Chapter 3
THREE
‘I can’t believe we’re all here together.’
After they’d made the most of the October afternoon sun, Ellen and Robert had unpacked and taken showers while Lucy prepared dinner.
With just the three of them around the table, the setting was uneven.
Robert and Ellen this side and Lucy on the other.
She stretched across the table with her wine glass to chink both of theirs.
Robert sipped at the dark-purple Rioja. ‘Well, the wine is definitely a lot better than the mouthwash we drank in those days.’
Lucy reached forward to clink his glass again. ‘That is very true. And we are definitely better dressed. Did you actually own any other clothes than that checked shirt and grey jumper?’
Ellen followed Lucy’s appraising eye to her husband who’d changed into linen trousers and an open-necked white shirt. Even those couple of hours in the pool had brought a sun-kissed glow to his face. Hers felt tight and dry.
Lucy leaned back in her chair with a gleam in her eye. ‘It feels like a lifetime ago that we were all there. Well, it was a lifetime – your daughter’s lifetime. Wasn’t she born about three months after we left?’
Was she making a little dig? ‘Five months. Nearly six.’
To this day, Ellen could remember the cold fear that had coursed through her when she’d seen that thin blue line on the pregnancy test. Her periods had never been particularly regular so it was only when she’d started to feel really sick that she’d considered the possibility.
Even then, she hadn’t really believed that it was pregnancy causing her early morning trips to the shared bathroom.
‘Quite a good way to take the best-looking guy in our year off the market before the graduation ball. Well played.’
Lucy raised her glass and laughed at her own joke and Robert joined in.
Ellen tried to show she’d taken it well, but it was hard not to feel the sting.
Robert had been absolutely incredible back then.
After the shock of her news, he’d taken her into his arms and told her that they were always going to end up together anyway.
‘This is just a little earlier than planned.’ For the last twenty-seven years she’d hoped that he’d really meant that.
That they would have been married whether there’d been a baby or not.
‘Gosh, we were young back then.’ Lucy toyed with the glass in her hand, swirling the Rioja around so that it lapped the side of the glass, leaving a red stain. ‘Do you remember the parties we used to have after the bar closed on campus? You would make those ridiculous cocktails.’
The last comment was directed at Robert. Ellen was surprised. What cocktails?
But Robert was grimacing. ‘Goodness, yes. We’d buy anything cheap from the supermarket and mix those concoctions. I’m surprised we didn’t make ourselves ill. Sometimes they had lumps in where the creamy ones had curdled.’
Lucy laughed. ‘They were crazy, crazy nights. Have the two of you been recapturing those days now that your girls are out the door?’
No. They hadn’t. Any hope Ellen had had all these years that they would make up for the missed opportunities in their twenties once their children were older had not materialised. These days, Robert seemed more interested in work than in her. ‘Not yet. But Abigail’s only just left.’
She took a large gulp of Rioja, the wine jammy and thick on the back of her tongue. Lucy raised a manicured eyebrow. ‘Really? I assumed that you two would be love’s young dream again.’
This was starting to get a little too close for comfort.
Lucy seemed happy to slip back into the intimacy of their college days, but Ellen wasn’t ready to open up about her marriage, her worries, her life.
Especially with Robert sitting there. ‘Well, maybe this lovely place will inspire us. Have you had the house long?’
Lucy sat back in her seat and looked around her.
It really was a beautiful room. White marble beneath their feet, a glass table top and black leather chairs were bathed in light from the floor-to-ceiling windows, sharing the last of the early evening sun.
‘We’ve been here a couple of years. Joe will get itchy feet soon and move us somewhere else.
It’s always best for me to not get too attached. ’
She sounded wistful, but Ellen saw the pleasure in her eyes at the concept of going somewhere new. Maybe this was the way to avoid getting bored of your life; not staying in the same place for too long.
Robert cleared his throat. ‘He must be pretty successful at it? Joe? To afford somewhere like this as a second home? Along with your place in Hertfordshire?’
How did Robert know where their other home was? Ellen didn’t remember Lucy mentioning it? It must’ve been when they were in the pool earlier.
Lucy shrugged. ‘Yes, he does really well. But he works hard for it. He’s away a lot. Sometimes at the last minute. You must know how that is with all your trade shows.’
How had they got this much information about each other after only fifteen minutes alone in the pool? ‘How often are you in Hertfordshire?’
‘Usually I’m there most of the time. But now Emily has left for university, there’s no need for me to be there so I’ll probably spend most of my time here. That should curtail Joe’s activities.’
Though she was clearly joking, there was an edge to her laugh. Ellen had assumed her husband would be here already. ‘Will Joe be home soon?’
‘He’s away tonight. Work. He was planning on being here when you arrived and then he was needed to sort out some issues with the builders he’s using in a new complex a few hours up the coast. Downside of the job, unfortunately.
Hopefully, he’ll be here in the morning.
How’s your job in the lab? I still can’t believe you’re an actual scientist.’
Ellen wasn’t sure that she’d call it that. ‘It’s a lot of repetitive testing, to be honest. But the hours have worked well around the kids.’
‘You must be the only one of us actually using your degree. Don’t suppose you need much chemistry for medical sales, Robert?’
Ellen almost winced. Though it was well paid, Robert didn’t enjoy what he did. Travelling the country, selling pharmaceuticals to NHS trusts. A ping from Ellen’s phone interrupted her train of thought. It was Abigail.
Hope you’re having a nice time, Mum. I’m going out tonight with Emily Meads. She’s found a bar in town and we’re going as a group. Love you! xxx
She waved her phone at Lucy. ‘Our daughters are going out together tonight, apparently.’
Lucy’s laugh was deep and husky. ‘I apologise in advance.’
Her words prickled in Ellen’s ears. ‘What do you mean?’
‘I’m joking. But Emily is a little wild. I hope Abigail is able to say no.’
She couldn’t have made Ellen more concerned if she’d tried.
If Emily was wild, then Abigail was tame.
One of Ellen’s biggest concerns about her going to university was her ability to make friends.
She was so quiet and introverted. Plus, all she heard from her own friends with daughters at university were the horror stories about drinks getting spiked and young women being vulnerable.
She couldn’t bear it if something happened to Abigail.
‘It’s so scary, isn’t it? Them being away on their own.
No one to check if they get back safely each night? ’
Until Robert reached over and placed his hand over hers, she hadn’t realised that she was gripping a white linen napkin with her fingers. ‘She’ll be fine, Ellen.’
It was easy for him to say that. Boys had a very different experience of nights out than girls did.
He’d been amazed when Grace and Abigail first started to go out alone and she’d passed on all the tips she had at her disposal: keep your keys in your hand in case someone grabs you and you need to fight back; cross the road to see if the man walking too close behind you follows; never ever leave a friend behind.
Lucy frowned and her smile turned up on one side in gentle mockery. ‘Surely you’ve been through all of this with your elder daughter?’
Ellen shook her head. ‘Grace didn’t go to university. She did a degree-level apprenticeship with a bank in the City.’
At the time, she’d been disappointed that Grace wouldn’t get the whole experience of going away to university.
But there’d been relief, too. While Grace was working – and studying – she’d lived at home, where she’d been until a year ago when she moved into a house share with two other girls from work.
Nodding slowly, Lucy reached over for Ellen’s plate, clattering it onto her own before reaching for Robert’s. ‘Very sensible. No debt. My elder daughter was studying for years. It seemed never ending. And now we’re starting all over again.’
That was the first time she’d mentioned any other children. ‘You have another daughter?’
‘Yes. Charlotte.’
Lucy picked up the bottle on the table to refill Ellen’s glass. When she held it up to Robert, he shook his head, so she poured the remains of the wine into her own glass. Was Ellen imagining the look that just passed between Robert and Lucy at the mention of her eldest daughter?
Lucy pushed her chair back and rose, holding the plates. ‘How about we take dessert out onto the patio? It’s still warm enough, I think. Shall we have coffee too? Decaf for you, Robert?’
This was one too far. Ellen fought to keep her voice curious rather than accusatory. ‘How do you know that Robert takes his coffee decaffeinated?’
Was that the slightest blush on Lucy’s cheek? ‘You must’ve told me. Or Robert did? Or a good guess, maybe. Go on outside, I won’t be a minute.’
It was too petty a thing to make a scene about, but all of these side remarks were beginning to add up. As soon as they were out of earshot, seated around a small metal table near the pool, she asked Robert, ‘How did Lucy know you drink decaffeinated coffee?’
He shrugged. ‘I don’t know. We were talking about healthy eating earlier while I was in the pool. Maybe I mentioned it?’
It was possible, but unlikely. And she wasn’t about to start a discussion on the way he and Lucy had been acting today when she could reappear at any moment.
She shivered. Now the sun had lost its strength, there was a chill in the air.
‘I’m going to get a cardigan from our room. Do you want anything?’
Robert was gazing past the pool at the sea in the distance. Without turning to look at her, he shook his head. ‘I’m fine, thanks.’
The patio door was still open, so Ellen didn’t make a sound as she entered and walked towards her bedroom. From the open kitchen door, she heard a loud ringtone – a Killers song maybe? – and heard Lucy pick up.
The corridor past the kitchen was long enough that she heard her answer and ask how things were going with whoever it was on the other end of the line.
It wasn’t as if Ellen was eavesdropping, but when she was almost at her bedroom door, she heard the words that confirmed that she was right to be suspicious.
Lucy’s voice was low, but perfectly clear.
‘Yes…He’s here…No, she doesn’t know anything.’
And then she closed the kitchen door.