Chapter Eighteen #2
When the midday sun was high and hot, they halted their ride to put the lessons into practice while their horses rested.
Wilder made sure there were no lingering looks or touches between them as he showed her how to clean and gut a boar, and how to stretch the hide, tan and cure it to be used later.
But despite the bloody task at hand, they found themselves laughing, Thea recalling just how much roast boar her friend Kipp had eaten during their visit to the Laughing Fox.
For a moment Wilder entertained the thought that one day he might take her there, that they might laugh together over wine and a game of billiards.
He shook the thought away and returned his attention to the game that needed tending to.
Normally, Wilder wouldn’t have been so concerned with having such hearty meals on the road; he would have made do with rations, but he was determined to ensure Thea was as nourished and strong as possible for whatever lay ahead.
At his side, Thea drank in the information as though she were parched. His teaching was punctuated by quiet, thoughtful questions from her. They spoke of monsters and politics, of history and home, the words flowing easily between them, as though they had been doing it this way all along.
Wilder shared his knowledge with her, but Furies, did he miss her. There was a new type of closeness forming between them now and it showed him what she had become to him in those months before the initiation test. Every instinct within told him to reach out to her, to lay everything bare.
Thea glanced at him, as though sensing his thoughts. ‘You’ve never told me where you were from… before Thezmarr.’
Wilder hesitated. It had been a long time since he’d spoken of his homeland. ‘A little seaside town between Tver and Aveum. A long way from here. It’s called Kilgrave.’ He could almost taste the briny air on his lips at the mention of its name.
‘What’s it like?’
‘Cold.’
She raised a single brow and waited.
Wilder had to bite back a laugh. He liked that she pushed him, that she didn’t take his moody shit.
‘What? It is cold. The ice winds from Aveum come down through the mountains in the winter. Even the summers are cold, being so close to the frozen lake. But the views… The views are like nothing else.’
‘When’s the last time you were back there?’
‘A long time ago now,’ he replied, getting up to busy himself with readying the horses once more. He wasn’t used to talking about himself – wasn’t used to anyone asking .
Thea seemed to recognise that it was a lot for him and changed tact. ‘Are you going to tell me whose hawk that was back at Thezmarr?’
Wilder’s gaze shot to hers. ‘It was from a source in Naarva. A friend, I suppose.’
‘Didn’t realise you had those – besides me, obviously.’
‘Very funny.’
Thea shrugged, waiting for further explanation.
Wilder heaved a sigh.
‘Tell me the whole truth or none at all,’ she said.
‘And if I said none at all?’
‘Then I’d call you a bastard and be done with it.’
Wilder had to hold back his smile. ‘Fair enough.’
‘So?’
‘So… The hawk’s name is Terrence.’
Thea blinked. ‘Terrence? What sort of a name —’
‘Don’t even ask.’ He adjusted his grip on the reins and checked the positioning of the sun.
‘He’s become an unofficial envoy of sorts between some of my sources.
He often brings me word from a ranger in Naarva called Dratos.
Reports from the Veil south of there, how many monsters are getting through… ’
‘How?’
‘How?’ Wilder raised a brow. ‘I told you I was there when it fell six years ago. And there again for the final conflict. There are a few survivors scattered around the kingdom.’
‘But I thought it was covered in shadow… You’re saying people still live there?’
‘Very few. And to the knowledge of even fewer.’ He added that last bit with a note of warning.
‘People you care about,’ Thea guessed.
‘Just people.’
His apprentice gave him a look as if to say she knew better than that. Then she looked to the north, where, beyond their line of sight, Delmira waited. ‘I thought Naarva was lost.’
‘It was.’
‘And yet people remain… Do you think anyone remains in Delmira?’
‘You’ve seen Delmira. It’s nothing but ruins.’ Wilder shrugged. ‘I suppose I don’t know for sure.’
‘Guess we’ll find out soon enough,’ she said, reaching for the food. ‘What did your friend Dratos have to say?’
Wilder almost winced at the term friend .
He hadn’t actually known Dratos all that well during his time in Naarva.
It had only been in the years that followed that they’d stayed in touch.
Originally Wilder had suspected it was because the ranger had been ordered to ensure that Wilder spilt no secrets of the fallen kingdom, that he told no one of the plans unfolding there.
But over time, a kinship of sorts had developed through their letters and reports.
Dratos was one of the few people Wilder knew who was unapologetically themself, always. He begrudgingly admired that.
Remembering himself, he answered Thea. ‘Only that things are worsening to the south. That recently, he lost some of his… people. He told me to expect more monsters – wraiths, reapers and the likes of the vine blight we saw up on the cliffs.’
‘Great.’
‘Welcome to the life of a Warsword.’
The words of warning had the opposite effect to what he’d intended. In fact, it was the most genuine smile he’d seen from Thea in a long while.
* * *
Wilder’s relief didn’t last long. He froze at the edge of the small watering hole where they’d stopped to rest the horses, his whole body suddenly tense.
‘What is it?’ Thea asked, her hand on the grip of her sword.
Wilder was already wading through the reeds, his grip closing around the limb that floated on the surface.
His chest tightened as he dragged the corpse to dry land, laying it down gently and stepping back. The person hadn’t been dead long.
Thea was at his side in an instant, a gasp on her lips. ‘Is that…’
Wilder peered down at the young man. Dark, membranous wings sprouted from his back, talons tipping his fingers. ‘Another half-wraith,’ he finished for Thea, nodding.
She crouched by the creature’s head, her eyes scanning what Wilder had already noted – the black vein-like webbing across the remaining human skin; the scars on his chest from when he’d been turned.
Wilder had seen it before. There was no telling where this one had come from, or where his allegiance lay…
And were it not for the few distinct wraith features, it might have been an ordinary man, perhaps roughly Wilder’s own age. The thought didn’t sit well with him.
‘How common are these monsters?’ Thea asked, her gaze trained on the half-wraith’s wings now, wings that were limp and caved in at odd angles.
Wilder raked a hand through his hair. ‘Hard to say. But it’s odd to have found two of them alone in different territories.’
‘It definitely doesn’t feel like a coincidence.’
He watched as Thea traced the bone-like frame of the creature’s wing with her fingertip, a dark expression clouding her face.
He couldn’t tell her about them, not yet.
If he was wrong about the half-wraiths, it would put her in direct danger, and if he was right…
Well, fuck – if he was right, he didn’t know what it might mean for her, for the midrealms.
But for once, his apprentice wasn’t looking to him for explanations or answers. She seemed thoroughly fixated on the half-wraith and his wings.
‘What is it?’ he asked her.
She didn’t look away from the creature. ‘I’ve seen…’
‘Seen what?’
‘Something like this before,’ she said slowly, still not looking up at him.
‘Yes,’ he replied, dread curdling in his gut. ‘On the clifftops with the vine blight.’
But Thea shook her head. ‘No. In my dreams, Wilder. The one last night…’
Heart pounding fiercely, Wilder crouched beside her and cupped her chin, drawing her face away from the creature to meet his gaze. ‘You saw this exact half-wraith? Like a premonition?’
‘No,’ Thea whispered, her hands shaking at her sides. ‘Not this one. A woman… She was overseeing prisoners like this. Half-wraiths, as you call them. They were being tortured.’ She let out a shuddering breath. ‘Do you think… Do you think it’s a sort of vision? Do you think I was shown the future?’
‘I don’t know…’ Wilder said slowly.
‘Perhaps I’m going mad.’
It was only natural to reach for her. He hugged her to his chest, resting his chin on the top of her head. ‘I won’t let that happen.’
He felt the tension ease from her shoulders as her body relaxed against his.
Thea sniffed. ‘How would you stop something like that?’
Wilder gave her a squeeze, for his own reassurance as much as hers. ‘I’m a fucking Warsword, Princess. I can stop whatever I damn well please.’
Thea gave a broken laugh at that. ‘I think that might be wishful thinking.’
‘Apparently I’m all about that.’ Wilder helped her up, regretting the absence of her warmth instantly. ‘Let’s get out of here?’
His apprentice shivered. ‘I thought you’d never ask.’
As they continued the ride, Wilder wondered if he should have asked Torj and Esyllt to permit Thea’s friends to join them. No doubt they could have made light of this dire situation; they were always laughing and carrying on like fools. He and Thea could use some of that energy right about now.
‘What are you hoping happens when we get to Delmira?’ Thea asked him out of nowhere.
Wilder kept his eyes on the trail ahead. ‘It’s a long shot, but… I’m hoping it might trigger some memories for you, or unlock a part of yourself that you buried long ago.’
‘Wouldn’t that have happened when we fought the reapers at the ruins?’
He shrugged. ‘Not necessarily. You didn’t know who you were then.’
‘I still don’t,’ she murmured, the words laced with a vulnerability he was sure she meant to hide.
‘You will.’
‘How can you be so certain? It took me over twenty-four years to discover a single fragment of the truth.’
‘You’ll get there.’
‘How?’
Gods, he wanted to tell her to trust him, that he could feel it in his bones that she would be something great; something the midrealms had never seen before. But those were not the words of a mentor. They were the words of a lover, and he was that no longer, if he had ever truly been.
Instead, he settled for: ‘A hunch, Princess.’
Suddenly, nightmares and half-wraiths were forgotten, because her answering glare at the pet name was searing. ‘That’s hardly helping me.’
Wilder rolled his eyes. ‘What do you think I’ve been doing all this time? Braiding your hair?’
Thea scoffed. ‘I’d like to see you try with those big fingers of yours.’
‘You didn’t seem to mind these big fingers when —’ He cut himself off, instantly horrified. He’d completely forgotten himself. The words had just flown out.
Thea was staring at him, her mouth slightly open.
Heat bloomed in his cheeks and he started to stammer. ‘I – I didn’t mean —’
But Thea only gaped at him a moment longer before she threw her head back and laughed. The sound was rich and deep. She actually clutched her stomach .
‘Here I was thinking you’d forgotten what those fingers have done,’ she said at last, grinning.
He felt a smile tug at his own lips. ‘There’s no forgetting anything with you.’
Then, because he couldn’t stand to be near her for a moment longer without touching her, without kissing her, he filled his gaze with challenge. ‘Race you to the rise?’
Without waiting for her reply, he urged his horse into a gallop, praying that a little distance would quell the roaring within.
He was fucked. Well and truly fucked.
Because the way he burned for her… No vows, no notion of duty – nothing – could stop it.