Chapter 22
Had the situation between James and I been what it had been before I found him in the Fernside sitting room, I would have been excited about the prospect of seeing him again, but as I counted down the days, I became increasingly jittery and apprehensive.
It felt like the weekend was going to be the end of something, rather than the continuation of it, and I wasn’t only talking about my new romantic relationship.
My working life felt destined to receive its heftiest blow so far, too.
Constance might have insisted that the decision to sell the woods started and ended with her, but I didn’t think she could really ignore James’s opinion, and I knew I certainly couldn’t.
‘What are you thinking about?’ she asked me on Thursday morning. ‘You look miles away. You’re not still worried about this business over me selling the woods, are you?’
I’d had my usual early swim, and we were sharing breakfast in the Fernside kitchen. I had no idea how she could sound so blasé about the so-called ‘business over her selling the woods’ when it was keeping me awake at night.
‘No,’ I fibbed, covering my tracks. ‘I was thinking about whether to ask you if I could invite everyone around this evening, but now I’m not so sure I want to.’
‘Why not? They might cheer you up a bit.’
‘I’m sorry I haven’t been the best company this week,’ I apologised.
‘It’s hardly your fault, is it? Don’t you want to see everyone?’
‘Yes and no,’ I said honestly.
Part of me was desperate to forget my troubles and enjoy a fun evening with them all, but the other part was worried that I wouldn’t be able to pull it off.
I hadn’t talked to anyone other than Rick about what had really occurred when James turned up – that he told me he didn’t want the woods to be sold – and I wasn’t sure I’d get through an entire evening without letting something slip.
I had promised myself that I wouldn’t mention anything to anyone until James and I had had an opportunity to talk but with them all together, I might succumb to temptation.
‘Well,’ said Constance. ‘I’d like to see them.’
‘But you’re not going to be here, are you? Unless you’ve changed your mind about going. It’s that Women’s Institute talk tonight, isn’t it?’
‘Oh yes,’ she said. ‘It is. We’re being treated to a riveting talk about Doris’s international tea towel collection.
But you can still go ahead with your plan for here, I don’t mind.
And just think,’ she added, ‘this time next year, I could be heading to the hall in the village to hear you talk to the WI about your business venture, Tilly!’
‘That really would be something, wouldn’t it?’ I attempted to enthuse but fell short. ‘Shall I refresh the pot? This one must have stewed by now.’
In the end, Melody, Kaya, Rick and I decided on a night in the pub instead of a gathering in the garden.
The weather still hadn’t really warmed back up, so evenings were a bit chilly and going there meant Carter could join us for a chat, too.
And of course, The Greenman served perfect pizzas, not that I currently had much of an appetite.
‘Helen was in earlier,’ Carter greeted me, the moment I walked in. ‘She was wondering if you and Constance have got any further with things. She’s so keen for you to—’
Aware that everyone else was right behind me, I vehemently shook my head.
‘Do you mind if we don’t discuss it tonight?’ I asked urgently.
‘Is everything all right?’ he frowned.
‘Yes,’ I blagged. ‘Totally fine, but I haven’t told the others yet and I want to make a real song and dance of it when I do, rather than just dropping it into the conversation.’
Carter tapped the side of his nose and winked. ‘Say no more,’ he grinned. ‘Mum’s the word.’
‘Thanks,’ I smiled, but I hated the deception. ‘I appreciate that.’
What should have been a relaxing evening left me feeling tense and stressed.
Mindful that at any moment I might say the wrong thing, I resorted to asking Kaya to tell us about her most exciting overseas adventures – a topic she could wax lyrical about for hours – and that effectively stemmed all conversation for much of the night.
And put me in everyone else’s bad books because they’d heard it all before.
Early the next morning, I decided not to swim and was immersed in giving the apartment a thorough deep clean that it didn’t really need, when I spotted Constance windmilling with her walking stick on the patio.
‘Are you all right?’ I shouted, as I simultaneously abandoned the vacuum cleaner, snatched open the door and turned down my music.
‘I am,’ she said. ‘I just wanted to check that you are. What are you doing?’
‘Cleaning,’ I told her. ‘I wasn’t in the mood for a swim.’
She raised her eyebrows at that.
‘I just assumed you must be running late following your trip to the pub as I hadn’t seen you go down, but then when James said he couldn’t get hold of you—’
‘James has been trying to ring?’ I quickly checked the call log on my phone. There were half a dozen missed calls registered and they were all from him. ‘Damn.’
I looked back at Constance. My rather panicked reaction had made her eyebrows shoot up even higher and my face flushed in response.
‘He must have been worried that something had happened to you, Constance,’ I gabbled, to explain away my frustrated reaction.
‘Well, if he was, I set his mind to rest when I picked up the house phone the first time he rang it, didn’t I?’
‘Yes,’ I said and put my phone in my pocket. ‘I suppose you did. So, how were the tea towels of the world?’
‘Don’t you want to know what he wanted?’
‘Who?’
‘James!’ she said impatiently. ‘What’s the matter with you this morning?’
‘Sorry,’ I said, striking my forehead with my palm in a gesture I’d never used before. ‘Yes, what did he want?’
‘To let us know that he won’t be arriving until after lunch tomorrow,’ Constance informed me. ‘He’d booked the whole of the weekend off, but he’s out of favour with his boss, for some reason, and he’s now got to attend a meeting in the morning.’
‘I daresay his boss is still smarting over that extra pro bono case James has taken on,’ I said aloud. ‘I don’t think he was happy about that.’
‘He’s told you about that aspect of his work, has he?’ Constance asked, and I realised I probably should have kept that knowledge to myself.
Constance knew James and I had talked on the phone a little but had most likely assumed that what we’d discussed was her recovery following her fall and anything pertaining to Fernside, rather than what his work involved.
‘Just briefly,’ I shrugged. ‘His work came up in conversation one day.’
‘So, what else has come up?’ she asked. ‘Have you now told him about your plans for the woods?’
‘No,’ I said. ‘Not yet. We decided it would be better to talk about all that in person.’
‘Right,’ she said, drawing the word out. ‘I suppose that makes sense, but you won’t let him talk you out of buying, will you, Tilly? He can be very persuasive.’
‘I daresay that’s part of his job,’ I commented.
‘I would imagine you’re right, but you mustn’t be swayed. My decision to sell the woods is solely for his benefit and the sooner he accepts that, the better it will be for everyone concerned.’
I was still adamant that I wasn’t going to come between the two of them, but I didn’t want to get further into it with Constance while standing on the doorstep. We’d talk properly about it once I’d heard from James’s own lips his reasons for not wanting her to sell.
‘Duly noted,’ I said briskly, cutting the topic off. ‘Now, if you don’t mind, I was hoping to get finished in here before breakfast.’
‘Did the place really need such a thorough going over?’ she asked and peered over my shoulder. ‘It’s sounded like you’ve been at it for hours.’
‘No harm in keeping on top of things, and it’s such a pretty place, it deserves to look its best.’
‘An ethos, thanks to you, that I’m adopting for the rest of the house now.’ She smiled. ‘All right,’ she accepted. ‘Just don’t work too hard. You need to save your energy for getting your business up and running.’
‘Don’t worry about that,’ I told her. ‘I’ve got plenty in reserve.’
The moment she’d gone, I closed the door and picked up my phone again. I was tempted to call James back but knew that if his boss was in the vicinity and James hadn’t turned the ringtone down, that would be another mark blotting his copybook.
‘Zack,’ I said, when I tried my brother instead, ‘can you give me a call when you get this message? I could do with a chat. It won’t matter what time it is. I hope you’re okay. Love you.’
I went back to the vacuuming wondering which of the two main men in my life I was going to hear from first.
It was the sound of Buddy barking soon after lunchtime the next day that answered that question. I’d heard nothing from my brother yet, so James had beaten him to the punch. Assuming we talked before Zack called.
Had James not been Constance’s nephew but rather simply someone I was dating who I had invited up for the weekend, I would have rushed outside to greet him and pulled him in close for the longest kiss, but that fantasy had long since flown.
Now I stayed put and waited, with mixed emotions, for him to seek me out.
It was getting on for the end of the afternoon before he eventually knocked, and I felt my heart kick as I opened the apartment door and saw him standing there.
‘James,’ I breathed. ‘Hello.’ The sight of him prompted the strongest tug of attraction, and it was further heightened because he was wearing the same shirt he’d had on the day we’d met in Cambridge and had our first proper kiss. ‘Would you like to come in?’
I opened the door wider, but he didn’t move.
‘Hey, Tilly,’ he said, his voice thick in his throat and his hands shoved deep in his shorts pockets. ‘Thanks, but I’d better not. Aunt Constance is waiting to continue our so-called conversation. I just wanted to let you know I’m here.’