Chapter 24 Rowan #2
He shoots me a smug grin. “I’m an honorary LaFleur now, remember?”
I growl in frustration and rest my head in my hands. “Life was so much easier when you were the emotionally unavailable one.”
“Hey, that was almost douchey. Maybe I do like you better uncorrupted.”
“And I miss the days when you didn’t use words unless you were yelling at someone, back before you developed a sense of humor,” I retort, trying to stifle a smile.
“Come on, man, you know you love the new me. I mean, not as much as you love Claire, especially since she does that thing you like—” I shove him harder this time, and he guffaws loudly when he almost falls off the porch steps.
“Fine, I’m done. For now, anyway,” he says, settling down. “Should I send your girl out?”
“No,” I say reluctantly. “Least I can do is man up and go to her to apologize.” He pats me on the back encouragingly as we both rise to our feet.
Daisy and Claire are at the kitchen sink when we return, and I clear my throat to get their attention. “Ladies, I’m really sorry about the way I acted tonight,” I say after a while. “I was rude to both of you, and I shouldn’t have walked out like that. Most of all, I’m sorry for being dishonest.”
My sister turns back to the sink. “Apology accepted … strange man of loose morals. But you’re still getting a piece of my mind later.”
I struggle to keep a straight face as I stare at Claire, and I’m relieved to see her biting back a smile of her own. “Can we talk?” I ask quietly.
“Think that’s code for something dirty?” Daisy whispers loudly as Landry comes up behind her to wrap his arms around her waist, and Juniper ambles her way closer.
“We should give them some privacy, just in case,” he mumbles near her ear, and I cringe when she giggles and spins in his arms to face him.
He kisses her for a second before he lifts her up to wrap her legs around his waist again.
“We’re going to bed,” he calls out, and Juniper takes her cue to report to her kennel. “Good luck working all your shit out.”
“He means that figuratively, by the way. That was not an invitation for you to fornicate in our spare bedroom,” Daisy says from over his shoulder when they round the corner, and Claire stifles a laugh, drawing my attention back to her.
I heave out a loud sigh. “I’m tempted to ask Coach Reed if he’s willing to rent out Landry’s old bedroom.”
She opens her mouth to speak, then thinks better of it and shakes her head. We’re interrupted by a loud squeal from down the hall, and Claire can’t keep herself from laughing when I scrunch up my nose in disgust. Even Juniper whines from her kennel.
“So … you’re not really a virgin, are you?” she asks after a while. “That’s just something you’ve been telling your sister, right?”
I roll my lips in and lift my shoulders.
“Right?” she repeats, her voice cracking.
“To be fair, I didn’t think I’d still be holding on to that title at my age, especially not longer than my baby sister, but here we are,” I admit.
“How is that even possible?”
“It wasn’t by accident, if that’s what you’re asking,” I say dryly.
She furrows her brow. “Because you’ve been waiting for the right person?”
I shrug again. “Yes, but also the right time, preferably my wedding night.”
“And you nearly let me ruin everything. Shit, Rowan, maybe I already have!” She adds another curse under her breath and looks away.
“You haven’t ruined me. It’s not like that.”
I’m still thinking about that last statement and whether I believe it myself when she reaches out and shoves me in the chest. “You ass, you’ve been letting me make a fool of myself! When were you going to tell me? After the next time I threw myself at you?”
I cringe. “If it makes you feel any better, being celibate is the only thing keeping me from …”
“It doesn’t make me feel any better,” she mumbles. “But I guess some of the stuff you’ve said and done makes a little more sense now.”
“Exactly. All those times I’ve had to pull away were because I needed to and not because I wanted to,” I tell her with a hopeful smile. But she doesn’t smile in return.
“So what’s your excuse for lying to me?”
She pierces my chest with that one, my guilt seeping from the open wound.
“I didn’t intend to keep anything from you. It just … happened. I mean, I tried to tell you, but I couldn’t find the right time.”
She clicks her tongue. “Funny how that works, since you’ve been encouraging me to open up to you and share so many personal …” She shakes her head. “I’ve told you things I’ve never told anyone before. And all this time, you haven’t been honest with me.”
“Claire,” I begin, willing my lungs to expand when my chest tightens again. “I’m sorry.”
“Gah, I can’t believe I was so stupid,” she whines and covers her face with her hands.
“No, no, you haven’t done anything stupid. I’m the one—”
“You’re the one who’s been pretending to care about me just long enough to get my help,” she cuts me off.
“No,” I repeat as I take an involuntary step closer to her. “I do care about you, I swear.”
“All you care about is making sure everyone thinks you’re a saint. But maybe if you spent more energy doing the right thing in the first place, you wouldn’t be so afraid of people finding out who you really are.”
I swallow hard. “I can’t argue with that, at least not the second part.
” She frowns, probably not expecting me to agree with her.
“I never meant to hurt you, though,” I continue.
“I may have been scared to tell you the whole truth, but I still hold all the things you’ve confided in me in my heart.
Your feelings are very, very important to me. ”
Her chest heaves as she pins me with a dangerous glare.
“Well, the jokes on you, then. I don’t have any of those, remember?
” she replies sarcastically, but the trembling in her voice betrays her.
She growls in frustration and blinks back her tears as she turns to shove her feet into her boots, then she storms out, slamming the door behind her.