Chapter 26
TWENTY-SIX
In the quiet waiting room, Ellen marvelled at the fact that Robert could get an appointment with his consultant the very next day after they’d flown home.
The power of private healthcare. It had been a very different story for her own father fifteen years ago when he’d had to wait months between appointments for the respiratory problems that had eventually claimed him.
Around the pale-green walls, an assortment of mismatched armchairs gave the feel of an elderly person’s living room.
Aside from the receptionist, they were the only ones in the room.
On the facing wall, above an ancient radiator, hung a large gilt-edged canvas of an old oak tree stretching out three branches from its thick strong trunk.
Although it had been good to get home yesterday, she’d barely slept a wink, thinking about this appointment today. She could only imagine how Robert must feel. She squeezed his hand. ‘Are you okay? What’s going through your mind?’
He returned the squeeze. ‘Just thinking about the car insurance.’
She hadn’t been expecting that. ‘Why on earth are you thinking about that?’
He looked surprised at the question. ‘I’m making a list. Of all the little things that you might not know need doing. The cars are on a multi-car policy. You need to call them in March. I need to put it on the list.’
Even though she shook her head at him in exasperation, her heart ached for all the little things that he did for their family that she never even considered. And also because he was thinking about a time when he wouldn’t be able to do them. ‘Please stop doing that.’
He shrugged. ‘It helps me. To keep my mind busy.’
She could understand that, even if it was impossible for her to think about anything else right now.
When she’d woken this morning, there’d been about five blissful seconds of being back in their own bed before she remembered where they were going today.
Rolling onto her side, she’d watched the rise and fall of Robert’s chest as if it were the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen.
To the left of the old oak tree, a door clicked open and swept across the deep pile beige carpet. A man strode towards them with his right hand ready to shake theirs. ‘Robert. How are you doing? Charlotte tells me you had a bit of a fright?’
They were like this, men like Robert. Talking about the most terrifying moments as if they were trivial.
Robert shook his hand. ‘You could say that. This is my wife, Ellen. Ellen, this is Mr Grayson.’
She’d forgotten that consultants were always ‘Mister’ rather than ‘Doctor’. ‘Hello. Pleased to meet you.’
Mr Grayson – the man holding their entire future in his hands – looked to be in his mid-fifties.
Square-shouldered and ramrod straight, he wore an expensive suit with style.
Though not conventionally handsome, his kind eyes and obvious charisma gave him a charm that made him attractive.
His handshake was firm, confident. ‘I’m very pleased to meet you, too. Come through.’
The room they entered was exactly as she’d pictured a Harley Street doctor’s office to look.
A heavy mahogany desk, bookshelves with medical journals, a surgical bed in one corner with a curtain rail around it.
He held out his hands for them to take the two seats on this side of the desk before sliding into his own.
‘I know that Charlotte has already talked you through the test results. Would you like me to go through them again?’
After glancing briefly at Ellen, Robert shook his head. ‘No, I think we both understand everything. I guess my only question is how soon you would recommend me having the surgery.’
Steepling his fingers, Mr Grayson leaned towards them, his face serious but gentle. ‘If you are planning on going ahead with the surgery, my recommendation is that we get it done as soon as possible. We don’t want to run the risk of another episode before we have a chance to resolve the problem.’
His use of euphemisms didn’t make this any easier to hear. Robert’s ‘episode’ in Lucy’s living room had been terrifying to watch. Ellen swallowed the acid in her throat. ‘How soon would that be?’
He picked up a pair or reading glasses and clicked the mouse in front of a computer screen. ‘I’ve actually got a theatre booked for Monday which is no longer needed. We could slot you in there?’
It was surreal. He made it sound as if this was as easy as booking a show, although Ellen wouldn’t let the reason for the theatre no longer being needed play on her mind.
Robert rubbed at his temples. ‘That’s pretty soon. Do you have anything later?’
She looked at him in exasperation. They weren’t reserving a train ticket. ‘The doctor has said you need to get this done as soon as possible, Robert.’
‘I know. I know. It’s just…’
Mr Grayson removed his glasses and tapped at his lips with one of their arms. ‘I do understand. It’s moving very fast. Your condition is an unpredictable one, Robert, and I would like to perform the surgery before there has been any further deterioration.
But if you need some time to think about this, we can leave it for another week?
I could book you in to come back to discuss it then? ’
Robert turned to look at Ellen. Whatever he saw in her face must have decided him, because he turned back to Mr Grayson with a determined nod. ‘No. Let’s go with Monday.’
‘Good. I’m going to ask my PA to email you the consent form to read through and then you’ll sign it when you arrive for the surgery. If you have any other questions that arise over the weekend, please use the number I gave you.’
Ellen sent a silent prayer of thanks for the medical insurance supplied by Robert’s company. He may have grown to hate that job, but this perk was definitely worth having. ‘Charlotte mentioned that the condition was hereditary? We have two daughters.’
‘Ah, yes.’ The reading glasses were back on and he clicked away at the computer. ‘They are twenty-six and eighteen?’
Ellen nodded. ‘Yes. Our youngest has just started university.’
‘At their age, there’s not a huge rush to get them tested, but if you want, we could do it on the same day? On Monday?’
Monday? That was too soon. ‘Not Monday. I think that would be a lot to cope with on the same day that Robert’s in surgery.’
A clock on the wall behind them ticked loudly into the silence. Robert looked surprised. ‘You said you wanted all of this dealt with as quickly as possible?’
How could she explain this in a way that wouldn’t make him suspicious? ‘I just need to focus on getting you better. Then we can get the tests done. It’s too much all at once.’
Mr Grayson smiled kindly. ‘Well, you can talk to your daughters about it and see how they feel. They are both adults so it will be their decision whether to get the test at all.’
Ellen hadn’t even considered that. In her head, they were both still her babies. Though it made her anxious to think about it, Mr Grayson was right. Decisions like this were no longer hers to make.
Back outside in the late October sunshine, the hum of the traffic and chatter of pedestrians was jarring after the hushed tone of Mr Grayson’s office.
Everyone in the world was continuing their lives while, for them, the button had been paused on everything.
Robert took a deep breath. ‘So, that’s it, then. Monday.’
Three days. Seventy-two hours to get themselves prepared for Robert’s surgery. Had she done the wrong thing in pushing him to do it straight away? ‘You’re okay with that? You didn’t want to put it off another week? I just thought?—’
He held up a hand to stop her. ‘You were right. I need to get it done. Then I’ll be all fixed up and we won’t have to worry any longer.’
From your lips to the ears of God . Wasn’t that what her mum used to say? Ellen sent her own silent prayers with it. ‘Good. And I’ll book time off work so that I can wait on you hand and foot until you’re fighting fit.’
His smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. ‘Sounds good to me.’
She knew how hard he was trying to be strong for her. ‘Shall we go home? We have to call the girls. They need to come. I can collect Abigail in the morning.’
Finally, he gave in. Halfway. ‘I know we need to tell them, but I don’t want to drag Abigail back here so soon.
Let’s speak to Grace tomorrow and then we can go and see Abbie on Sunday.
If she wants to come, we can bring her home with us on Sunday afternoon and then you can drop her back to Canterbury on Monday or Tuesday. ’
The seamless transition from ‘we’ to ‘you’ wasn’t lost on Ellen. Concerns about the operation prickled in her stomach. She wasn’t going to argue with him now. Telling Grace first was a good idea. ‘I’m going to call her now. She might be making weekend plans.’
Grace was still not answering calls from Ellen’s mobile, so she left a voicemail. She tried to keep her voice free from anything that might worry her. ‘Hi, Grace. It’s Mum. Can you call me? I know you’re still cross but something important has cropped up and we need you to come over.’
They were just about to leave when they heard their names called from behind and saw Charlotte hurrying towards them.
In a suit and black court shoes, her hair in a sleek ponytail, she looked every inch the professional.
‘Sorry, I was hoping to catch you on the way out. I’ve just seen the schedule. You’re having the operation on Monday?’
‘Yes. Mr Grayson thinks sooner rather than later.’
‘Well, he would know. He’s really good, Robert. The best. You’re in very capable hands.’
That was good to hear. Ellen reached out and squeezed Charlotte’s arm. ‘Thank you for everything you’ve done. Much as I’ve complained about the old school network over the years, I am selfishly grateful that you were able to get Robert seen by Mr Grayson.’
Charlotte smiled. ‘Me, too. It was really fortunate that you saw me with Mum that day. It must’ve been fate.’
Maybe it was fate that they’d met Lucy all of those years ago. ‘And fortunate that your mum went to the same posh school as Mr Grayson.’
She’d meant it as a joke, to lighten the sombre mood, but Charlotte frowned. ‘It was Robert who went to school with Mr Grayson, wasn’t it?’
She looked at Robert for confirmation and he nodded. ‘Yes. Not at the same time as I was there, though.’
Charlotte smiled at Ellen. ‘Mum didn’t go to a school like that. She went to a regular state school.’
Surely she must have that wrong? It was Ellen’s turn to frown. ‘Are you sure about that? When were at university, she definitely said she went to a private school?’
Charlotte laughed. ‘Definitely sure. She used it as a way to chastise me whenever I didn’t work hard enough at school. Reminded me how fortunate I was. You must be confusing her with someone else.’
Ellen definitely wasn’t confusing her with someone else, but she didn’t want to say anything critical about Lucy. It was strange, though. Why would she lie?
Before she could ask anything else, her phone rang in her hand. It was Grace, calling her back. She took a deep breath and answered.