Chapter 14

The Group Chat

Vince

Vince: Hey. Question. Hypothetically, how do you stop yourself from falling in love?

Gary: Vince.

Wayne: Great. Another hypothetical. Have you tried telling Sam about Andy?

Vince: Sam already knows about Andy.

Wayne: Sam does not KNOW about Andy. What'd you tell her?

Eli: Hook me up with Andy. Problem solved.

Gary: We’ve been over this, hun. The answer is to walk away.

Aubrey: Can we add Andrew to the group chat?

Cynthia: YES!

Eli: Make sure to share the chat history.

Vince: Holy shit, is that a thing?

Vince: Don't add him. Please.

Vince: How is that a solution, adding him to our group chat, Aubrey?

Frank: I actually do think adding him will help, Vince...

Gary: I’m not sharing our chat history, Eli. Stop scaring him.

Vince: Don't add him.

Frank: Can you all at least agree to behave once he’s added? You'll scare him off.

Eli: Absolutely not.

Aubrey: That’s no fun.

Vince: Don't. Add. Him.

Todd: I can't believe this is happening.

Gary has added Andrew Parker to Campers Group Chat.

Andrew: Hi?

Aubrey: Aaaaah. Omg I’m so excited you’re on here.

Wayne: Hi Andy. You’re really going to regret being on this group, dude.

Eli: Hi Andy.

Cynthia: Welcome Andy!

Andrew: It’s Andrew, actually.

Todd: I'm living for this.

Wayne: Why is Vince is always calling you Andy?

Andrew: I don’t know. He’s kind of a dork.

Frank: Good to know you're big on boundaries, Vince.

Aubrey: Vince really is a huge dork.

Vince: I’ll show you something huge, Aubrey.

Andrew: You joke about that a lot, Vince. Overcompensating for something?

Wayne: Hahahaha

Cynthia: YES

Vince: No. I’m not.

Vince: I’m not overcompensating.

Eli: Your car supports this theory, my man.

Andrew: If Vince’s car isn’t overcompensating for something, I don’t know what is.

Wayne: Dude is straight roasting you, Vince.

Gary: Can we stop being rude in the group chat?

Vince: Andy, I hate you.

Aubrey: Well now, that’s not what you said earlier.

Cynthia: Not at all what he said earlier.

Andrew: What did he say earlier?

Vince: Stop. I'm serious.

Eli: We like you Andrew. You’ll fit in here.

Aubrey: Come to the campout, pretty please!

Andrew: I'll be there!

Frank: Welcome to the group, Andrew.

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