Chapter 21
I asked Kai to study again after school, but he has soccer practice.
When I go to the administration office to collect my phone, I work on an excuse to go to the soccer field and watch.
It’s never a biggy the dozens of times I’ve watched football practice, but I’m not sure if soccer practice draws in a big crowd.
If I can’t blend in, I might seem like a crazy stalker.
My mind pictures the way Kai lights up every time he talks about soccer. He’s passionate about so many of his beliefs, but soccer is at the top. It makes me want to see him in action.
When I leave the office and wander into the foyer, Freddy is a few steps behind and waves to get my attention. “Want a ride home?”
It’s on the tip of my tongue. If I asked him to join me, I bet Freddy would say yes. No one would even question why Freddy is at Kai’s practice. He’s Mr. Popularity, for goodness’ sake. Heck, they’d probably ask him to join them for drills.
But I don’t exactly want this afternoon turning into The Freddy Jones Show.
Plus, I wouldn’t know how to answer any of my brother’s potential questions about my crush.
Freddy’s such a people pleaser, he’d probably try to fix up me and Kai.
His overzealousness could ruin our blossoming whatever-this-is relationship.
I nod. “Yep. Let’s go home.”
As I take a step further into the foyer, I bash into someone. With a grunt, I stumble on my feet. “Watch out, would you!” it snarls out of me before I even look up at her face.
Paralyzed by my words, Jamie West can only blink at me as her mouth hangs open.
“Hey, Jamie,” I say with a wave. She’s in her gym uniform. “Oh, do you have soccer practice?”
Her jaw shifts, like she’s about to speak, but nothing comes out.
“I hear you’re great at soccer,” I continue, turning red at the thought of how forced this is coming across.
The heavy steps of a pacing jog vibrate against the flooring. “James, are you coming?”
My stomach clenches as Kai joins us in the hall. Surprise lowers his energy as he realizes I’m standing in front of Jamie.
Panic-stricken, Jamie pats Kai’s arm as her rounded eyes wait for my attack. “Yeah, let’s go.”
Taken off guard, Kai asks her, “What’s going on?”
Jamie shakes her head. “I dunno. She’s being weird. I need to get out of here.”
Kai takes a protective step in front of Jamie, his jaw hardening when he asks me, “Did you say something to her?”
“No, I just…” My sentence fades into nothing as betrayal pales his light tan.
Kai’s fists clench. “Because if you said something…”
“Dude,” Freddy cuts in. “Chill. I was standing right here. Tabby was just trying to be nice.”
Kai turns to Jamie, and the horror on her face doesn’t waver.
“It’s her brother,” she utters. “Of course, he’ll defend her.”
“Hey, what’s going on here?” Cammy calls out as she and Yvie meet us in the foyer.
Oh crap. If these two start saying nasty stuff to Jamie, Kai will never believe I’ve taken the target off Jamie’s back.
I pinch into Freddy’s blazer, hard enough to sting his skin. When he looks down at me with an upturned lip, I make sure there’s pleading in my eyes. If there’s such a thing as sibling telepathy, I hope he hears my internal plea. Please, please, please don’t offer them a ride home.
I sense the mocking firing up in Cammy as she locks onto Jamie. “Wow, do you live in that ratty gym uniform? Like, any excuse not to be in a feminine uniform, right?”
I hear the inhale as Kai’s chest inflates, ready to defend his friend. But I can’t let him. If I’m going to prove I’m serious—that I want him in my life—I have to jump on this grenade.
“Oh my gosh, girls,” I say loudly so I get all the heat from their stares. “You should have seen me yesterday. I ran up a hill, and it was so embarrassing.”
Cammy’s eyebrow arches and there’s a curl at the edge of her mouth. “What’s this?”
“Yeah, I just ran,” I babble, “from Main Street to my house. I just ran. Like an idiot.”
Yvie winces. “Why did you do that?”
“I dunno, but it wasn’t pretty. I don’t know what I was trying to prove.”
“You’ve been talking a lot about getting fit,” Cammy says, sizing me up. “You don’t have an eating disorder or something, do you?”
“Whoa!” Both Kai and Freddy step in when Cammy crosses a line too far.
I step in close to Freddy and signal Kai with a nod. What are you two still doing here? This is the diversion where you get Jamie out of here.
Cammy casually throws her hands in the air as if it were a harmless question. “What? She’s one of my best friends. I’m worried about her. She’s acting differently.”
Freddy points a finger at her. “Take it back and never say it again.”
I nod at Jamie and mouth, “Go.”
Jamie’s eyes narrow with confused skepticism.
When I make a show of stamping my foot and widening my eyes at Kai, he finally gets moving, rescuing his friend from any more potential attacks.
Cammy pops a hip and twirls a piece of hair around her finger. “Of course, Freddy. I never want to hurt anyone. I just thought we should all be aware of the warning signs.”
Freddy rolls his eyes and places a hand on my back. “You wanna go, Tabby? You girls can make your own way home?”
“But, I…” Cammy stops herself, and I see her mind working overtime to get Freddy back on her side.
“I’m meeting Zane in the parking lot,” Yvie chirps. “You wanna third wheel, Cammy?”
Insulted, Cammy groans and marches out of the school building.
Like a naughty puppy trying to gain its owner’s affections, Yvie chases after her with rambling apologies and compliments.
“He said nothing,” Freddy murmurs.
I step to the side as more students pass us to leave the school building. “What?”
“Kai.” Freddy points to the exit. “Drew said he saw you two coming home last night. You just told the girls about running home, and he didn’t say anything. He didn’t stand up for you.”
“I didn’t want him to.”
Freddy’s head juts back, and he folds his arms. “What do you mean?”
“You won’t get it. I was proving a point.”
He stops me from walking away. “What point?”
“You saw the interaction I had with his friend. She’s terrified of what I’ll say to her. I promised Kai I wouldn’t be mean to her.”
“And telling your friend an embarrassing story proved that point?”
“Yes, because it distracted them from tearing down Jamie.”
Freddy ushers me out of school. “I don’t like it. You deserve better than a guy who wants you to take a bullet for his friend. He should take the bullet for you.”
“You saw the ice last night. I would’ve actually sprained my ankle if Kai hadn’t saved me. He’s a good guy, Freddy.”
“Not by Dad’s account.”
“Dad doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Besides, didn’t you see him step in when Cammy mentioned an eating disorder?”
Freddy grunts with distaste. “Ugh. That girl is beyond a brat. She can think twice about ever getting inside my car again after saying that.”
I pat his arm. “Thanks for having my back.”
He winks. “Always.”
Once we get home, Freddy and I go our separate ways. I sit at my desk in my bedroom, cradling my phone in my hands and staring at Kai’s last text message.
"What?"
We were texting right after he couldn’t acknowledge my presence in the hallway because he was with his friend. Now, things are so awkward because his other friend hates my guts.
I can’t exactly text him now, trying to make it right. One, he’s at soccer practice. Two, he left with Jamie. Kai won’t respond to my text while he’s with her. At this stage, I doubt he’d even want to read it.
Just when I’m about to set my phone down, a text pings. My heart sinks when it’s Cammy.
"Please tell Freddy I’m sorry. I never meant to say anything that would hurt him."
I drop the phone and stand from my chair. Is she serious right now? I’m the one she accused of having an eating disorder. I’m the one she hurt. And she wants to make sure things are good with my brother?
She’s sick!
Why have I spent so much time trying to please her? Everyone else at school can move on from her attacks. Why am I so convinced it’s better by her side than running away from her? Am I addicted to the constant need to support her?
I fling myself onto my bed, ready to sleep away the mess of conflicting emotions imploding in my brain.
By the time it’s actually bedtime, I still haven’t texted Kai, and I’m terrified of going back to our awkward non-talking phase.
But he hasn’t texted me either, and shouldn’t I take that as a bad sign?
***
When I wake up the next morning, I want to cheer, “Thank God it’s Friday!” But let’s be real. I want Friday to be over because I don’t know what I’m walking into today at school. Maybe it’ll be a competition for who hates me the most?
Thankfully, Camila is distracted by other students harshing her vibe, and I save some defensive energy for chemistry. Walking into today’s lesson, I assume nothing less than monstrous levels of uncomfortable awkwardness. However, my tension is relieved when Kai gives me that mischievous smirk.
“Umm,” I begin. “How was soccer practice yesterday?”
“Good.”
Okay, one word is a start. I wouldn’t call it a good start, but it’s not hostile silence.
I clear my throat and hate the grating sound. “Did it run long?”
“No.” He shifts in his seat. “Maybe a little longer. Ty and I were competing to see how many push-ups we could do.”
“Oh.”
“Then I hung out at Jamie’s café till it closed. They were pretty packed for a Thursday, so I got home late.”
“Ah, I see.” Crystal clear. He’s picked her.
“So,” he drags out the vowel. “That was very brave, what you did.”
I flinch. “Huh?”
“You deflected Camila onto yourself when she was about to let loose on Jamie.”
“It was nothing.”
“No, it was something. You know that.”
“I didn’t want her to get hurt.” I swallow hard and stare into his eyes. “I didn’t want you to get hurt.”
“But you don’t have to throw yourself to the wolves to save her.”
“I wanted to show you I was serious,” I admit. “It hurt when you believed Jamie that I was being mean to her.”