Chapter 6
6
Josie
It’s Friday evening, and I feel almost normal. My voice is a little raspy. Sam had soup delivered for me Wednesday and Thursday as he said he had work. We texted back and forth a lot. Seeing those three little dots over and over made my heart do flips.
Sam called earlier. He said he was glad to finally hear my voice, even if I sounded like a long term smoker. I laughed, coughed, laughed some more, then coughed more. He offered to bring me more soup, but I declined. I haven’t had much appetite. Guilt is eating away at my stomach.
I miss him. I want to be with him. I want to be more than friends. Watching the Cats isn’t the same without him. Nothing feels like it’s the same without him. It’s been less than a week. Why do I have such strong feelings for this man that I can’t have? He’s what I want in a partner, who also loves the Cats. It’s like a dream come true.
Except. Laura.
My sister. Not by blood but by choice. She will always come first. I owe everything to her. I wouldn’t be in this house. I wouldn’t be going to college. I wouldn’t have a bright future away from poverty and abuse without her.
Even though she’s barely talking to me, I’m about to text her to apologize and make things right between us, when I hear the front door close. Laura strides into the living room giggling. She’s not alone. Behind her is a tall guy who looks similar to Sam. They are holding hands as she leads him inside.
“Oh. You’re awake.” Her tone is curt.
“Yeah. I was about to head to my room.” I stand up to make my way towards the hallway. The guy with Laura clears his throat.
“Sorry. Sebastian, this is my roommate Josie. Josie, this is Sebastian, Sam’s brother.” I nod at him but keep my distance. I’m in enough trouble with Laura and do not want to make it worse with her new flavor-of-the-week.
“Nice to meet you. I took a sleeping pill, so I better get to bed. You two have a good night.”
“Oh we will.” Laura retorts.
“Nice to meet you, Josie.” Sebastian barely acknowledges me. His focus is squarely on Laura. She notices and beams.
Does this mean Laura is over Sam? Maybe she’ll start talking to me again now that I have my voice back. I miss my best friend. Will she be upset now if I date Sam since she has apparently moved on to his brother? Laura and Sam never dated. She shouldn’t get upset if I date him since he was never hers.
I shouldn’t feel guilty that I like Sam. A lot. I’m not about to risk permanent damage to my friendship with Laura over a guy. Normally, I would never go for my best friend’s ex-conquest. We don’t even like the same types of guys. Sam is my type though, not hers.
They never dated or slept together. He never returned her interest. He gave her a ride home once, the night he met me, and came inside because she said there was something she wanted to give him. Probably her body.
Sam was never Laura’s guy. Her interests have moved on.
My heart skips a beat and the guilt clenching my stomach loosens. There’s shouldn’t be anything stopping me from dating Sam. I miss the companionship of being in a serious relationship. I wonder if Sam is interested in something serious or just a fling like most college athletes on the verge of heading to the big game?
Sam feels different though. He got me soup. He texts multiple times a day. He asks about my feelings. He takes an interest in things I like, many of which he also likes. All the signs point to him liking me as much as I like him. Maybe I should ask Laura first before taking the next step with Sam.
I hear giggling coming from the living room as I close my bedroom door. I hope this guy is good to Laura. Settling down with someone for a change might be good for her.
Sam takes me to his favorite Italian restaurant. We laugh and talk. It feels like a date-date. I want it to be a real date. Bonus if there is a goodnight kiss too. Can it be a real date now? I’m torn. I haven’t smoothed things over with Laura yet, but I noticed Sebastian leaving the house this morning.
I never want this date to end. Sam takes us to get ice cream but since there are no available tables, he drives us to what looks like an old baseball field surrounded by a high chainlink fence and parks. It’s too cold to eat outside, so we eat our sundaes with the SUV’s heater running. Sam pulls out a blanket from the backseat and hands it to me.
He remembered I’m always cold? This. Man. I don’t think I’m strong enough to stay away from him much longer.
“My father owns this field. He bought it so I would have a place to practice anytime he wanted me to. No one else uses it.”
“Anytime he wanted you to?”
“Yeah. Baseball is his dream, not mine. He wanted to be the baseball star, but he got injured in college. It ended his chance to play professionally. He was pissed when I chose to forgo the draft last year to finish my degree. But he says I have to enter it this year.”
“But that’s not what you want?”
“No. I like playing, but I’m not interested in the lifestyle that comes with doing it professionally –the traveling, the hectic schedules, the constant training, the attention.” He grimaces.
“Have you told your dad that? Can you not enter the draft since you don’t want to?”
“It’s not that simple. He threatened to cut me off. Wouldn’t be a problem for me as I can support myself. I’ve been saving and investing for years, but he’d cut off my brothers too. They don’t get access to their trust funds until they graduate. It could destroy Seb’s rockstar dreams. Getting started in the industry is expensive. And Shawn. He just started college. His first love is hockey. Our father tolerates him playing hockey because I’m playing baseball. It would devastate Shawn to lose that.”
“That’s not fair of your dad to put that on you.”
“No, but I’ll do it for them. Coach says I’m likely to get drafted with my stats and skills. I’ll just have to play for a couple of years to satisfy my father until my brothers are out of college. Then I’ll become a financial advisor and support my brothers to make sure they don’t blow their entire trust funds.”
“You’re a good man Sam.” My heart swells. He’s postponing his dreams to satisfy his selfish dad because of his devotion to his brothers. And here I am wanting nothing more than to kiss the guy Laura, who is a sister to me in every way but blood, wants. But she’s sleeping with Sebastian now. It’s not betrayal when she’s moved on?
“Josie, I would really like to kiss you right now.” My breath hitches. I turn my head and meet his hungry gaze. He licks his lips. Those same pale pink, plush lips I’ve dreamed about kissing since he first walked into my house. Those same lips I’ve dreamed kissing every inch of my body.
I nod and lean across the console to press my lips to his. It’s slow and sweet and perfect. His lips are warm and taste like chocolate ice cream. I could kiss him for hours and never be full. He snakes his hand around the back of my neck and tilts my head. My lips part to allow him entry. Our tongues twine in a delirious dance.
Sam groans and begins kissing me with an ferocity that has my core lighting on fire. This man knows how to kiss, and I moan into his mouth. He grunts, breaks the kiss, pushes his seat back, grabs me around the waist, and lifts me over the center console to straddle his lap. Our lips lock back together as his hands grab my hips to grind my center against the hard rod in his pants.
I grasp the bottom of his shirt and lift it over his head, barely breaking contact from the kiss as he helps me remove it. His chest is a chiseled masterpiece reflective of the hours he spends honing his baseball skills. It’s hot. It’s hot in this vehicle. I grab my sweatshirt and rip it over my head.
Sam peppers kisses down my neck and across my collar bone. He reaches behind me and unhooks my bra. He throws it somewhere before latching his mouth onto to my nipple. He licks and sucks one before moving to the other. I’m panting. He teases my nipple between his teeth, biting gently making me moan loudly.
“Josie. Tell me you feel this connection like I do. Tell me you want me as much as I want you because sweetheart, I don’t want to wait any longer to make you mine.” His words settle over my soul. I want nothing more. Now that Laura is dating his brother, there isn’t anything stopping us.
“Yes. Make me yours, Sam.”
It’s a frenzy as we maneuver over the seats into the back while also trying to rip the rest of each other’s clothes off. Somehow, I end up on my back laying across the back seat, Sam hovering over me without a spec of clothing between us. He nudges between my legs and I wrap them around his back. Our eyes lock as his hard length presses against my opening.
“Shit. Condom.”
“It’s okay Sam. I have an IUD and am clean. I got tested when I found out my ex was cheating on me, and I haven’t been with anyone since.”
“I’m clean too. We had physicals for the start of the season last week.” He starts to press inside me, then pauses.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. Please Sam. I want you.”
He enters me slowly, stretching me in the best way possible while softly kissing me. I exhale at the sensation of him filling me. He inches inside until he bottoms out and swears. He pauses to allow my body to adjust to his size.
“Fuck Josie. You feel amazing. You’re so wet and tight and hot.”
“Me hot? That’s a new one.” I can’t help but chuckle.
“Shit, Josie. I’m not going to last if you do that again. You just rippled around my cock.” I start to reply, but he stops me with a hard kiss.
He pulls almost all the way out, reaches under my hips, lifts me, and slams back in. His arm wraps under my waist as he thrusts in and out, faster and faster. Sam’s kissing me senseless while hitting this spot inside I thought was a myth. It feels incredible, and I’m quickly barreling toward the best orgasm of my life.
I scream his name as an orgasm slams into me. Stars flitter across my vision. Sam’s thrusts turn erratic as my walls tighten around him. He mumbles my name as he comes. Somehow in the tight space, he flips us. I’m laying on his chest as we catch our breaths. Sweat coats our skin.
As our breathing slows, he kisses my forehead. I close my eyes enjoying the warmth of his body beneath mine. A hint of guilt niggles it’s way into my brain. I’m falling for Sam fast. Would Laura really be okay with me and Sam? Because I don’t want to let him go. Ever.
I shove the guilt away. She slept with his brother. It’s obvious she’s moved on. And I deserve this. She should be happy for me to finally be dating someone who treats me right as I would be for her. If she has that with Sam’s brother, I’d be ecstatic for her.
But I can’t help thinking, did I just make a huge mistake by not checking with her first?