Chapter 39 Jericho
JERICHO
“Are you going to come over here and kiss me or stare at my parents all day?” The raspy voice asks me and I freeze, not believing my ears. It's a sick, horrible, awful, twisted prank my mind is playing on me.
That’s his voice. I would recognize it in every life I live. He’s talking. He’s talking to me.
I rotate my body, risking my sanity to look at the bed in the middle of the room.
Brown eyes meet mine and I crumble, shattering into pieces as I hit my knees on the unforgiving floor of the hospital.
Even in my wildest dreams, I’m not sure if I really let myself believe that he would look at me again. With those brown eyes I love so much, they have bags underneath them, the slight purple hue sinking into his skin and making them look like a bruise.
He’s still beautiful, though. Just as gorgeous as he was when I saw him for the first time at thirteen years old. The boy who held my hand on our first day of highschool. The man who held me and unknowingly helped me fight my demons.
The sobs rack my chest, shaking my body as I feel the cathartic release of the stress I’ve been holding.
He’s awake. Raiden is awake and he’s talking and he’s…
“So is that a good cry like you’re crying in happiness or an oh no he’s alive and my plans have been thwarted cry?”
I choke out a laugh. Or probably a sob. Whatever it is, I’m unsure but I slowly push myself off the floor, resisting the urge to ball up there and continue living on in this dream. Because if I wake up, I’ll be devastated.
Approaching the bed slowly, Raiden extends his hand out to me.
The IV is nestled in the same vein it’s been in, his hand is pale and the other veins are a deep blue against his skin.
I hesitantly reach my hand towards his, waiting for the sick joke of all of this to be my imagination to shock my system.
But it never happens. His fingers brush mine and I can’t fight against the bolt of electricity that flows between us.
“Raiden,” I croak, grasping his hand gently in mine, to not hurt him or disrupt the cords attached to him.
He smiles, it's an exhausted one, but his eyes are light with life and I can’t find it in me to say anything else as he tugs on me as hard as he can, which isn’t much compared to what he used to be capable of, but we’ll work on growing his muscles stronger.
Now that he’s awake, we have our whole lives to live.
“Jericho,” he says and his eyes slowly slide closed. I panic, my chest heaving with deep breaths as I watch the paper thin skin of his eyelids shift over his irises, hiding them from my sight again.
“No, tiny dancer, you have to stay awake. You can’t leave me.” Not again, I plead, I just got him back.
“I’m not dying, I’m just exhausted,” he remarks, his eyes barely opening to look at me.
Oh, wow, okay. At least I know that the months he spent in a coma didn’t change his attitude any. He’s still the snarky, sassy man I love.
“Okay, I’m sorry, I’ll go,” I tell him, my heart falling out of my chest at the thought of leaving him but if that’s what he needs to get his rest, I’ll do it.
“No, you’re not leaving me.” He scoots over in his bed, his face wincing in pain as he shuffles over.
Raiden looks at me expectantly, and then the open spot he just vacated.
I shake my head, refusing to squeeze my large frame onto the small bed beside him.
He just woke up and I don’t want to risk hurting him or delaying his progress.
He stares at me, his gaze holding mine and I feel myself cave when he looks at me like that. How can I tell him no?
Ema and Rodney both stand up, squeezing me before they go out the door, letting it shut quietly behind them.
It's just us two in this room, nothing except his heartbeat keeping us company in the silence. His breaths are steady, his chest rising and falling like it did on the machine, but this time it’s all his own.
There’s no tears left for me to cry, my eyelids burn with the exertion.
“Hi,” he whispers when I manage to tuck myself halfway on the bed, my ass is hanging off and my arm is awkwardly tucked under my body, but I can feel his body heat this close so I can’t complain.
“Hi,” I say, tucking a lock of hair behind his ear. His face flushes that pretty pink color I love and he scrunches his nose as he tries to fight off his grin.
“I missed you,” I tell him after a heartbeat of silence.
It’s true, I’ve never known the act of truly missing someone until he wasn’t here.
When I was deployed, I knew I could leave him messages and when he was ready he could talk to me.
That wasn’t the case for the past few months, he hadn’t been able to talk to me.
To tell me if his arm was itchy or his mouth was dry.
I couldn’t do anything to help him as he laid in this hospital bed.
“I missed you. But I know you were here everyday. Thank you… for that.”
I want to ask him how could I not be? Where else did I have to be besides here next to him? I couldn’t risk it.
“Could you hear me?” I don’t know if I want to know the truth.
Would it be worse if I spent everyday talking to him and keeping him updated on what was going on without him and he didn’t know…
Or if I spent everyday talking to him and it didn’t make a difference?
If none of my words made a difference and the only reason he woke up was pure luck?
He nods, and a smile breaks out on his face. He could hear me. Every moment that I spent rehashing every moment of my day, everything I encountered, stories from other people, they paid off. He could hear me, even if he couldn’t respond he knew I was here and that I would never leave him alone.
Raiden stares into my eyes, his brown irises burning into my own, his gaze filled with longing and love and so many things I’ve been desperate for while he’s been gone.
I card my fingers through his hair, rubbing the soft strands and familiarizing myself with their texture, letting them embed themselves onto my skin, carefully avoiding the back of his head where the short strands of his hair are finally growing around the scar.
His lips are puffy and pink, probably where he’s been chewing on them since he’s been awake, and now that my gaze is trained on them I can’t divert my attention.
Raiden mouths a word, some sort of prayer or plea or siren call.
I lean closer, until I can feel his warm breath against my lips, until the oxygen he’s breathing becomes my own.
His breath smells like toothpaste and mouthwash, and if the circumstances were different I would tease him about preparing himself for me.
But we’re past teasing, and the longer I stare at his lips the more desperation builds inside of me until I’m nothing except a ball of need. Need for him. Need for his lips. Need for his touch. Need everything he has to offer.
He’s my storm, the one who came in and wrecked my world, cleaning everything else away to leave it anew.
And when the storm clouds disappeared, he was standing there waiting for me.
Calling me home. Wherever Raiden is, I am too.
Home isn’t a place anymore. It’s not a house to build a future with, but a person.
With one heart, a set of lungs, and a touch that sets me on fire. Raiden is my home.
Raiden’s hands go to the back of my head, carefully moving his arm so he doesn’t pull the IV out of it, and he cups the nape of my neck, gently tugging on the short hairs and pulling me closer to him.
Our lips ghost, an angel kiss in this small hospital room where I’ve felt so much heartbreak.
I push my mouth against his harder, taking in his taste and his lips and holy fuck. This is what I’ve been craving, more than anything.
The love of my life kissing me back.
His lips are soft, surprisingly. But there’s life underneath these lips. A heartbeat and a soul keeping him here on Earth with me. A bond that even death can’t come between.
Cold fingers against my skin, warm lips against my own. I don’t know what I did to deserve him, but I’ll never let him go.
I kiss him until I’m out of breath, drawing back to gulp in air while keeping a millimeter of space between us. I crack my eyes open, but his are still shut, the picture of serenity with a small smile gracing his perfect face.
“I love you, tiny dancer.” The same words I’ve uttered to him before.
The same words that have burned themself inside my brain and taken hold until it’s the one thing constantly on my mind.
I love him, with everything inside of me.
I love him with every atom of my being. I belong to him–mind, body, and soul. I wouldn't have it any other way.
Raiden gasps, his eyes shooting open in alarm as he stares at me.
His eyes are so wide I can see a majority of the white around the irises.
I refuse to take the words back, even if he’s not ready to hear them or say them back, he needs to know how I feel.
The feelings that I’ve been harboring since we were teenagers.
“You what?”
“I. Love. You.” I enunciate every syllable so he won’t get it confused, so he won’t find a way to convince himself that he’s dreaming. “I love you, and I’ve missed you so fucking much. I couldn’t go another day without letting you know.”
Raiden pulls me to him again, kissing me senseless, his tongue in my mouth as he explores and I let him, I give him everything I can.
A throat clears and I try to pull back, but Raiden isn’t having it, he groans low in his throat and my dick flexes in my pants from the sound.
Another throat clears and Raiden pulls back this time, an annoyed sigh leaving his lips as he glares at the intruders. It’s the Doctor who’s been taking care of him and a nurse I’ve seen quite a few times around the floor.
“Sorry to interrupt, but we have to take your vitals.” The Doctor’s face is pink, probably from how me and Raiden were just going at it, but I can’t find it in me to be embarrassed.
“Of course, I’ll move out of the way.” I attempt to do as I said, but Raiden’s grip on me doesn’t loosen and I flit my gaze between him and the Doctor, waiting to see who wins the battle of demands.
It ends up being Raiden after a silent showdown where he refused to let me up, and I didn’t want to cause him any more distress.
The nurse did her routine as she normally does, reading the screens and writing down the numbers on her clipboard. She nods, just once, and turns to the Doctor. “Everything looks good.”
“Thank you, Kait.”
The Doctor waits patiently until the door shuts behind Kait before he comes to sit beside the bed. He crosses his legs and stares up at Raiden, cocking his head slightly to the right as his gaze locks on us.
“You’ve made a vast improvement, I’m happy to see that. How are you feeling? Any discomfort, sharp pain?”
“I’m hungry, but other than that I think I’m fine.”
“We’ll get you some food, but it has to be soft or liquid.
Your throat is going to be irritated and your digestive system isn’t used to solid food yet so we’ll have to work our way back up to it.
” The Doctor smiles, a small one that would be barely recognizable if I hadn’t spent the past months searching his face for any sign of news on Raiden.
He’s typically stoic, never letting a hint of emotion pass across his face, but as he watches me and Raiden before he leaves the room, the smile on his face soothes any worries I had about Raiden making a full recovery.
“We’re going to get some of this stuff pulled out of you… I’m sure you want to go to the bathroom on your own.”
The door shuts quietly behind the Doctor as he leaves after removing the tubes from Raiden, and Raiden shifts around in the bed, bumping into me. “You okay?” I ask him, attempting to scoot myself a little further over the edge so he can have some more room.
“Fine.” His tone is weird, and when I look down at him, his face is flushed and his eyes are pinched tight.
“Baby, what’s wrong? What do you need?” In my panic, I try to sit up and accidentally pull the blanket off him. I try to fix it, covering his legs and torso back up, when I notice something underneath the hospital gown.
I swallow, my throat clicking with the sudden dryness of it.
He’s hard. His cock is tenting the thin fabric of his nightgown.
My own body tightens in response, my dick hardening and a drop of precum slips out of my slit, wetting the front of my underwear. It’s like all of a sudden my body realizes how long it’s gone without a release, and now it’s primed and ready to get the show on the road.
“Raiden–” I start, and then stop, not sure where my thoughts are taking me.
All I want right now is to feel his cock inside of me.
Thrusting down my throat as he spills his warm cum into me, leaving a piece of him inside to carry with me.
A life essence that I’m going to die without if I don’t get the chance to taste him.
“It’s fine Jericho… It’s just been a while. And I think there’s a lot of relief from the catheter being out, too.” His attempt at a joke falls flat, but his dick throbs. I lift my eyes from his cock to his eyes, and he’s staring at me with an intensity that I’ve missed.
“Can I taste you?” The question is whispered, barely audible through the pounding in my ears.
If he tells me no, I’ll understand and respect his wishes.
I’ll just have to go into the bathroom and relieve my own ache with my hand.
It won’t be the first, or the last time I've resorted to doing that when Raiden has been involved. I’ve been pining after him for years, what’s a few more weeks?
Or months. However long it takes him to feel comfortable again.
“Can you help me shower first? I smell like a hospital and I doubt I taste any better.”
I chuckle, not wanting to tell him that I knew he would be thinking that when he woke up, and that’s why I always made sure to bathe him once a day.
I maneuver myself out of the bed, and help him stand as well.
He’s wobbly on his feet, and I have the quick realization that maybe we shouldn’t do this.
He just woke up. I’m sure the nurses have a policy about this sort of thing.
. But as I see Raiden’s smile as I hold onto him to help guide him to the bathroom I rationalize with myself that I don’t care.
I’ll take care of him and protect him from anything that causes him harm.
If he wants to shower, I’ll be there helping him every step of the way.