I feel I actually have control of, which makes me wonder where it could have come from.
Still, I’m not going to dwell on the matter now. Not when there are more practical matters to focus on.
With so many trees around me, the hardest part is knowing which to make grow. Knowing one, at least, that’s safe to connect with, I extend the patch of moss on the tree that Thessa okayed and then draw the magic back out and pass it into Ruben.
‘That enough?’ I ask.
He closes his eyes and a faint smile dusts his lips. ‘I will never get sick of that feeling,’ he says. He opens his eyes and meets my gaze. ‘I wish Mum could have seen this. She would have loved seeing me create a flame.’
‘She would have,’ I agree softly, ‘but she was always so proud of you, just as you were. You know that.’
He shrugs his shoulders, as if he doesn’t believe what I’m saying.
With my task momentarily forgotten, I place my hand on his shoulder. ‘Ruben, she was so proud of how you used your gift. She would always talk to me about it. Talk about how many lives you must have saved.’
‘She did?’
I nod. ‘She did. Promise.’
He shakes his head slightly, as if trying to make the words sink in.
‘She never said anything like that to me.’
‘Probably to keep that giant ego of yours down.’ I grin.
‘Yeah, makes sense.’
The laugh that leaves us is a mixture of humour and sadness. Ruben doesn’t have enough arrogance to fill his little finger, and we both know that. Every bone in his body is pure kindness, just like Noleen’s was.
I’m just glad she’s no longer in pain. No longer suffering.
‘Okay,’ I say, drawing us back to the task at hand and pulling us out of the melancholy that threatens to claim us. ‘Over to you. Remember, I still need the moss mossy. I just need it sterilised, that’s all.’
Just like when he was drying out the wood, Ruben’s first attempt results in a pile of blackened, charred moss. His second attempt smokes lightly before also catching fire.
‘It’s all right, don’t worry,’ I tell him, but he shakes his head.
‘Just give me a couple of minutes. I can do it right. I nearly had it.’
This time he holds it in his hand longer than the others, but there are no great waves of magic flowing from him. Instead, there’s just a constant, low buzz. When he’s done, he blows it lightly to cool it down. When it’s cool enough for me to handle, he passes it back to me.
‘That’s as much as I can do without it turning crispy,’ he says. ‘But I think I got it hot enough.’
‘Thank you.’
The hopefully sterilised moss is still substantially hotter than I expected, and I’m forced to juggle it lightly between my hands for the first couple of moments to stop it from burning me.
Thankfully, it doesn’t take long for it to cool enough to let me squeeze it into two little balls.
I hold them in my hands and let my magic flow into them, not to grow them or change them, but to tell the moss what I want of it: silence.
I release the moss from my power, unsure whether I’ve added a magical component to it or not.
‘Loch?’ I call over to the older man. His eyes jerk towards me. ‘I’ve got something for you. Try these in your ears.’
I’ve no idea if they’ll work. After all, his hearing is magical, not just physical. But I think it’s worth a shot. And clearly he does, too, as he pushes them into his ear canals with eagerness. He instantly beams at me.
‘Better?’ I ask.
‘Much better,’ he yells, making me grin. Mission accomplished.
Loch’s pacing decreases, and while that allows Benny a little time to relax, it doesn’t ease the tension in the camp the way I hoped it would. The dire wolf’s unusual behaviour is making everyone nervous. Whatever’s going on with her, I’m now pretty sure this isn’t just about Kyor.
It takes me a few minutes to build up the courage to do what I have to do.
‘Hey.’ Kyor barely lifts his head to look at me, but he doesn’t tell me to fuck off, so I carry on. ‘What’s wrong with Elska? She wasn’t even this upset when we were racing to Galreck and you were dying on her back.’
Rather than responding, Kyor presses his lips together and takes a long inhale through his nose.
‘I just want to help,’ I push.
Finally, he offers a nod. ‘She’s sensing pain, and she’s desperate to go and ease it, but she won’t leave me.’
It’s my turn to press my lips together, trying to ignore the lump that’s building in my throat.
‘Are you sure she’s not talking about you?’ I ask. ‘Your injury? And maybe … about us? Your emotions must be …’ I trail off, not sure how to complete the sentence.
For what feels like the first time in moons, he meets my eyes and gives me a rueful smile before rubbing a hand over his face.
‘Yeah. I’m …’ He sighs. ‘But no.’ The shake of his head is far more definitive than I expected.
‘No. Trust me, she’s not happy about this.
’ He gestures to me and then points to Benny.
‘But this is definitely different. I’ve asked her whose pain it is, but it’s like she’s blocking me out.
I don’t know how to get through to her.’
There’s not just worry in his voice. There’s fear.
Fear that she might leave him? Surely not. I don’t even know if that’s possible. I always thought dire wolves bonded for life.
‘Has she done anything like this before? Acted like this before?’ I ask him.
‘No.’ Again, Kyor replies with the same level of certainty. ‘Never.’
So much for wanting to help her. If she won’t even tell Kyor what’s going on, there’s no chance she’s going to tell me.
‘Does she want to look for this friend in pain?’ I ask. ‘Does she want us to look for them?’
I don’t want to do anything to delay this trip.
Just the thought of it is enough to fill my mind with images of William’s body.
How much will the icy pattern have spread since my vision?
Has he let Kay know? I’m sure if Jonas knew just how bad it was, he’d refuse to let him go out in public for fear of it being seen, but William probably knows that too and has likely kept it to himself for that exact reason.
I need to get to the Issen, but Elska is not in the best frame of mind, which could slow us down a lot more. Or worse, put us at risk if she’s too distracted to hear a threat coming.
Kyor licks his lips and admits, ‘She’s not responding to me.’
His eyes meet mine, and his anguish strikes me. Elska is the only one in his life who’s never let him down. If something happens between the two of them now, it might just be the nail in the coffin for Kyor.
Any hope of him ever forming a relationship – ever loving again – would be gone.
Trying to disguise the anxiety that filters through me, I reach out and take his hand, half expecting him to pull away.
‘I’m sorry.’
A pause drifts between us, and he lets me hold his hand for a few moments before he withdraws, physically and emotionally. His face is blank once more, devoid of the agony he allowed me to see only moments ago.
‘Thank you,’ he says brusquely.
He let me touch him – let me offer comfort, if only for a moment. It’s something.
I nod and leave him to get ready for bed.