Chapter 12 #7
Leo’s first thought was that René had grown old. His hair, already thinning the last time they’d met, had receded further and showed traces of grey, and his face looked weary, drained. What a sad, sad man.
Dragging up a smirk from the bottom of his stomach, Leo tipped up his chin and kept his tone perfectly pleasant. “Hello there, René. Or would you prefer Karl?”
A short second passed, then René’s eyes widened. His gaze flicked from Leo to Nate, then back. He hurried to shut the door.
Leo stopped the attempt with his shoulder, pushing into the flat past René, and felt Nate right behind him. “Now, now,” Leo chided. He kept his voice light and sweet, fit for afternoon tea with the in-laws. “I know it’s been a while, but surely that’s no way to treat a guest?”
“What do you want?” René asked, thin and reedy. Maybe it was the time gap or maybe it was that Leo had grown into a different person—either way, he didn’t remember René ever sounding this… weak. Leo glanced at the man’s hands and fought the sick lurch of his stomach.
“What do I want?” he repeated slowly, pursing his lips in demonstrative thoughtfulness.
Next to him, Nate crossed his arms in a way that brought out the bulging muscles of his biceps.
“Hmm. That’s a good question, actually. A very good question.
How about we sit down for a little chat while we discuss the answer? ”
René swallowed. Leo felt his smirk twist into something that tasted like triumph.
* * *
Need you home right now
That had been the extent of Leo’s message.
Joshua had received it just as he’d paid for his purchases—crisps and salt sticks, beer, tequila, ice cream, frozen pizza.
Everything that was needed for watching tonight’s semi-final, Brazil facing Germany.
If Germany made it through, Tristan would prematurely take the betting crown and be unbearably smug about it.
When Joshua read Leo’s text, he nearly dropped his purchases and ran. It could mean anything, and knowing that Leo had led the charge on his two ex-clients today… Well, shit.
Joshua grabbed the bags in a hurry, hopped into the car he’d parked outside the shop and pushed the speed limit in a way he usually wouldn’t.
Leaving everything in the car, he barged up the stairs to find Leo sitting cross-legged on his doorstep.
As soon as their eyes met, Joshua breathed a sigh of relief at the wide, near-manic grin on Leo’s face.
Leo jumped to his feet, fisted one hand in the front of Joshua’s shirt and dragged him into a bruising kiss, already reaching for the zip of Joshua’s jeans.
“Hi,” Joshua got out, and Leo swallowed the word, exchanged it for a wild laugh.
Turning them around, he crowded Joshua back against the surface of the door, trapping him against the wood with his hips.
Fuck, they were still in the stairway, and it was sort of private with Joshua’s flat the only one on the top floor, but not a good idea. Probably.
Oh God, also, wait. Wait. Joshua needed to—Leo had just—he’d just come from confronting his past, and was he all right, was he really and truly all right? Was he?
With some difficulty, Joshua worked up enough of a will to turn his face away and breathe, hands gripping Leo’s shoulders to still him. “Leo,” he uttered. “Hey, are you okay? Is everything okay? Are you all right?”
It took a second, then Leo relaxed a little, tight-strung energy uncoiling under Joshua’s touch.
“I’m all right, babe.” His voice was bright and airy, his earlier grin resonating in it.
“I am so very all right. Like, no one’s been this all right in the history of forever.
I’m brilliant, and you’re brilliant, and everything is brilliant.
Also, I love you a stupid amount, and I want you now. Get us in there.”
Jesus Christ, okay. Joshua fumbled the key out of his pocket as one of Leo’s hands slipped under his shirt, fingertips pressing into his stomach. “Need to make you a copy,” Joshua mumbled, not really thinking. “So you can let yourself in next time, wait for me inside, like, naked in my bed.”
Leo froze for an instant, then pushed himself even closer. “Outside,” he hissed. “Want you to ride me on your balcony.” Standing on his tiptoes, he rolled his hips against Joshua’s, and holy shit, Joshua needed a moment to recover. The backs of his lids were drenched in velvety black.
“Okay,” he said. “Okay, yes.” Blindly, he shoved the key into the lock and twisted, almost tripped when the door gave behind him.
Together, they stumbled into the flat, still intertwined.
Leo kicked the door shut behind them, walking Joshua towards the balcony, hands frantic as they tugged at the buttons of Joshua’s shirt.
“Are you really good?” Joshua remembered to ask. He forced his lids open to study Leo’s face. “This isn’t just, like, a displacement activity?”
Leo pulled back enough for a radiant grin. “A displacement activity? The fuck you talking about, love?”
“You know, when an animal is cornered, and then it kind of…” Joshua faltered at Leo’s raised eyebrows, at the plain amusement in his eyes. After a pause, Joshua finished with an uncertain, “Because you went to see—you know?”
“A displacement activity,” Leo repeated.
His laugh was true. “No, Princey, I’m not a cornered animal, thanks.
But…” While his laugh petered out, his eyes remained bright even as he continued.
“About René and Jake. Yeah. Just, holy fuck, you should have seen their faces. I’d built them up to these larger-than-life shadows in my head, and they were just so weak.
Pitiful, really. Such sad, sad humans. Fuck, they don’t even—they’re weak, babe.
They can’t hold me. They have no fucking power over me. ”
Free, Joshua thought—and yes, Leo did look free, like a weight had slipped off his shoulders. They can’t hold me.
“Love you,” he told Leo, and there was a short, pulsing moment while they simply grinned at each other.
With a violent tug, Leo got Joshua’s shirt open and dug his knuckles into the tattoo on Joshua’s hip. He leaned in, mouth against the shell of Joshua’s ear, words escaping in a warm rush. “Love you. Only ever want you to touch me, yeah? Be the only one who gets to touch you like this.”
“Yes,” Joshua managed. “Yes.”
Leo continued without missing a beat, his voice low and firm. “Because you’re nothing like them, we’re nothing like them, and this is—fuck, everything. You’re everything.”
In response, Joshua tangled both hands in Leo’s hair and roped him back in for another deep kiss. He went easily when Leo nudged him further back towards the balcony.
“Did you mean it?” Leo asked later. They were sprawled naked on Joshua’s outdoor bed, the afghan thrown haphazardly over their cooling bodies to protect them from the breeze, skin tacky with sweat and lube and come.
“Probably,” Joshua replied. “Which part in particular?”
“The thing with the key.”
Oh.
Leo’s voice had been hard to read, fairly neutral and too quiet to give away much. Lifting his head from Leo’s shoulder, Joshua stared at his face, tinged in gold by the low-hanging evening sun. Leo met his gaze and held it.
“I know it’s, like, weird,” Joshua began carefully. “I mean, we haven’t been together very long, and it’s kind of soon, but…”
“But we’ve already gone through more than most other couples do in years,” Leo finished for him. “Affected each other’s lives more, too.” His eyes were warm.
Joshua exhaled around the radiant glow in his veins. “Yeah. That.”
“Eloquent, little prince.” Leo combined it with a squeeze of Joshua’s hip, thumb fitting into the dip next to the bony jut.
He smiled, and while it started out bright, it quickly faded into something slower and more thoughtful.
“I’d love a key,” he said quietly. “I’d also love for you to be right here with me when I call my parents. ”
Joshua shifted further into Leo’s side, throwing a leg over his thighs. “You want to do it now?”
In lieu of an answer, Leo twisted his torso to grapple for his jeans that lay discarded on the floor, tugging them closer to retrieve his phone. “Slay all the dragons in one day,” he told Joshua. The faint apprehension laced into the statement made Joshua snake an arm around his waist and hold on.
“You know it could wait another day.”
“I know. But I’d rather do it now, get it over with.” Leo breathed out a half-formed sigh, and for all that his fingers tightened on Joshua’s hip, his body was still fairly relaxed.
“What if they’re sorry?” Joshua asked, breaking the silence that had enveloped them for a few moments. “What if they apologise, say they’d like you back in their life? Do you think you could…?”
He didn’t complete the thought, but he didn’t have to; Leo’s eyes were pensive when they met Joshua’s.
“I don’t know,” Leo said softly. “For one, that’s a big if, and unless the last ten years have changed them…
I don’t know.” Then he scoffed, the corners of his mouth turning down.
“They’d probably love to take me back once they learn I’m with you.
Get them a direct in to the Crown. No thanks. ”
Anything Joshua could think of were harsh words about people who didn’t deserve to be parents. He choked them back down and settled for kissing the corner of Leo’s mouth, then rested his head back on his shoulder.
Chest rising with a deep intake of air, Leo brought the phone up to scroll through his emails.
He selected one from Nate that contained some contact information.
After another deep breath Leo dialled the number, and they both tensed as soon as it started to ring.
Leo had the phone tilted at an angle that allowed Joshua to listen to each ring, count them out—one, two, three, four.
“Austin Residence,” a female voice said, smoothly professional.