Chapter Twenty #2
With a thud, he hit the ground next to her, lying with his shoulder against hers. Several minutes passed in silence, their chests rising and falling in tandem. The soft fall of waves upon the sand began to lull her eyes closed.
Christian’s knuckles grazed hers. “Why pirating?”
She stiffened, but he closed his hand over hers.
“I love the sea. I love the feel of a ship shifting below my feet.” She turned and met his gaze. “It’s part of who I am.”
He chuckled, the sound deep and sensual. “You could have sailed for your uncle.”
Her breath came out in a sharp huff. “No. No respectable man would sail under a woman. You should know better than most.”
“And what makes your crew different than law-abiding men? Why do they sail under you?”
They had no choice. Because her uncle had forced them. Her eyes pressed closed. Though it had felt good, though she had tasted freedom, none of it had been real. The hard truth was none of those men would have voluntarily signed up.
She forced a swallow. “Because pirates follow a different code.”
An ache formed in her chest. This was the first time she’d been able to be open with .
. . with anyone. The dull pain intensified.
Would she ever be able to speak this freely with anyone else?
The need to be understood, to have someone care about the things that mattered to her, became almost overwhelming.
After a steadying breath, she faced him again. “If I weren’t a pirate . . .”
“If you weren’t . . .” He trailed off and tightened his grip on her hand. “God, Red.”
The night sky stretched out, vast as the differences that would ultimately keep them apart.
A shooting star sliced across the inky backdrop.
Her mother had once told her to make a wish when she saw one.
Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes.
She wanted . . . she wanted this moment to last forever.
Just the two of them on the beach. Away from the realities of life. Away from differences.
A shadow fell across her and she blinked as Christian leaned over. He bent and pressed a single kiss to her forehead.
“We still need to have a talk.”
She flew upright, smashing her forehead against his jaw. The blow made him sit up and she rolled from under him and scrambled to her feet.
“Damn it, Red.” He glared up at her and she retreated to her pile of clothing. She yanked her breeches on. By the time she got her blouse over her head, Christian stalked toward her. His face was serious. Too serious.
The muscles in her legs twitched and she turned to flee.
He caught her arm. “You can’t keep running away whenever I say that.”
She tugged on her arm but he held tight, his frown reflecting pale moonlight. “What’s wrong, Red?”
“I don’t want to talk about that.”
“Well, we’re going to.” He dragged a hand through damp locks. “I’ve compromised you, Miss Warstein.”
She froze. It was the first time he’d used her name since he’d figured out her identity.
“I wanted to be compromised.”
She could barely say it. Such an ugly word. Compromise. It spoke of ruined lives and dashed dreams. All because society deemed women incapable of making decisions for themselves.
He loosened his grip. “It doesn’t work like that.”
“Of course it does. I’m a pirate, remember?” This time, when she yanked, he let go.
His eyes bore into her. “But you’re not just a pirate.”
Heat rippled through her. “What does it matter who I am?”
“It matters because you are Warstein’s niece. I assume he doesn’t know of your little side endeavor, but nonetheless, these things are not done.”
Her eyes narrowed. “And if I wasn’t his niece? If I were just a pirate? Then what? Would it matter then? Or would your conscience be able to live with it?”
He blinked under her verbal assault. “I didn’t know who you were the first time.”
She stilled, pulse pounding in her ears. He was right. He hadn’t. Let me save you. His words still echoed in her mind, haunted her dreams.
Turning to the water, she wrapped her arms around her chest. “Once we get back to Savannah, I understand this . . .” She waved one hand in a hectic circle. “Whatever this is, is over.”
He stood silent behind her.
“Your conscience is spared, Lieutenant.”
A wave crashed as it rolled up the beach. Palm fronds rustled in the breeze. The warble of a bird floated over them. And Christian’s heavy breathing drowned it all out.
“It doesn’t have to be over.”
The words went straight to the center of her heart. Twined into her flesh. Tugged at her soul. Then, understanding slammed into her.
She pivoted and speared him with an icy glare. “Yes. It does. Because I will never be anyone’s mistress.”
Before he could respond, she pushed past him and ran up the beach. When she came around the curve and the dancing flames of her crew’s bonfire became visible, she slowed lest the men see her agitation. She was the daughter of pirates, not a coward. No more running.
Not from Thorne.
Not from the lieutenant.
Griff saw her first and stood. “We were beginning to worry. Are you alright?” His gaze traveled up and down her.
She brushed some sand from her arms. Heavens knew what she looked like. “I’m fine.”
Liar.