Chapter 21 #2
My mouth opened and shut. I wasn’t sure how to respond. Cooper didn’t care about me in more than a general, platonic way, did he?
TC tilted his head. “Are you sure everything between you is fake?”
One-sided would be a better description. “Yes,” I said. “I mean, he asked another girl to the dance. He wouldn’t have done that if he’d been interested in me.”
TC relaxed a little. “Good.” He shot me a smile. “Nash never was all that bright.”
I laughed politely and wondered if TC meant it or was just using empty flattery. That was the problem with Cooper telling me things about TC. Now I was second-guessing his motives.
The hostess showed us to a corner table near the fireplace. A waiter was already there, setting a bread basket on the table. He told us about the specials as he filled our water glasses.
We spent a couple of minutes deliberating on the menu. To get a conversation going, I asked TC what colleges he wanted to apply to.
“My mom thinks I should get an MBA. My dad thinks it’s ridiculous to go into that much debt to learn how to run a business and says I should become an auto mechanic like him.
” TC picked up a roll and ripped it in half.
“He thinks the two of us could open our own repair shop. You’re lucky you only have one parent around to please. ”
Lucky was one word for it. I thought about all of the empty spaces my mother had left when she’d gone. After every play I’d performed in, I watched the other cast members’ mothers give them hugs and tell them what a great job they did. My mother had never been to one of my high school plays.
Tonight as I’d gotten dressed, I’d texted back and forth with Selena. Her mother was fussing over her, helping her get ready. My mother didn’t even know I was going to the dance. I’d pretty much stopped calling her to give her updates on my life.
She thought high school wasn’t all that important. It was just a dress rehearsal for college, and college wasn’t real life either—just a preamble to it.
Besides, there was only so much a person should have to hear about changes in krill populations, and I’d long since reached my limit.
“What career option are you leaning towards?” I asked.
“I’ll probably go the auto mechanic route. No chance that AI will be fixing cars anytime soon. What about you? Are you going to try your luck in Hollywood?”
People asked me that a lot. The closer I got to graduation, the more realistic I got about my chances of breaking into the business.
“Probably not. Not everything you love ends up being good for you. Some things would only break your heart.” Like pursuing Cooper.
He was one big heartbreak waiting to happen.
I fiddled with the edge of my menu. “Fortunately I don’t have to choose a major tonight.
There are other things I could love as well as .
. . um, drama. I can give different options a try and see how things turn out.
I shouldn’t just wait around in case the first option changes its mind .
. .” Somewhere in that, I’d stopped talking about acting and started talking about guys.
Sheesh. Even when I wasn’t talking about Cooper, I still was.
“See if the first option changes its mind?” TC repeated in confusion.
“I mean, see if the first option is possible. It’s hard to make a living in Hollywood.
There’s too much competition.” I wondered what Cooper and Dahlia were doing right now.
“Too much talented, beautiful, self-confident competition. And even though people say gentlemen prefer blondes, they really don’t. ”
“I think I might,” TC said.
“You’re sweet.”
He wagged his eyebrows. “I suddenly want to become a Hollywood producer so I can hire you for some films.”
That would’ve been a really touching sentiment if TC hadn’t gone on to tell me all of the questionable roles he would like to cast me in. Hearing that I would make a great Jabba the Hutt slave girl sort of ruined the gesture.
The waiter came, took our orders, and the two of us made small talk through dinner. I did my best to keep the conversation going. The whole time, I felt like I was in a play, onstage improvising lines because I wasn’t quite sure of my part.
I ought to be giving TC a chance. He was here and actually interested in me. Maybe there was more to him than just brawn and swagger. After all, I’d thought Cooper wasn’t my type and had changed my mind.
After we finished eating and were waiting for the server to return with my credit card, TC said, “You never told me what you thought of the football game.”
“I thought you played really well, except for that time you tackled Cooper after he’d already thrown the ball.” Our team received an automatic first down for that.
TC smiled, slow and wide. “I figured you were worth the penalty.”
I wasn’t sure what to say to that. Thanks seemed wrong. “I bet the rest of your team didn’t think I was worth it.”
TC shrugged and leaned back in his chair. “The coach lectured me about it, but by that time, I figured the game was a lost cause anyway. Besides, Cooper is too cocky. He deserved to go down.”
I felt a flash of anger on Cooper’s behalf.
He wasn’t cocky about football. He worked hard at it, just like I worked hard at drama.
For the first time, the thought of the fumbling football reel I’d made of Cooper last year sent guilt flooding over me.
I shouldn’t have done it. I was going to have to send him the new one I’d put together of his successes, even though the season was far from finished. It was an apology I needed to give him.
I pretended that I had to find the tickets for the dance on my phone and sent Cooper the link to the file.
I knew he wouldn’t see it until I returned his phone, but I was afraid if I waited, I would chicken out .
. . or be so ticked off at the way he was fawning over Dahlia at the dance that I wouldn’t send it at all.
The server returned, and we got up to leave. TC held my hand as we walked to his car.
Should we be on hand-holding terms? I couldn’t decide.
My feelings for Cooper were muddling everything.
Was I mentally objecting to holding TC’s hand because I stupidly had a crush on a guy who had zero interest in me or was this actually premature?
And was I only allowing this because I wanted Cooper to see that another guy thought I was worth some attention?
Hand-holding had never caused such deep soul-searching before.
We got into TC’s car and headed toward my high school. After a few minutes, he said, “Do you have any plans for next weekend? We could catch a movie.”
If I said yes, we’d officially be dating. Was that fair to TC when I had a crush on another guy? “I don’t know. I haven’t talked to Cooper about next weekend yet.”
TC frowned. “Do you need permission from him to go out with me? You said everything with him was fake.”
“It is, but I still have to check with him. It would be super awkward if he went to the movies with his family and ran into us.”
TC shrugged. “We could go somewhere he wouldn’t be.”
“I still should check with him. He might have a fake date planned so he can go out with Dahlia, and he needs to pick me up from my house to make it seem believable. I’ll get back to you.
” Meaning, I would decide tonight whether I wanted to see TC again, or whether I was going to stupidly sit around hoping Cooper would change his mind about me.
The second option admittedly was pathetic.
TC raised an eyebrow in question.
I forced a smile. “I’ll let you know soon.”
“Okay.” There was some tightness to his voice.
We were nearly to the road that led to the high school.
To get to the main building and its parking lot, you had to drive past the swimming facilities, tennis courts, golf practice area, the track complex, and the baseball and soccer fields.
It always took a few minutes to reach the parking lot, even when ignoring the lowered speed limit on the road.
Cooper’s phone dinged in my purse.
“I’d better silence my notifications.” I took his phone out and hoped TC didn’t notice that this phone was different from the one I had the homecoming tickets on.
The notification was from Dahlia. She’d sent him a message on Snapchat that started with Pics of tonight, along with some attachments. Probably from their photo shoot.
Had Cooper draped his arm around her shoulder like he had with me? Had he kissed her on the cheek?
I silenced the phone and shoved it back into my purse.
If Cooper’s mother could see his phone from hers, she wouldn’t be able to open the pictures without Cooper knowing, although she might wonder why Dahlia was sending him stuff. Dahlia knew not to text anything incriminating to him, didn’t she?
TC said, “Earth to Madeline . . .”
My head jerked up. “Sorry.” I’d been so deep in thought that I hadn’t heard what he said.
He took his eyes from the road to give me a disappointed look. “That’s harsh. You’re paying attention to your phone instead of me?”
Another apology hung on my lips. Before I said the words, a small animal darted across the road. A cat. “Watch out!” I yelped.
His gaze snapped back to the road, but not quickly enough. A thud sounded against the car.
Had we run over it or just hit it? I twisted in my seat. I couldn’t see anything in the darkness. “Stop the car,” I told him. “We hit the cat.”
He swore and pulled over to the side of the road. I jumped out, turned on my phone’s flashlight, and ran back, searching for the animal.
I hoped the cat wasn’t Mascot, and then I felt bad for hoping it was some other cat, someone’s beloved pet.
My gaze landed on a small fury mound lying near the edge of the road. White fur with orange patches. Mascot.
“Don’t be dead. Don’t be dead. Don’t be dead,” I repeated.
As though answering me, the cat lifted his head and let out a low, plaintive meow. He was still alive but wasn’t moving. He just lay there, dazed and staring.