28. Daphne #2
If I said that to Violet, she’d yell at me and make me take it back. And maybe she’s even right. But you can’t always help the way you feel.
My thoughts must not be loud enough for Rickie to hear because he lifts my damp hair and tucks it away over my shoulder. He’s casual about it, as if we always do this. Then he leans in and kisses my neck, smooth as you please.
Tingles shoot across my body. And then they redouble as he slips a finger under the shoulder strap of my bathing suit and runs the length of it, down to my breast. “Did you wear this for me?” he whispers, as his breath tickles the shell of my ear.
“No,” I say. But what I mean is, yes, but I shouldn’t have . I just spent several days wishing he’d pay more attention. And now that I have his attention, I’ve forgotten what to do with it.
But Rickie hasn’t. “I like it anyway. And I like you .” The compliment just rolls off his tongue. And I turn my chin to look into his warm gray eyes. They crinkle at the corners when he smiles back at me. “You look hot in this. But I still want to take it off you.”
Instead of replying, I just stare at him in wonder. He makes it sound so easy. I want this. I like it. I like you . I wonder if that will always be hard for me, or if the fear will seep out of me some day, so that I can look at a man and say, I want you, too .
“You’re mad at me,” he whispers.
“No,” I say quickly. “I’m really not.”
“Yeah, you are. A little bit. Because I’ve been stuck inside my own head. I’ve been neglecting you.”
“You’ve been distant,” I say carefully. “But that’s me on a good day.”
He laughs, and I feel it rumble inside my chest. “You’re not distant. You’re cautious. And you have reasons. He hasn’t contacted you again, has he?” After asking the question, Rickie wraps an arm around me and scoops me onto his lap. Suddenly we’re nose to nose. “Has he?”
“N-no,” I say.
“Good. Do you have anything else to tell me?”
“No? Why?” His gaze at point-blank range is so distracting.
“Because I’m going to kiss you in a minute, and you’ll forget whatever you had to say.”
“That’s arrogant.”
“No it isn’t.” His smile teases me. “Because I’ll forget too. I’ve got it bad for you. And I’m sorry to send you mixed signals this week. We’re more alike than you think.”
“We are?” I ask as his hand cups my face. I lean into the pressure of his palm. I can’t help myself.
“Yeah,” he whispers. “Messy lives and greedy hearts. That’s us, Shipley.”
“Oh.” It’s hard to argue with that. Especially when Rickie starts dropping soft kisses at the corner of my mouth. I’m impatient, though. I know what’s coming, and I know I won’t actually resist. So I turn my face and find his mouth with my own.
With a chuckle, he brushes his lips across mine, still teasing me as my body lights up in anticipation of more. “You kill me, Shipley.” His long fingers brush down my body until he grips my hips in two firm hands.
My head jerks upward, because I’m in a perilous position right now—on his lap, at the edge of the pool. It would be so easy for him to toss me right in the water. With both hands, I reach for his biceps and hold on.
“Hey—there’s a zero percent chance I’m about to throw you into the water.”
“But you could,” I say quickly. And I still don’t relax my grip. I’ve been tricked before.
“When are you going to learn? Pushing you away is not in my plans,” he says. And then he tightens his grip on my hips and pulls me in close, until we’re nose to nose. “Pushing you down on that blanket? Now there’s a plan I can get behind.”
Whoosh goes the breath out of my lungs. And I get goose bumps as he tugs us both away from the edge of the water, then falls back onto the blanket.
I follow him on all fours, looking down at him, halfway shocked by this turn of events, and also at my own audacity, because I’m practically straddling him now. “Rickie?”
“Yes, baby girl?” He reaches up and runs his hand right over my ass, and I feel my body respond immediately. I’m hungry for his kisses. But now he’s waiting to hear my question.
“Um,” I hear myself say. “Chastity told me you never hook up.”
His eyes widen a fraction. “Well I guess she’d be surprised if she came back for her pocketbook right now, wouldn’t she?” With playfully slow fingers, he eases the strap of my bikini top down my shoulder, until it threatens to fall off.
“But is it true?” I ask. I’m teetering on this emotional precipice, trying to decide if I can do this—if I can put myself out there one more time, even though my love life is a perpetual disaster.
I want this. I really do. And he knows it.
“It’s true,” he says, running his fingertips down my jaw, then teasing my lip with his thumb. “I haven’t hooked up with anyone since before my injury.”
I stop breathing. “Really? That long ago?”
“Really,” he says, almost absently. His talented fingers trace the top edge of my bikini top, over the swells of my breasts, teasing my sensitive skin.
“I used to think something was wrong with me. But now I think I know better.” Those gray eyes look up, boring into mine.
“I was missing you. I was waiting all this time for you to come back into my life. And now you’re here. ”
A shiver runs up my spine. But it’s the good kind. “You are very persuasive,” I whisper.
“It’s easy to be when you’re telling the truth.
Now come closer and let me show you.” He beckons to me with a crooked finger.
“That’s a girl. A little further. And feel free to crawl toward me at any time.
Yesss .” His hands reach for me, skimming my bare ribcage, pulling me in.
I land on him, and it isn’t very graceful.
But no matter. He rolls, pulling me to the blanket, his generous mouth finding mine. His kiss is a searing press of lips and heat. He licks into my mouth a moment later, and I open for him, as obedient as a baby bird.
“ Yesss ,” he murmurs again, rolling us until he’s on top, braced on strong forearms above me. “That’s more like it.” He kisses me again, while I give in and explore his sculpted chest with my fingertips.
He was right about one thing—it’s easy to lose your train of thought while kissing Rickie. My hesitation evaporates faster than the water that’s still clinging to our steamy skin. He leans in, chasing kiss after kiss, his strong body a needy weight against mine.
I’ve never done this before. I’ve never kissed a man on a blanket under the trees. And I’ve certainly never let one tug the straps of my bathing suit off my shoulders, and then expose my breasts one by one to the dusky sky.
“Take the top off,” he murmurs, leaning down to tongue my nipple. “I need it out of my way.”
My hands do his bidding, even if getting naked outside feels brazen. As the cool air peaks my nipples, it occurs to me that I’m not a good girl anymore. I tried to be, but I failed spectacularly.
And the casual slide of Rickie’s roughened thumbs across my bare breasts has me too distracted to care how far I’ve fallen.
I just want more of this reckless feeling.
I thread my fingers through his hair and pull his head down to my chest. A moment later, his wicked tongue runs amok over my nipples.
This is exactly what I need. My hands find their way to the waistband of his bathing suit. I slip my fingers past the fabric and wrap my palm around his hard length.
The kiss he’s delivering to the valley between my breasts halts its path. And he makes a low groan of surprise and delight as I stroke him. “I love that,” he says huskily.
“Of course you do.” I swipe a thumb across his tip, and he makes a masculine grunt of pleasure.
“Baby, you can touch me all day long.” He rolls lazily out of my grasp. “But that’s not what I meant. I love it when you let go. When you finally say fuck it and take what you want. Now that’s sexy.”
Then he lifts his hips and turns away, shedding his bathing suit, tossing it aside. When he turns back to me, he’s wearing nothing but a fearless smile. Confidence is my drug of choice, apparently.
We lean in at the same time, and my smile rejoins his. He moans into our kiss, and the sound is so raw and hungry that I feel it between my legs. Then his hand is there, pulling off the last scrap of my bathing suit. My body quivers happily.
And then I’m naked on a blanket with Rickie, ready to give him anything and everything he wants from me.