Chapter 18
JARED
“ I don’t know if this is a good idea.”
My comment was met with silence as I stared up at the huge cliffs of Ko Phi Phi.
Alex and Aiden meant well by keeping me busy after that disturbing news about the break-in back home, but an afternoon climbing the rock face of the island’s tallest mountain wasn’t my idea of reducing my stress.
Lying on the beach, maybe snorkeling, that was distraction.
Not tying a harness around my crotch and rappelling up a cliffside.
The island was unbelievably gorgeous, beautifully undeveloped, and full of dramatic mountains and lush foliage. The steep cliffs led down to beautiful coves and calm waters.
While I could appreciate the scenery, I’d rather do so from the comfort and serenity of the beach.
Alex, on the other hand, was practically giddy at the prospect of climbing, and the closer we got to the meeting point, the more animated he became.
Aiden and I were both stunned at this side of him, and despite my reservations, I was too enamored with Alex’s happiness to say no.
Charlie had arranged for an expert guide to outfit us and lead the climb.
In my yoga tights and t-shirt, with climbing boots that were heavy as hell and a padded helmet, I was strapped into an elaborate harness that made me look like a mini version of a sumo wrestler.
And of course, Aiden and Alex started taking pictures and telling me I looked adorable.
“Adorable? I’ve never been so insulted in all my life,” I grumbled as I stood at the base of the rock face and glared at them.
Of course, they looked hot as fuck. Like professional athletes.
Alex’s tank top showed off his massive biceps, which our Australian instructor, Logan, seemed to be fascinated with. Drooler, aka Logan, took his sweet time getting Alex ready when he was the most experienced of any of us. Alex knew how the equipment worked.
Helping, my ass.
Logan just wanted any excuse to get close to my bodyguard.
I’d never been the jealous type—until now. First Reed and now this guy. I wanted to tell Logan to fuck off.
“I can think of many more pleasurable ways to use rope, and they don’t involve rocks or climbing them,” I muttered.
“Come on, Jared, where’s your sense of adventure? You should film a scene right here. This would make an epic backdrop,” Alex gushed as he slipped on his helmet.
“Epic?” Aiden repeated, shaking his head. “You’ve spent way too much time in L.A., dude .”
“Nothing you can say is going to spoil this afternoon, Aiden. I love rock climbing. I’m so pumped.”
Aiden turned to me with wide eyes, and I just shrugged my shoulders. “I have no idea who Alex is right now, but his smile is worth any amount of suffering I’m about to endure.”
Aiden gave me a wink and nodded in agreement.
“All right, mates, we set to get crackin’?” Logan asked, his broad smile aimed at Alex.
“Hell yes!” Alex clapped his hands together and then high-fived Logan.
“That’s what I like to hear, a man after my own heart,” Logan replied and tapped his chest.
“Let’s go already so I can head back to the beach,” I grumbled.
“Right. I’m going to go first, then Jared, Aiden, and Alex. If at any point you need assistance, call out. Remember, it’s better to take your time and not overreach. Slow and steady.”
I watched as Logan clipped himself to the rope and then began to scale the rock.
He was like a fucking spider, scaling the cliff with ease and speed.
I started next, but it was much more difficult than it looked. I had to stop a few times, but I managed to make it to the top.
And even though Aiden and Alex made it up in half the time that it took me, I had to admit that I had fun. I was wholly focused on my body and the feel of the rock under my palms, just living in the moment and letting everything else fade away for a while.
Now I could understand why Alex loved to do this.
We sat at the top of the formation and had snacks and water and chatted, enjoying the spectacular view. I took more photos, and a selfie of the four of us, then Logan took one of me and Alex and Aiden.
All three of us were hot and sweaty and dusty.
I smiled so wide my jaw ached.
After our break, we slowly made our way down the side of the mountain to a trail that led to the beach.
Alex invited Logan to stay and join us and he enthusiastically agreed.
My earlier jealousy reignited. My stomach pitched as I watched them interact.
Alex and Logan had a lot in common. Was Alex attracted to him? Alex seemed at ease in a way he rarely was with anyone. Then again, I was work, and Aiden was too by association.
You’re just his client, remember? And now, his friend.
Even though I want much more.
I thought about all the time that Alex spent with me. Hell, he lived at my estate in L.A. and rarely went out or had any kind of social life. As much as I wanted him to be mine, I wanted him to be happy. He deserved everything. So did Aiden.
This isn’t just about sex. I want to be around them all the time.
I’m so fucked.
Logan made a joke, and Alex and Aiden laughed.
They could easily hook up with someone like Logan. Fun, easy. They wouldn’t see him after this trip. No problem.
Suddenly all my stupid fantasies that Alex, Aiden, and I would somehow end up together faded like the daylight around me.
You really didn’t think they’d choose you?
Either of them could have any man they wanted. Why would they risk getting involved with me? My life was on public display, and that wasn’t easy on relationships. And right now, my life was a shitshow.
That realization had me quieter than normal. Suddenly I wished I was alone.
By six o’clock, we made it back to the beach.
I was lying on a towel enjoying the last rays of sun while Aiden and Logan swam a few feet away. Alex kept me company for a while and then joined them, and I watched from afar. Alex kept his eye on me the whole time, in between smiles and laughing.
Then I didn’t want to watch at all.
I was about to turn over on my towel when my phone pinged. I thought I had turned off my notifications.
I reached for it and without thinking, tapped on the most recent message.
Unknown number: The break-in was your last warning. I’m watching. And I can get to you. Even on a ship in the middle of the ocean.
I slammed the phone on my towel and looked around as my heart raced out of control.
My lungs seized and I found it difficult to breathe.
My panicked mind spiraled. I stood up and thought about waving to get Alex’s attention, but my arms wouldn’t move.
What could he do anyway?
Nothing.
There was nothing he could do.
This harassment had gone on for over a year and nothing had been done.
I looked over and noticed Alex waving to me, motioning for me to join them in the water. I shook my head, turned, and ran.
And ran. And ran. I didn’t know where I was going, I just needed to run.
I heard someone calling my name (Alex), but I ignored it. I kept going. I ran the whole length of the beach and when I reached the end, I collapsed in the sand.
My lungs burned.
My knees ached.
My heart hurt.
I wanted safety. I wanted Alex and Aiden safe. I couldn’t lose them.
I didn’t even realize I’d started crying until I wiped my face and felt the wetness on my fingers.
“Jared.”
I shook my head, unwilling to look at Alex.
I didn’t want to see him.
I couldn’t deal with this anymore. The frustration of wanting him but not being able to touch him. Of wanting Aiden too.
And knowing that the closer I got to both of them, the harder it would be to walk away with my heart intact.
The knowledge that what had brought us together could also tear us apart.
And it was all my fault.
“You’re fired,” I whispered. “Aiden is too.”
“What?” Alex yelled as he crouched down in front of me.
All I saw were his gorgeous eyes, bluer than the ocean around us. I wanted to lean in close and kiss him, but that was just plain stupid.
“What the fuck just happened? Talk to me.”
“I got a text. He said he’s watching me. He can get to me, even on a ship in the middle of the ocean. I don’t want you or Aiden near me if it puts you both in danger.”
I was hyperventilating, and my vision receded, the edges turning black.
Strong hands pushed my head between my legs. “Cup your hands over your mouth and breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth. Slowly. Do it, Jared.”
I listened to Alex’s command, slowly breathing in and out until I felt my lungs ease. “You don’t need to deal with this anymore. I want you gone.”
“I’m not going anywhere, and neither is Aiden. I don’t care if you fire me, I’m not leaving you.”
“Go. Have fun with Logan. Charlie will escort me back to the ship.”
“No fucking way. I don’t give a shit about Logan. I care about you.”
“Didn’t look that way.”
Shit, I can’t believe I said that. I sounded like a jealous boyfriend.
“He’s fun, uncomplicated. And he’s into you. I’ve been monopolizing every bit of your time for the past year and a half. You need a break. You need to find a man who lights you up. Who makes you smile. You deserve to have a life outside of work.”
Alex sighed and dragged me into his arms.
I should’ve pulled away, but it felt so fucking amazing to be surrounded by his warmth. His strength.
Then, just as quick, he pulled back and gripped my face.
“Jesus, Jared, stop it. I was happy today because I was spending the afternoon with you and Aiden doing something I love. My smile is all about you and him. Not because of Logan. I just met him, for fuck’s sake. He’s a great guy, but I’m not attracted to him.”
“You’re not?” I asked.
“No. And I’m done talking about him. We have more important things to worry about. Like your stalker. Where’s your phone?”
“I dropped it on my towel before I took off.”
Suddenly Aiden appeared by Alex, crouching down beside me. “What happened?”
“Jared had a panic attack. And he tried to fire me and you, because he thinks he knows what’s best for us.”
Aiden shook his head. “What?”
“He got a message from his stalker. And in Jared’s infinite wisdom, he wants us to get out of his life in order to protect us,” Alex explained.
Aiden took one of my hands. “Neither Alex nor I are going anywhere. You’re stuck with us.”
“But—”
“We’ve been over this already. No. Discussion closed.”
Aiden’s commanding voice had me shivering, despite the warmth of the sun on my skin.
“I can’t do this anymore?—”
Alex shook his head. “We will get through this together.”
I looked at Alex and then Aiden. “It’s not just concern about your safety. I mean, I can’t keep denying how I feel about you. About both of you.”