27. Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Raif
I t’s clear Ash is nervous, but Raif maintains his distance. He doesn’t want to crowd her or make her feel like he’s pushing her towards a relationship. She wrings her hands, elbows on her knees, and it reminds him of the last time they talked on this couch.
“I...I like you, Raif. A lot. I just...this is hard for me.”
He nods in understanding.
“I know you said before that feelings and attraction are different for you. Are you attracted to me?”
She looks at him, eyes locked, and licks her top lip. “Yeah, I am.”
“I’m attracted to you, too. And I...I have feelings for you, Ash. Feelings I’ve never had for anyone before.”
She looks away, head dropping down towards her feet.
“I have feelings for you, too, Raif.”
It’s quiet, almost a whisper, and he wonders what it means that she’s saying it so quietly.
“I want to be with you, Ash. I’ve never felt like this before. I think we could be good together, really good.”
“Me too,” she says with her head still hanging down.
“What’s the issue then? Why do you look so miserable right now?”
She huffs out a laugh and wipes tears from her eyes, sitting back up and leaning against the back of the couch to look at him.
“I’m scared.”
He takes a second to look at her. Even with tears in her eyes and concern etched on her face, she’s beautiful.
He wants to kiss away her worries, but knows they need to talk, they can’t just keep kissing and hope things work out.
He takes a deep breath. Words are generally hard for him.
He’s never had to really talk about his feelings with anyone, and the things he’s said to Ash are the most emotions he’s revealed since his dad died.
“I understand you’re scared. You lost the last person you loved.
I will never replace James, and I don’t want to.
He holds a special place in your heart, and I am thankful for everything you two had together because it made you the person here in front of me now.
What do you think James would say to you now? ”
She laughs and wipes more tears from her eyes.
“He’d tell me to suck it up. That I have someone great who cares about me, and that it’s time to move on.”
“And do you think it is? Time to move on?”
Raif holds his breath. She looks at him like she’s looking into his soul. Her eyes are glassy from crying, but there’s a strength there that he admires.
“I think,” she blows out a big breath. “I think it’s been five years since he died. And I never thought I would meet someone else I wanted to be with, until you. I want to move on, Raif. I want to do that with you.”
His smile is huge, he knows it is. He probably looks goofy as fuck right now, but he doesn’t care.
“So what do you want to happen with us?”
She fiddles with her fingers and looks down, a small blush blossoming on her face.
“Can I tell you what I’d like to happen? And you tell me if that’s anything you want.”
She nods and smiles.
“I want to be with you. I want to be your boyfriend, or whatever label you want to put on it. I want us to be in a relationship, just the two of us, for as long as you’ll have me.
” He pauses, not sure how to say the next part.
“I want you to let me in. Let me take care of you and let me...love you. I want to be with you in every way possible. Ash, I want everything you’ll give me. ”
He suddenly has a lap full of Ash, and he wraps his arms around her waist. She’s straddling him, and she’s buried her face in his neck, and his bear puffs up at the idea that his mate might be scenting him.
“Yes, Raif. Yes, I want all those things. I want to be yours, and you be mine. I want everything with you.”
They smile at each other, and then she kisses him.
It’s not slow and chaste like previous kisses.
This is frantic, like she’s worried he’ll leave, and he pours in everything he can into the kiss to reassure her.
Her hands are all over, in his hair, over his arms, down his chest. Till she’s pulling at the hem of his shirt.
He pulls back, and she pushes it up his stomach, her palm softly touches his abs, and he can’t help the jump in his muscles at her touch.
She pushes his shirt up higher to touch his chest, and then she’s lifting it with both hands till he pulls it off.
She just looks at him, and he tries not to squirm under her gaze.
His bear preens at her gaze. He knows he’s built.
Part is being a bear shifter, and the other part is that he uses his body to move heavy shit a lot.
Her hands run through his chest hair, nails scratching at the skin.
His hands stay planted at her waist as he lets her explore his body.
She leans forward, planting a chaste kiss on his chest. Then another and another.
When she takes a nipple in her mouth, he can’t help but buck up.
He’s never played with his nipples, they seemed pointless.
But now, as she sucks and bites on him, he can feel himself leaking in his pants. He's so hard.
He pulls her back up to kiss because he can’t take any more of the attention on his chest. Their tongues battle for dominance as she continues to run her hands all over his upper half. Till he feels her one hand drift lower. He tenses, not sure what she’s doing as she goes for his belt.
“Is this okay?” she asks him.
“What are you doing?” He swallows audibly as her hands start to work on his belt.
“I want to make you feel good. Do you want me to stop?”
She leans forward and mouths at his neck, capturing his earlobe and nipping at it. He can’t help the whine that comes out of him when she sucks on his neck.
“Only if you want to.”
Her hands undo the button on his jeans and move to the zipper. She pulls back and looks down at him, and he can’t help but lock his eyes on her hands. The zipper clicks downward, and he takes in a big breath. When she parts the material, his cock is right there for her to see, having gone commando.
He hears her suck in a breath, and then one finger is stroking up and down his length. It takes all his will not to come right then. She’s going to be the death of him.