Chapter 38
THIRTY-EIGHT
Greesha
The silence holds a different kind of oppression this time.
It’s not burdening. It isn’t agitating. It’s just... silence born out of acceptance. I stare at him—leaning against the door I just shut.
“He just won’t let you... be.”
Advik’s whisper is a mix of excruciating realization and pain. He’s sitting at the edge of his bed, gazing at nothing. His eyes flitting about—as if trying to find a viable reason. But he won’t turn his eyes to me.
I also notice how he doesn’t say, ‘he just won’t let you go’. Just be. And it’s the truth. Viraj has probably concocted a reality that doesn’t include my wishes anymore.
And for the past however many minutes, Advik has come to the same conclusion.
“We will find the perfect trap—”
“No,” Advik snaps, jumping up from his bed.
He walks over to me but his eyes fail to share my panic.
Look at me!
He doesn’t.
“I will... meet that CBI guy,” his jaw clenches. “You will be there. As my protection. And... we will get this shit over with.”
I watch him as he struggles for words that sound diplomatic enough. But I also realize that he doesn’t understand the lengths I’m willing to go—to protect his stupid ass.
“No,” I whisper—causing his beautiful eyes to finally land on me.
He’s frowning but I don’t want him to be conflicted about this.
“We will give ourselves another... week, Vik. Maybe two. But we’re not trapping Mehul this way. You won’t be—”
“Greesha...” he cuts me off with a plea. “Viraj will convince Dev to do it instead. Just... let me.”
My eyes bug out. “He said that?”
Advik gives me a sad smile. “He... implied that, baby.”
I begin to shake my head, but my panic falters as he steps closer. I don’t feel like I’m being caged. Instead, I feel cocooned. Comforted. And it’s terrifying.
“Dev can’t do this, Gree. And I know he’ll want to—especially if Viraj says the things he did to me,” he says, his hand resting lightly on my waist—hesitant. And I know why he’s saying that. But I can’t seem to find a better reason to refute his assertion.
“I heard you both,” he adds. “I heard everything. And Viraj might not care about those kids—but I do. You do, too.”
My eyes squeeze shut. He’s right. I do fucking care. But tell that to my heart that’s beating too loudly at the possibility of risking Advik’s life to save them somehow.
“I can do this.” He steps impossibly close—resting his forehead on mine.
I move my head side to side. “You can’t. It’s meant to be a trap so you will actually have to be fully exposed to Mehul’s people. I can’t... I won’t be able to properly p-protect you.”
His grip tightens on my waist at my fumble. Then he slowly moves his hands upward—caressing my arms and then settling on my cheeks. “It’ll be fine. I trust you.”
“No,” I try to summon my authoritative voice but it falls short. Instead it comes out as a plea. What the fuck is he doing to me?
He smirks weakly. “What—I don’t trust you? Baby, I do. I trust you with everything...”
He knows that’s not what I meant but he continues the brutal assault to my heart with his next words.
“With my heart.” He places a gentle kiss on my forehead. “With my love.” He kisses my scar. “I trust you.” And with the softest peck to my lips, he says, “With my life.”
I groan impatiently—almost as if I wanted to deepen the kiss when he retreated instead. I rest my hands on his chest, not to shove him away—but to feel the erratic rhythm of his heartbeat. His breath warm on my lips.
My hands clutch his t-shirt tightly. “You... you’re being a self-sacrificing moron again. I won’t let you do this.”
Tears form at his next words. “Oh meri Greesha, I know I can’t stop you. But I’m not being careless with my life. Not like last time.” (Oh my Greesha)
Last time...
When he tried to kill himself? Or when he took a bullet for me? Regardless of what he meant, he’s still willing to walk into danger. No—run into it.
“You are being careless if you’re willingly taking the risk. You’re suicidal and—”
“Was. I was, baby. Not anymore. I promised you,” he whispers against my lips.
My heart clenches. He’s going to do this with or without me. Because he wants to keep Dev out of this. Because he wants to stop the operation before more kids suffer.
“This... this is your savior complex talking,” I retort weakly—my voice thick with tears.
I’m trying my hardest to change his stupid mind. But I can see it in his eyes—it’s not working. There’s a rare gleam of fierce determination there that makes my stomach drop.
“Maybe...” he relents softly as my panic comes back full-force. “Or maybe it’s just something I want to do knowing you’ll be right there. Protecting me.”
I shake my head frantically. The tears I’ve been holding back start to blur my vision of his ravaged face. “No.”
“Baby—”
“Please.”
The word claws out of my chest—raw and desperate.
My vision clears and I realize—horrifically—it’s because the tears are now falling.
Unrelenting. Unforgiving.
He tries to wipe them away, but I keep shaking my head.
My knees grow weaker when I realize—I’m not the only one crying.
I can’t lose him.
I know I can’t fucking lose this man to death.
I don’t even want to risk it. The fear is lodged deep in my chest now, stealing every ounce of air.
“Please...”
“Gree,” he whispers, his face crumpling.
“Please,” I try again, just as my legs give out and I slide down the door behind me.
I don’t sob. I don’t wail.
I just... sink.
Advik drops with me, holding on to my body like it’s the only wreckage worth surviving.
He’s panicking now too.
His eyes search mine, frantic and tormented.
“I’ve got you, baby.” He holds me tighter. “And you’ve got me.”
I keep whispering that one word like a prayer I’m too late to make.
And he keeps whispering back reassurances like he still believes we’ll be okay.