Chapter 17
Lyrian
Sunlight streamed through the medical wing's windows as I sorted through intelligence reports at my makeshift desk. Mae had converted one of her private rooms into a comfortable living space, though it wasn't quite home. Nothing other than it could be.
A week had passed since I'd left our private quarters, and while Zoren's presence lingered at the edges of the compound, he'd respected my need for space. I knew he was going to. He knew he had fucked up.
"Your blood pressure's still higher than I'd like," Mae said, reviewing my morning checkup results. "The twins are fine, but you need to manage your stress better."
I nodded, only half-listening as I studied Lieutenant Rodriguez's latest report. Something about the patterns of recent gang movements didn't sit right with me. "Has Chen's team verified these shipping manifests?"
"Lyrian." Mae's tone sharpened. "Did you hear what I said? High blood pressure at seven months with twins isn't something to ignore."
"I heard you." I placed a hand on my swollen belly, feeling the twins' restless movements. They'd been more active lately, perhaps sensing my unease. They could feel things about me I thought they couldn't. "But this is important. These manifests don't match what we're seeing on the ground."
She sighed but pulled up a chair. Over the past week, she'd become both my medical guardian and unofficial confidante, and I was happy about it. Without her, I wouldn’t have anyone trustworthy to talk to about my life problems. "Talk me through it."
"Look here." I pointed to the shipping dates. "Three separate gangs are moving large shipments through neutral territory on the same night. That never happens. They're coordinating something."
"Could be a coincidence?"
I shook my head. "Not with the emotional signatures I've been picking up. There's too much anticipation, too much carefully contained excitement among the lower ranks. Something big is coming."
A knock interrupted us. Lieutenant Chen entered, carrying fresh reports. "Sir, we've confirmed your suspicions about the Rivera family's recent movements. They're definitely mobilizing."
"Show me," I said, pushing aside the manifests. Chen spread out a series of surveillance photos, each showing key Rivera lieutenants meeting with other gang leaders.
My head throbbed as I extended my empathic senses, trying to piece together the fragments of information. The twins kicked sharply, and I winced. They were trying to tell me something.
"That's enough," Mae said firmly, noticing my discomfort. "You need rest."
"Just... give me a minute." I closed my eyes, focusing on the emotional echoes I'd picked up from various gang members over the past weeks. Fear. Anticipation. Loyalty shifting like sand... My eyes snapped open. "It's not just against us. They're making a play against everyone. The Riveras, the Vipers, all of them are working together."
"Against who?" Chen asked.
"The old families. All of them. Including the Crimson Fangs." The realization made my blood run cold. The bastards dared to do that? "They're planning to take out the established leadership and reshape the entire power structure."
Chen cursed softly. "When?"
"Soon. Very soon." Another sharp pain hit, and I couldn't hide my grimace this time.
"That's it," Mae declared, physically moving between me and the reports. "You need to lie down. Now."
"Mae—"
"Your blood pressure is spiking and you're showing signs of early contractions. Do you want to explain to Zoren why you're in premature labor?"
The mention of Zoren made my chest ache. Despite our separation, I felt his constant worry from across the compound. He was hurting, and so was I, but we needed this time apart. We needed to figure out how to be true partners.
And that was the reason why I didn't want him to come over. I didn't want to talk to him right now.
"Fine," I conceded, allowing Mae to help me to the bed. "But Chen, get this information to Santos right away. We need to—"
"We need to monitor your vitals for the next hour," Mae interrupted. "Lieutenant Chen can handle the intelligence. Right?" She fixed Chen with a stern look.
"Of course." Chen gathered the reports. "I'll coordinate with Santos and increase surveillance on all suspected parties. You focus on staying healthy, sir." I'm going to try, I thought to myself.
I wanted to argue, but another wave of discomfort silenced me. Mae attached monitors to my belly, checking the twins' heartbeats. She was so worried about them, almost as much as I was.
"They're stressed," she murmured. "Just like their father."
"Which one?" I tried to joke, but it fell flat.
"Both of you." She adjusted something on the monitors. "He asks about you, you know. Every day."
"I know." I could feel his love and worry constantly. "But he needs to understand. I can't be kept in a cage, even a loving one. Plus, I want to help, just like I'm helping now."
"And you need to understand that your health affects more than just you now." Mae's voice softened. "These babies need both their fathers healthy and united." I was aware of that, but what she was asking of me was difficult.
I stared at the ceiling, feeling the twins settle as the medication Mae administered began to work. She was right, of course. This separation wasn't sustainable, especially with a major threat looming. But Zoren needed to see me as an equal, not just something precious to protect.
I knew he was going to understand that soon. He just needed some time.
"Get some rest," Mae said, dimming the lights. "The intelligence will wait an hour."
As she left, I placed both hands on my stomach, reaching out with my abilities to soothe the twins. Their emotional signatures were becoming more distinct as they grew—one calm and steady, the other fierce and protective. Like both their fathers.
A familiar presence appeared at the edge of my awareness. Zoren, doing his nightly check of the compound. His worry spiked when he sensed my distress, but he didn't come closer. He was trying to respect my boundaries, even though it hurt him.
He could kind of feel me, but not much more than that because he wasn't anything like me. That wasn't his strength.
"Your father loves us," I whispered to the twins. "He loves us so much he forgets we're strong too. But it's going to be okay. He will understand, eventually."
The intelligence reports waited on my desk, full of warnings about the coming storm. I needed to be ready. We all did.
The next morning, despite Mae's protests, I was back at my desk. The medication had helped, and the twins were calmer, but I couldn't ignore the growing threat. Not when I could feel waves of anticipation and malice rolling through the compound from our enemies' spies.
Sometimes, it was overwhelming. Not right now, thankfully.
"At least let me set up proper monitoring," Mae insisted, arranging medical equipment around my workspace. "And promise you'll stop if anything feels wrong."
"I promise," I agreed, already spreading out the latest reports. My makeshift command center in the medical wing wasn't ideal, but it allowed me to balance my health with my work. The twins kicked, seemingly approving of the compromise. Their reaction helped me.
Santos arrived with his morning update, his usual stoic demeanor tinged with concern. "Three more gangs have joined the coalition," he reported, his tone serious. "They're meeting tonight at the old foundry."
I closed my eyes, extending my senses carefully. Even at this distance, I could pick up fragments of emotions from our surveillance teams. "They're nervous. Something's changed in the plans."
"Sir?" Santos leaned forward.
"The lower-ranked members... there's fear mixing with their anticipation now. The leadership is rushing things." I pressed deeper, ignoring the slight headache building behind my eyes. "They know we're onto them. They're going to move sooner than planned, and we need to do something about it."
The monitoring equipment beeped in warning, and Mae shot me a sharp look. I pulled back my abilities, taking slow breaths until the readings stabilized. "Sorry," I murmured to the twins, feeling their agitation.
"We need to inform Zoren," Santos said, watching my reaction.
"Already done." I nodded toward Chen, who'd just entered. "Lieutenant?"
"The boss is increasing security and alerting our allies," she confirmed. "But he wants your input on the response strategy."
I sighed. Of course he did. Even keeping his distance, Zoren knew my abilities were vital now. I'd proven my worth not just as his mate, but as a valuable asset to the cartel. The thought brought both satisfaction and sadness.
I wished things were different, that we didn’t have to navigate the drama we were facing, but I supposed there was nothing that could be done about it.
"Tell him—" A sharp pain cut through my abdomen, making me gasp. It was unexpected. It just happened all of a sudden.
Mae was beside me instantly, checking monitors. "Blood pressure's rising again. You need to rest. You need to rest more often, in fact."
"Not now," I gritted out. "Chen, tell Zoren they're planning to hit multiple locations at the same time. They'll try to divide our forces and create chaos. But the main target..." I pressed my abilities outward one last time, fighting through the discomfort. "The main target is him. They think if they take out the leadership, our old alliances will crumble."
The twins kicked, and this time I couldn't hide my wince. Mae started to intervene, but I held up a hand. She didn't need to worry so much. "I'm fine. Just... give me a moment. I'm going to be okay."
"You're not fine," she snapped. "Your body is telling you to stop, and you need to listen."
She was right. I could feel the strain taking its toll, not just on me but on the twins too. They were so sensitive to my emotional state and to my use of abilities. Just like their father had warned.
I supposed there were some things I should have listened to when he tried to warn me.
Zoren. Even now, I could feel his constant presence at the edges of my awareness, worried but restraining himself from interfering. He was trying so hard to respect my independence while protecting me from a distance.
His behavior surprised me; I thought he was going to be more brash.
"Sir?" Chen's voice was gentle. "We can handle the tactical response. You've given us enough to work with."
I wanted to argue, to push through, to prove I could do more. But wasn't that exactly what had driven the wedge between Zoren and me? My need to prove myself versus his need to protect me?
And internally, I responded to myself that yes, that was exactly what happened.
"Okay," I conceded, allowing Mae to help me to the bed. "But keep me updated. And tell Zoren..." I paused, choosing my words carefully. "Tell him I understand now. Balance doesn't mean choosing between independence and protection. It means finding a way to have both."
As my team filed out, Mae adjusted my monitors. "That's the smartest thing you've said all week."
Her words brought a smile to my face. More often than not, she knew just what to say to me.
"I'm learning." I placed both hands on my stomach, feeling the twins gradually calm. Noticing that brought relief to me. "We all are."
"He misses you," she said softly. "I see him every night, watching the medical wing from his office. He's trying to give you space, but it's killing him."
What she told me wasn't anything new, but it felt different hearing it from her.
"I miss him too." The admission came easily. "But we needed this. I needed to prove I could be valuable beyond being his mate, and he needed to see he couldn't keep me locked away from everything."
"And now?"
I thought about the coming threat, about how Zoren and I had both been right and wrong. "Now we need to find a middle ground. I can't ignore my limitations, especially not with the twins. But he can't ignore my strengths either."
Mae smiled. "So, what are you going to do about it?"
Good question. I was going to have to think about it.
And before I could answer, another presence brushed against my consciousness. Zoren, closer than he'd been all week. His worry and love washed over me, along with something new—understanding. He was finally ready.
"Mae," I said, not taking my eyes off the door, "could you give us a moment?"
She followed my gaze and nodded, gathering her equipment. As usual, she understood me. I didn't have to overexplain what I was thinking.
"Ten minutes. Any sign of distress and I'm coming back in, relationship drama or not." I smiled at that. She was so overprotective.
The door had barely closed behind her when Zoren appeared. He looked tired and worried, but his eyes softened when they met mine. The twins kicked with pure excitement, sensing their father's presence.
"You feel it too, don't you?" I asked.
He nodded, moving closer but still maintaining a careful distance. "Thanks to your warning, we're prepared. But that's not why I'm here."
"I know." I held out my hand, and he took it immediately, sitting beside me on the bed. We hadn't been this close in a while, and it felt like indulging in chocolate after months without it. "We need to talk about us and what we can do to make both of us happy."
"Yes," he agreed, his thumb tracing circles on my palm. "I can't stop wanting to protect you. But I also can't deny how valuable your abilities are, how much stronger we are together."
"And I can't ignore the risks," I admitted. "Not with the twins. Not with everything at stake. But I need to be your partner, Zoren. I just don't want to be something you protect. I need to be more than that. I need to be someone you can come to for help."
He brought my hand to his lips, kissing it softly. "You always have been. I just... forgot that sometimes, in my fear of losing you."
The twins kicked again, and this time we both smiled. "They miss you too," I said. "We all do."
"Come home," he whispered. "We'll figure out the details, and set new boundaries that work for both of us. But come home."
I studied his face, feeling the sincerity in his emotions. "As equals?"
"As equals," he promised. "Always."
Then I thought I knew the answer and that I approved of it.