Chapter 26

The Group Chat

Vince

Vince: Can you still ground your kid if they’re almost eighteen?

Vince: My oldest is out of control.

Vince: I just had to call the cops on her for taking my car to get it back.

Cynthia: Seriously?

Eli: You're the only one here with kids, man. Good luck getting proper advice.

Todd: Eli is such a good friend.

Aubrey: Eli tried to dance with Wayne at Tony’s Nightclub last night and ended up getting kicked out by the bouncers.

Eli: Shut up, both of you.

Wayne: I told him to stop, and he doubled down. I didn’t have a choice but to flag them down.

Aubrey: Did it hurt when they threw you onto the curb for spitting at them, Eli?

Eli: Did it hurt when Todd broke up with you for being a bad lay back in high school, Aubrey?

Wayne: What?

Cynthia: Eli...

Todd: Are you serious?

Gary: Eli, that’s enough.

Eli: Did it hurt when Todd wouldn’t dance with you on the stage last night and you had to suck off some other dude in the bathroom instead?

Frank: Eli, you’re about to get kicked off the group chat.

Eli: Did it hurt being the shortest guy dancing on stage? Did they even give you the height clearance to be up there?

Aubrey: I hate you.

Eli: I hate you too.

Eli: You have no right to talk to me the way you do.

Eli: I don’t know why you think you’re so much better than me, and I’m tired of putting up with you.

Aubrey: You’re the one who’s bullying me!!!

Aubrey: Todd, say something!

Gary: You’re all acting like children. Can we calm down, please?

Andrew: Vince, message me and I’ll help you with advice on Malia.

Vince: Thank you, Andy. :) :) :)

Andrew: You’re welcome.

Vince: :)

Cynthia: That’s an alarming level of smiley faces for you there, Vince.

Wayne: Cute.

Gary: Aww, look how adorable Vince is.

Vince: Stop.

Cynthia: I approve of every single smiley.

Wayne: Ten bucks says he's blushing.

Vince: Stop.

Andrew: ....lol

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