Chapter 10
You’d think I’d be used to this by now—that it’d be easy. It wasn’t. I smiled cheerily at the young coordinator who read me the rules and explained the breeding party like this wasn’t my fifth time doing it.
No touching, no kissing, do not remove the mask. When your heat is done, push the button twice.
I could’ve read it back to her from memory. The familiarity of the cozy room and waterproof mattress made me sick. Four times I’d been here. Four times they’d forced a heat on me, so I could be ravaged again and again in the hopes of achieving a pregnancy. Four times—and I was about to do it again. Only this would be my last shot.
The coordinator blushed prettily as she stumbled over her words. Soft brown hair fell past her shoulders, framing a long stately face. What gave them the right to deny her access to the breeding program? As she wrapped up her speech, I smiled reassuringly at her.
Her answering smile was nervous, and she turned to her clipboard, holding it in front of her like a shield.
“Okay, next you’ll breathe in the contents of this vial”—she reached into the pocket of her lab coat and pulled out a familiar glass vial. I noted the pocket—“holding it in your lungs for as long as possible. This is what will start your heat. Then I’ll leave the room, and it’ll start in about five minutes. When you feel ready to receive your first breeder, you can press the button there three times.”
I pretended to listen intently and nodded my head like she wanted.
Smiling patiently at me, she said, “Are you ready?”
“Thank you. You’ve been so nice to me.” With a watery smile, I reached out and hugged the coordinator, catching her by surprise, and she nervously moved into my embrace. I waited until she hugged me back before deftly slipping a hand into her coat pocket and retrieving one of the vials.
The coordinator stiffened and gave me an awkward pat on the back. This was too easy. We broke apart, and I gave an enormous sigh of relief at being nearly done. The coordinator held the vial out to me.
I took the stoppered glass vial with the purple flowers inside and opened it, holding it under my nose and filling my lungs with its flowery scent. At least this shit smelled better than the air fresheners back in our dorms, and its effects were near instant—a soothing sense of relaxation softening the tension in my muscles.
“Good luck,” the girl said almost gleefully as she headed out of the room, leaving me naked and strapped to the hospital bed.
After she left, those damnable tears creeped into my eyes. Why did this have to be so hard? Why couldn’t I just get pregnant on my first cycle and maintain my dignity instead of having to go through this again and again?
My shoulders shook with the force of my sobs even as the arousal kicked in. Then I was angrily shaking out my shoulders and swiping at the tears on my face. I hadn’t come here to cry. Administrator Sampson had told me to make this one count, and I fucking would.
The heat was starting, a burning fire spreading through my core, and I leaned over to press the button exactly three times.
Undressing in a hurry and tucking a towel around my waist, I fought to steady my nerves. My hands were shaking. This was it. I thought I’d be late, that I’d walk in and have to choose whatever shit mask was left, but I was wrong.
Instead, I found one other nervous guy with short brown hair leaning forward on his knees, naked, with a towel across his legs. His foot bounced, nearly revealing what he hid beneath the towel, and he looked up at me with a watery smile.
“First time?” I asked him, and he nodded, not volunteering any more information.
That was fine with me.
The mask he held wasn’t the stag, so I stepped up to the table in the center of the room. A variety of animal faces were placed proudly on display. Some were brushed with gold paint, while others were a matte black that seemed to absorb any surrounding light.
Taking in the array of masks, I pretended to peruse the selection while searching for the one I had already selected for myself. There were more masks than there were breeders and I wondered about that, but as I hadn’t been briefed on this part of the process before, I dared not ask the other first timer lest I give myself away.
I found my mask at the end of the row; the gold shining off its antlers drawing me in. Its perfectly regal face outshining all the rest.
Tonight, I would be Syl’s stag.
Glancing nervously behind me to see if any new guys had entered the room, I grabbed the mask off the table and tucked it under my arm and went to sit on the bench across from the other man. I’d worn my towel tucked around my waist, assuming that was how they wanted it, but seeing the other first timer and noting the clean paper running along the wooden bench, I removed the towel to sit on the paper and laid the towel across my legs.
I placed the mask on my lap, staring into the hollow eyes of the stag and wondering what Syl would see at our first meeting. How good it would feel to press into her and relieve the heat consuming her body, mind and soul. Getting to know her would come later.
First, I would make her mine. My body would own hers. I didn’t care what the other breeders looked like or who they were. I knew there was something between Syl and me, and I couldn’t wait to see it revealed.
A man with shaggy blonde hair burst his way into the room, breathing hard and clutching a hawk’s mask to his chest. Even in my state of agitation, I thought it strange he’d chosen to bring his own mask when others were set out for our use. I watched as the man sat down a few feet away from me on the bench, tipping his head back with a sigh.
The rest of the breeders came in as a rowdy group of beefy men who walked past my position without looking, heading straight for the masks. I recognized the asshole who had hurt Syl, and my hand tightened painfully on my knee.
“Yeah man, well, it’s not like we can’t fuck her whenever and wherever we want, anyway. Breeding parties aren’t very exciting when the girl gives it away every chance she gets.” His laughter didn’t reach me, the sound disconnected from the rage pounding in my head.
This fucking asshole thinks he’s so superior to her.
I couldn’t wait to show him he wasn’t. When I’d watched Syl on the screen, I thought the guy manhandling her body had made a mistake. That he’d assumed she liked it because she didn’t stop him.
I was wrong.
The smirk he wore and the way he reached back to grab whatever mask, without even looking at it, were proof of his apathy.
He didn’t give a shit about Syl or this process. He didn’t care about anything but himself, and I would see him pay for the way he disregarded her.
But not now. Not when Syl was so close, and I needed to lie low. So, I swallowed hard enough to hurt, and looked back down at my mask, trying not to hear the disgusting words spewed about her. Syl—who had only ever given them her beautiful body.
“Yeah man, I swear she likes it in the ass and with spikes. The way she squealed. Music. Fucking musical, I’m telling you guys. Too bad they won’t let us do that shit in here.”
Syl, Syl, Syl.
Close. I was so close to seeing her. If I broke this asshole’s nose, lost control and slammed his head into the wall until he stopped laughing, I wouldn’t get to see Syl. I might even be discovered. My fist clenched, turning white with tension and longing to be let loose right at this asshole’s face.
My control began to slip when the bastard laughed with his friends. Laughed like Syl was nothing but a thing meant for his enjoyment. With effort, I worked to rein myself in, the cramping pain in my tight fist barely noticeable as rage threatened to consume me.
But then I heard that fucker laugh and every muscle in my body locked as I fought for control. How fucking dare he.
Just when I thought I might lose it, the door banged open and a russet haired youth wearing a lab coat and holding a clipboard peered in.
“The induction has been administered to your breeding female, which means you have five minutes to um”—the poor kid’s face turned beet red—“prepare yourselves.”
A couple of the guys laughed at his discomfort because, of course, those assholes liked to see somebody suffering.
“It is now time to put on your masks, and I will hand out your personal lubrication packets. Your breeder should be lubricated enough when you enter, but if you find she isn’t, there are additional packets on the nightstand where the waters are set up. Your role here is simple—go into the room ready, engage with your breeder, touching her as little as possible, clean off with a tissue and help yourself to water before leaving.” The boy cleared his throat, flipping the page. “Any and all talking is forbidden, as is touching not required by the act. You are permitted to reposition your breeder if needed, but the goal is to go through as many of you as possible, so please be quick and courteous.”
I snorted, unable to help myself.
Quick and courteous.The idea was completely at odds with the very many things I wanted to do with Syl. The weight of eyes on me was suffocating, and I looked up to find the other first timer watching me carefully, his eyes darting between me and the exit like I was about to explode and he needed to know where to run.
Shit.How long had he been watching me? Hopefully not long enough to know how the chatter of our fellow breeders had sent me into a rage I was still recovering from. It was better now that everyone was putting on their rubber masks. The boy went around to ensure they were secure and no pieces of hair jutted out.
Better now I couldn’t see the asshole’s face, and everyone was too busy getting ready to brag about the different ways they’d had Syl. I put on my mask, surprised at how comfortable it was, and how lightly it sat on my face. I’d cleaned masks often enough, but never tried one on. Before Syl, the idea of even pretending to be a breeder for a moment hadn’t occurred to me.
The coordinator checked my mask, handed me a plastic packet with a tearaway piece, and stood in front of the room once more.
“You can now prepare yourselves. Once she’s pressed the buttons, I’ll return to take the first of you in to complete your duty.”
I looked across and found the other first timer wearing a black wolf’s mask. A little on the nose, but whatever.
I had no idea which mask the asshole had chosen, but I scanned the other men, trying to pick him out. My hand clenching and unclenching, eager for the fight I never got to have.
The sounds of tearing packets filled the room, and hands disappeared beneath towels. I barely needed any attention. Thinking about Syl all day had left me painfully hard, and I only needed to imagine her splayed out before me to feel ready to “perform my duty.”
Wanting to fit in, my hand slipped beneath the towel, and I lightly stroked my aching cock. But I didn’t open my lubrication pack like the others. No, I wanted all my lubrication to come from her. My head dropped back with a thud against the tiled wall as I pictured her getting ready for me.
This was happening. I was really here and just down the hall from me, my angel, my muse, would soon be waiting for me to satisfy her body’s needs.
Shuddering, I ran my hand up and down my straining length, imagining what she would feel like to touch. Then I thought of my replacement watcher. There was just the one camera angle, and I’d be masked, but it was strange to realize there would be someone on the other end of the camera watching while Syl and I came together at last.
This time, I wasn’t here to watch the party. I would be a participant.
Waiting for my false name to be called was an eternity. Eyes squeezed shut, I gave myself the occasional tug, vaguely aware of men disappearing around me as their turn came. When at last I heard my new name ring out, I opened my eyes to find I was one of the last in the room.
On shaky legs, I stood to follow the coordinator, my heart pounding. I’d been waiting for this moment for so long. Every pull-up, every bicep curl, every ripped muscle and torn ligament had been for this, for her. I followed him down the hall and the boy gestured to the door in front of me.
Gulping, I turned the handle and pushed my way in.
There she was. Perfection. Every inch of her body glistened with sweat. Her blonde hair plastered to her face in thick strands I longed to brush away. She was suffering, clinging to the bed rails so tightly the tendons in her wrists stood out.
“Shhh.” I couldn’t help it. I knew we weren’t allowed to talk, but the soothing sounds came from me without thought or intention. Pitched low and deep into my chest, creating a vibrating purr.
Syl’s erratic movements paused, and she looked up at me. Her eyes were wild like she wasn’t seeing me, and I remembered the stupid mask I wore.
Fuck. I wanted to tear it off, to show her my real face and take her, but that wasn’t why I was here.
I stepped up between her legs, that indistinct sound still coming from me, and she eased back down. Her hands loosening up on the railing, legs still splayed apart like she knew me, and trusted I could ease her suffering.
I would. Stepping between her legs, I positioned my tip at her entrance, smoothing my hands across her trembling thighs. Her pouty lip trembled and her body tensed. My purr intensified, and she whimpered, settling back down. The effect it had on her was remarkable. I’d never heard of anything like it, but the thought that I could calm her, soothe her, and satisfy her thrilled me deep down, and I pressed into her wet heat with a groan.
Syl was packed with other men’s cum and her own juices, and big as I was, I slid in the first few inches with ease. The sensation was unlike anything I’d ever known, and my head dropped back as I adjusted to the ecstasy of her grip on my cock.
A helpless mewling sound pulled me out of my daze, and I was shocked to find Syl trying to pull herself down, trying to impale herself on me more fully.
Fuck.Now I was the asshole, fucking this up and not giving her what she needed.
I slammed home, and she squealed beneath me. Her sound of pure pleasure took hold of something feral within me and drew it out.
I ripped away, slamming back in. She cried out, and I thrusted forward. Panting, I gripped her hips, pulling out and leaning forward, and used my height to gain extra leverage and pressed. Deeper. The word wasn’t right. Now that I was here, inside of her, I wanted to split her apart.
Syl’s hand reached out to rub at a glistening red bud on her pussy, and I understood it was a part of her body that made her feel good. Shoving her hand aside, I went to work on the red nub, keeping still inside her and watching her face as I circled it with my thumb, committing to memory what happened when I experimented with different movements.
When I understood better how it worked, I circled it eagerly, marveling at my power. Syl cried out, her hips trying to work me, and I knew what to do. With one hand, I pressed on her, leaning forward to drive deeper as I rubbed and pressed on her nub. She screamed, her eyes wide and back arching. Then I moved, rolling my hips as I moved into her. Deeper, rubbing her more frantically as the feral beast inside of me crested. I panted. The friction. Her sounds. All of it bringing me closer to release.
Then her hands joined mine, and I looked up to find her eyes wide and her mouth open.
“It’s you,” she whispered. The sound of her voice contained a gravelly edge that was pure animal.
The combination of her touching me, of her talking to me for the first time, was too much. I pounded into her, watching with satisfaction as her eyes rolled back and she arched backward onto the bed. Mercilessly, I pulled her hips closer to the edge, pinning her onto her back as I impaled her on my cock.
Syl screamed again, gripping the bed rails like they had any chance of saving her from the orgasm shaking through her body. Her pussy gripped me, and I was lost, spilling inside of her and giving her every last drop of myself. Everything I had.
But she wasn’t through. Her heat rose, and she cried. Real tears leaking from her beautiful blue eyes in an expression of desire and pain I knew I would draw later. She was never full, never finished until the heat was over, and I’d given her everything I could.
Only something in me rose to meet her desire.
I was becoming hard again. Just like when I’d watched her, my body responded to her needs—determined to satisfy her insatiable appetite in a way that shouldn’t be possible. With a shudder as she pulled me into her heat, I became hard again, my cock twitching to life inside of her. The friction bringing a new deeper aching pleasure I’d been missing when I’d fucked my hand in the watcher’s room.
I hadn’t expected this. Somehow, I’d expected this encounter to be like any other breeding party. The mask, a quick and courteous deposit, and I’d be done. But the thing between Syl and me rose up to declare itself, driving me frantically into her body once more.
Gasping, I pulled her back to me, but something prevented me from pulling out all the way, and my thrusts were shallow. Need consumed me. This wasn’t enough. I had to touch more of her, to press my body against hers, so the strange sound I was making and my newly hardened cock could calm her erratic energy.
I made use of every bit of friction I could manage, working her harder. Faster. Until I couldn’t stand the sensation anymore. I worked her nub. Press. Circle. Twist. Oh, she liked that. Her face was shining bright with pleasure. My release came more quickly this time, and I pulled back my hands, some sick part of me liking the handprints I’d left on her thighs when I’d spread her as far as she could go.
Syl calmed, her body limp beneath mine. She turned her head, and her hair fell across her eyes, shielding her face. Fuck, I wanted to brush it away, to cup her cheek and tell her I was here now. No matter what happened. But I couldn’t, and something about that moment made me remember where I was.
Someone was watching. With a renewed fear, I tried to work myself out of her. It was like I was stuck. With concentration, I was able to get whatever it was to ease enough that I could pull myself loose, marveling at the extra thickness at the base of my cock before coughing and going to grab a tissue. I wanted to bring her a tissue, to talk to her about what had just happened between us. Her head remained twisted to the side, her face covered, and with someone watching, I didn’t dare speak a word.
I left the way I’d come, wordlessly opening the door and closing it.
I left forever changed and more determined than ever.