Chapter 33
Chapter Thirty-Three
We get out of the shower and get dressed in silence. There are still so many words left unsaid between us over what I told him only hours ago. I know he’s still processing everything, and what just happened doesn’t actually solve the situation that we’re in.
“I love you,” I say to him again as he pulls a dark green sweater over his T-shirt to fight the chill in the air.
A small smile grows as he responds, “I love you too.” Taking my hand in his, he brings it up to his lips and kisses it. “Want to go for a walk? It’s supposed to rain later, but it’s clear now.”
“Sure, that would be nice.” I put my damp hair up in a claw clip and throw on my oversized pink sweater again.
We step outside the back door, and the chill from the wind instantly greets us.
This has been a bristly September—the leaves have started to fall, and the warmth from the sun is waning as a cool autumn breeze takes its place by the coast. We walk hand in hand on the path that leads into town.
The only sounds around us are the wind, the water, and the odd cry of a seagull flying overhead, eyes scanning for fish or clams to eat.
We make it into Killick Bay, the town as busy as ever on a Sunday.
The streets buzz with people moving between the market and the docks, hauling their freshly caught fish to sell.
“I like this town,” I say to him as I gaze around at all the different vendors selling everything from plants, flowers, and pottery to seafood, fresh-baked bread, and pastries.
Everyone is taking the time to talk to one another, and people seem genuinely happy to be out socializing. It feels similar to Pleasant Cove.
“I like it too,” he tells me. “But sometimes it reminds me of all the things I’ve lost. Raven, my parents…” He drifts off as he stares up the street. “Sometimes I wish I could leave, but I don’t know what else I would do. Being a lighthouse keeper is all I’ve ever known.”
I want to ask so badly about the beautiful pictures he sketches, but I keep my mouth shut. I can imagine one of his pieces hanging on the walls of Pleasant Coffee. But he hasn’t shared that part with me yet, and I want to wait until he feels ready to do so.
“Not that it matters, really,” he quietly adds after a pause, and I squeeze his hand in mine and blink back any tears that threaten to fall.
“I’m sorry, Dylan. I know this is so hard. Everything that’s happened and everything you’re coming to terms with now.”
“Being with you helps,” he murmurs as we keep going, wandering through the crowded streets together. In a sea of people, it feels like it’s just the two of us here right now.
We walk a little more until I spot the familiar steely blue eyes of my new friend coming over to us.
She greets us both with a soft smile, her wild dark hair tied up in the first bun I’ve seen.
It’s the most kept and tidy hairstyle yet.
Today, she’s wearing a loose purple dress with pockets and long sleeves.
Over her top is an acid-wash denim jacket.
“Iris, hi,” I say as I walk over to greet her. Dylan follows and offers a small wave as well. There’s an elephant in the room with us right now, as we all know things but are unsure who knows exactly what.
Her eyes dart back from Dylan to me and then make their way down, eyebrows raised as she spots the clasped hands between us. “Ah,” is all she says as she falls in line beside me and continues to walk with us down the street.
“It’s nice to see you again,” Dylan says as he turns his head to look past me to Iris.
“You too, Dylan,” she responds rather wistfully. She gently touches my arm and leans in to me. “Tell me, dear. Is everyone on the same page now?”
I nod. “Yes, I told him everything this morning.”
“Let’s go sit by the water, then,” she says as she steps in front of us and leads the way down to the docks.
Instead of sitting at our usual bench, she walks to the other end of the dock, where a wooden picnic table sits empty.
She motions for us to sit on one side as she parks herself down on the other, facing us.
She pulls her hair out of its bun and combs her fingers through it, letting it fall past her shoulders and down her back.
“That’s much better,” she sighs as she puts the yellow elastic in her pocket.
Angling her body more toward Dylan, she places a hand on his shoulder.
“Now that you know everything, how are you handling it all?” Her eyes are soft but curious, and her mouth sits in a straight line as she patiently waits for him to answer her.
He doesn’t look away; in fact, he shifts his body more toward her.
I watch as his face displays all the many emotions he’s currently going through—sadness, anger, frustration, even a bit of acceptance creeps in as his shoulders slump and he relaxes into his posture a bit more.
He straightens his head, running a hand through his long brown hair.
“I’m still coming to terms with it, but—” He lets out a breath before continuing. “—I think I’m getting to the point of accepting it.”
“How very hard that must be to do,” Iris responds, her head tilted, like she wasn’t expecting that answer from him.
I squeeze his thigh and blink back my own tears that want to fall. This is not about me, I remind myself as they continue their conversation.
“It brings me some peace to know I saved them,” he adds.
Iris raises a hand and flits it in front of her, as if she’s waving away an invisible fly. “Yes, the brothers. They lived—so Lucy says. Thanks to you.” She pushes her glasses back up the bridge of her long nose, the thick lenses magnifying her eyes even more now.
“Iris,” I start before I can stop myself.
“There has to be something we can do to save Dylan.” I lace my fingers in his and slide over so I’m even closer to him.
“We can’t just accept this. We have the luxury of information now.
Can we find these boys and their family?
Can we tell them to make sure they keep an eye on them?
” How am I the only one who is trying to fight this and change things?
“Can we barricade the edge? We have to do something!” The tears push their way through and fall now as I plead and beg with two people who refuse to listen.
Who refuse to believe that we can change what happens.
“Please,” I add, as my voice quivers. “Please…”
Dylan turns to me and rubs a hand on my cheek. “Luce—”
“There is nothing we can do, dear,” Iris interjects.
“Those boys’ families arrive the same day as the storm.
You said so yourself. There’s no way to warn them.
It’s going to happen whether we’d like it to or not.
We cannot change the past, no matter how much we wish we could.
” She looks away at a fishing boat leaving the dock, and I watch as her fingers move to her ring.
My nostrils flare, and I bring a hand up in front of me, catching her attention once more.
“Just because you didn’t try doesn’t mean we can’t!
” I stand up and walk away. My legs take me across to the other end of the dock, where I sit down and hang my feet over the edge.
Tears are falling, and my rage blurs my vision.
I take deep breaths to try to calm myself down, happy I knew enough to leave before I said something even more damaging than I already did.
Once my heart rate normalizes, Iris comes over and sits beside me. I turn around and see Dylan, still sitting on the picnic table, tracing over the wooden top. She places her thin hands in mine and looks out at the ocean with me. I rest my head on her shoulder, and she sighs.
“You’re right, dear. I didn’t try enough.
But I know that we cannot change what happens.
” She leans over and whispers in my ear.
“Remember, Dylan disappears. You told me that everyone assumes he died, but his body was never found, right?” I lift my head and shift my gaze toward her as she adds, “I don’t know if that means anything, but those are the facts, according to you. ”
She’s right. My head rests on her shoulder once more, feeling the tiniest glimmer of something now.
Maybe it’s hope. Denial? I can’t really be sure.
Maybe I found this lighthouse for a reason.
I’ve always wondered why it was me who saw that bolt from the blue and was able to make it inside and back to 1993.
Now I’m wondering if it’s because I am the type of person who will fight for what and who I love.
Dylan joins us soon after. He places an arm around my shoulder and kisses my forehead as he sits down beside me.
“I know this is hard,” he says as we all stare out at the water, watching the waves lap along the wooden posts that go down to the bottom.
“If you want to leave now, I understand. We don’t have much time together left—”
“Don’t say that, Dylan. I’m not leaving. I would never leave you.”
He doesn’t respond, just pulls me in closer and tucks me into his chest. I feel his heart beating and close my eyes. I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I have to do something.
I have to find a way to save him.