Chapter Sixteen
WILDER
A lthea Zoltaire had destroyed him. And it was the greatest privilege of his life.
His heart threatened to burst from his chest as it pounded, trying to catch up with everything he felt.
Eyes closed, Wilder rested his brow against hers, allowing himself a moment to savour her, a brief pocket of time between what they’d shared and the moment reality would come rushing in like an icy wave.
He didn’t trust himself to speak, for fear of what might come tumbling out.
Each time with Thea was more powerful, more all-consuming than the last, and there was no telling the ways in which she’d wreck him, over and over again.
All he knew was that he would never be free of this now, nor did he want to be.
Thea was quiet too, as though she knew whatever words came next would break the spell.
Wilder kissed her slowly and thoroughly, the way he’d kiss her if he’d been granted the time to court her in the way she deserved.
He was so fucked, so well and truly in over his head.
At last, she broke away, still out of breath, eyes wide. ‘Wilder…’ she murmured, her expression pained as she reached for her discarded clothes. ‘What does this mean for us?’
Wilder’s chest was tight as he followed her lead, tugging on his pants and shirt, still feeling the phantom touch of her on his skin.
‘I don’t know,’ he replied honestly, his voice raw. ‘All I know is that I can’t seem to stay away.’
Thea met his gaze, understanding gleaming in her eyes. ‘All those weeks ago, you said —’
‘I know what I said.’ It came out harsher than he intended. ‘I was… I was trying to do the right thing. By you, by the midrealms.’
Thea finished dressing, seeming to steel herself. ‘Then we need to figure this out. We can’t keep going like this. It’s not good for either of us.’
Her words were like a hot lance to the gut. ‘What is it you’re proposing?’
Straightening her clothes and squaring her shoulders, Thea went to the mouth of the cave and looked outward across the seas. ‘We should take some time to think, and then we need to have a conversation. An honest one this time.’
Wilder felt increasingly heavy as he joined her. He fought every instinct that screamed at him to reach out and touch her, to lace his fingers through hers, to reassure her.
‘Alright,’ he heard himself say instead.
* * *
‘She’s not progressing,’ Audra told him sharply in the council room that night. ‘Not nearly fast enough.’
‘Well, the magic is your department, Audra,’ Wilder countered, resting his elbows on the back of a chair. ‘And you’re the one who told her that she can’t be a magic-wielding heir and a Warsword.’
The librarian glared at him, but continued as if he hadn’t spoken. ‘A reckoning is coming, Hawthorne. And she needs to be ready.’
‘What do you want me to do about it? I’m holding up my end of this wretched agreement. Despite all my objections, I’m her mentor, for better or for worse. I’m training her.’
Guilt lurched in Wilder’s gut. Was that the honest truth? His dealings with Thea since his return had been a mess.
Audra pushed her spectacles to the bridge of her nose and sighed. ‘The Daughter of Darkness sent word to the rulers directly. They have not only been informed of her hunt, but also of her offer to spare those who do her dirty work for her.’
‘Fuck.’ Wilder put his head in his hands. ‘Have the kingdoms agreed to defend the heirs?’
Audra gave a dark laugh. ‘No. They have put bounties on their heads. Anyone showing signs of magic is to be brought in for questioning. Any rumours reported to each kingdom’s officials.’
‘Gods, every man and his dog will be searching for the heirs now.’
‘Indeed. I’d wager there are plenty of common folk who’d step on their own mother to sell them out. There are rewards offered for information, but the subtext is clear: information, their heads – they’ll take anything.’
‘Furies save us.’
‘There’s more.’
‘Of course there is,’ Wilder muttered. It wasn’t enough that they were harbouring two fugitives, not only from his fellow Warswords, but from the rulers of the midrealms themselves.
‘There are reports spreading from across the seas,’ Audra told him, glancing at the closed door. ‘Wild storms that are felt across the realms beyond this one. Monsters unlike any we have ever seen, clawing their way through the Veil with the help of lightning and thunder…’
Only decades of training stopped Wilder from flinching. Storms… The very word made his skin prickle. Thea’s magic, her sister’s…
His voice was hoarse when he spoke again. ‘Storm magic and darkness… If it comes to light that they’re alive, the heirs of Delmira will be blamed for what’s happening.’
‘Yes,’ the librarian said simply.
‘You still think it’s a good idea to keep them at Thezmarr?’ he asked, rubbing his aching temples.
‘Come and watch their next lesson,’ Audra said. ‘Perhaps that will help —’
‘I don’t think that’s a good idea.’
‘Why not? You’re the only one who has seen Thea’s power in action. More than once, I might add. Perhaps your presence will bring it out in her.’
‘My presence usually inspires unending rage.’ Among other things.
‘Good. That’s how it should be between master and apprentice.’
‘Is it? It wasn’t like that for me.’
‘You could have fooled me, with all your anger for Talemir.’
Wilder stiffened. ‘That wasn’t about the apprenticeship.’
‘What was it about, then?’
‘None of your damn business, Audra.’
The older woman rolled her eyes and straightened her sleeves.
‘You’re right. The petty squabbles of men are no concern of mine.
My concern is the pair of Delmirian princesses we have in our midst, and the one in particular who can’t control her magic.
It’s dangerous, Hawthorne. Now more than ever.
Come to the plains. Watch the session,’ Audra demanded.
‘I want to see what happens when you’re there. ’
‘Nothing good,’ Wilder assured her.
‘We’ll see about that.’
* * *
‘What’s he doing here?’ Thea asked as Wilder reached the hidden spot at the southern end of the Plains of Orax.
He’d spent the night in Torj’s quarters and hadn’t seen Thea since they’d fucked in the caves, since she’d told him they needed to figure things out. This was hardly an ideal first meeting after that. But Audra didn’t miss a beat; she never did.
‘He’s here as an observer.’
‘I’m not an act in a performing troupe,’ Thea replied.
‘No? You’re putting on quite the show right now,’ Audra quipped.
Thea seethed at the librarian, while her sister Wren’s narrow-eyed stare of dislike was aimed directly at Wilder.
While he didn’t think Thea would have confided in her sister and friends about the intricacies of their relationship, they weren’t fools.
They knew something had happened between master and apprentice, and as a consequence, he was now an object of disdain to them.
Fair enough , he thought as he took up a place against a rock by a patch of brambles.
He let his gaze drift towards the dark seas lapping below the cliffs, let the briny air kiss his face.
When was the last time he’d felt peace? When was the last time he’d breathed an easy breath and not thought of the million things pressing down on him?
The sisters were looking warily at him. ‘Don’t mind me,’ he told them. ‘As you were.’
‘Ladies, focus.’ Audra’s voice cut through the vitriol. ‘Thea, any progress?’
Thea heaved a sigh. ‘I don’t know, Audra. I just don’t get it. The magic is there when I’m at my worst, but when I’m more stable, it snuffs out. What does that say about me?’
‘It says you’re afraid,’ Wilder heard himself say.
She whirled around to face him. ‘I thought you were here as an observer .’
‘Not much to observe yet,’ he replied.
Thea’s nostrils flared, but she turned back to Audra and Wren. ‘So, what now?’
‘We try again,’ Wren answered.
Wilder thought Thea was about to snap at her sister, but she said nothing as she turned her back to them all, facing the expanse of sea beyond the Chained Islands. Her shoulders rose and fell as she inhaled deeply.
Wilder’s skin prickled. He had seen her lightning carve through the sky, through a rheguld reaper … He knew it was something to behold, something to be feared.
But when Thea’s fingers flexed at her sides and she tipped her head back to the sky, nothing happened.
Nearby, power crackled at Wren’s fingertips, and he heard Thea click her tongue in frustration. ‘Show-off,’ she muttered.
‘You can do it, Thea. We all know you can,’ Wren encouraged.
Thea only stiffened at the kindness.
‘Find your centre, Thea,’ Audra coaxed. ‘That pocket of calm within —’
Wilder nearly laughed. Thea didn’t have a pocket of calm in her entire body; she was a living storm of chaos.
But to his surprise, Thea listened. Though her back was still to him, he could see the change in her breathing, could see how her body stilled as she tried to do as her warden instructed.
A minute passed, then another.
‘Fuck,’ Thea cried in frustration. She whirled on her heel to face Wren. ‘How are you doing it? I don’t understand.’
Wren grimaced in sympathy. ‘I’ve been dealing with it a lot longer than you. It will take time.’
‘I don’t have fucking time,’ Thea snapped. ‘If you’d just told me the damn truth —’
‘You weren’t ready,’ Wren said quietly.
‘That wasn’t for you to decide.’
Wren ignored this. ‘Try again.’
It was far less spectacular than Wilder had envisioned. Two young women and Audra all snapping at each other on the plains, punctuated by small bursts of lightning from Wren that only served to fuel Thea’s irritation.