18. Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Eighteen
Jackson
Sneaking upstairs and away from the noise of the various conversations going on all at once in the living room of my parent’s house, I walked into the quiet of my old bedroom. From the window, I had a perfect view of the backyard, and could see Aiden running around, chasing his cousins. Or being chased by them? At first glance it looked like a good game of tag, but then my niece started doing some kind of weird hand signals, and now I wasn’t sure. She could have been telling all of them off, or spell casting, for all I knew. With Natalie it could go either way. She was like my older sister and not shy about voicing how she thought things should go .
We’d spent the last several hours with him opening his presents, stuffing ourselves on cake and ice cream, before the kids had headed out to run off their energy in the yard.
Gripping my cell phone tightly, I debated if I should do what I came in here to do. What I had been dying to do for hours. Fuck, days. Ever since we had stepped off the plane, and been enveloped in big hugs from my parents.
Fucking call him already , my croc growled. You’re annoying me with this wishy washy, back and forth, bullshit. Call our mate!
Huffing out my own annoyed breath, I did just that. Rocking back and forth on my feet, while I waited for Robert to pick up. Glancing at my watch, I checked the time. It was Saturday afternoon, but I didn’t know what his plans for the day were.
“Hello,” his husky voice finally answered, sounding sleep rough and groggy.
“I miss you,” I blurted out, only to be met with silence. That wasn’t what I intended to say, but here we were. No pulling it back now, and it was the truth.
“Oh,” Robert breathed, sounding more awake now. “That’s…not what…I…oh.” His jaw cracked with what sounded like a yawn.
Frowning, I asked, “Did I wake you up?”
“Kind of.” There was the sound of rustling, and I could picture him straightening his blankets and sitting up in his bed. “I needed to get up, or I won’t sleep tonight, but I was so tired. It was a long week.”
Sitting on the edge of my bed, I ran one hand over the blue and green plaid pattern of my old bedspread. “Kids are exhausting, and I only have one to deal with.”
He chuckled softly, “That they are. How’s your trip?”
Running a hand through my hair, I sighed. “Fine. My parents and Levi’s mom are happy to see Aiden.”
“I’m sure they’re happy to see you too.”
“Yeah, but we all know they really just want to see the grandkid.”
“I can understand that.” He cleared his throat. “And, J, I miss you too.”
The grin that lit up my face could have lit all of New York City by itself. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” he breathed into the phone softly. “I didn’t think I would, but I do. You’ll be home Monday?”
“Monday afternoon. Robert, I–” I paused, my heart hammering in my chest with nerves.
When I was silent, Robert nudged me. “You what?”
“I want to tell Aiden about us,” I blurted out. Robert inhaled sharply, but before he could tell me all the reasons he had for me not telling my son about us, I continued on without stopping. “I know it’s early for us yet, but I’m serious about us. About you. We are something special. And I want to be honest with him that I’m dating someone. That I’m dating you. I don’t want to keep pawning him off on friends to watch and telling him I’m having dinner with friends. I want us to go out together sometimes, the three of us. I don’t want to hide you. I don’t want to hide us. But if you aren’t ready, or are uncomfortable, I understand.”
Silence crackled along the line again, and my heart was pounding so loudly in my ears I was afraid I might not even hear Robert when he did speak.
“I’m okay with you telling Aiden,” Robert finally broke the silence. “I…I think, yeah. I think I would like that. For us to do things together. The three of us.”
My alpha dad cleared his voice from the doorway, the sound deep and loud. My head whipped around, my eyes big, and I felt like a teenager, caught in his bedroom doing something he shouldn’t.
He held his hands out in a calming gesture, his lips quirked in a small smile. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to interrupt you. But Michelle just came in from outside with the kids and she’s a bit upset.”
Frowning, I put my hand over my phone. “About what?”
Levi’s mom was a lovely woman, most of the time. But she tended to get upset over small things that usually revolved around my parenting skills. Or what she perceived to be a lack of them. Granted, I hadn’t always been the most present after Levi died, but no one could deny that I loved my son more than anything on this earth .
Letting out a loud sigh, I told my dad I would be down in a few minutes.
Dad nodded, and once I heard his heavy footsteps echoing on the stairs, I pulled my hand away from my phone. “Sorry,” I apologized to Robert. “Two days here and I’m reduced to feeling like a teenager. I’m being summoned by Levi’s mother.”
“Should I send help?” Robert asked lightly, sounding much more awake than a few minutes ago.
“Possibly. I love her, I do, and she was a wonderful help to me after Levi passed. But sometimes she oversteps. I can’t imagine what I’ve managed to do since we got here. Can I call you tonight? I like hearing your voice,” I admitted. Texting was great, but hearing Robert in my ear made it seem like we weren’t thousands of miles apart.
“I’d like that.”
“I’ll talk to you tonight,” I promised. “Robert, I lo–”
Biting the word off before it could escape my mouth, I sat there, breathing hard, my muscles tense. Had he heard? Did he realize that I had almost admitted to loving him? To being in love with him?
This was not how I wanted the first time I told him I loved him to be. Not over the phone, where I couldn’t see his reaction, or kiss his lips.
Nope, not today. I needed to save that declaration for another time and place .
“I’ll talk to you tonight,” Robert whispered, his voice breathless. “Good-bye, J.”
Tucking my phone into my back pocket, I hurried down the stairs, only to be met with seven pairs of eyes staring at me in silence when I was back in the living room. My two dads, my older brother, his mate, and my older sister and her mate were all looking at me uncomfortably. While Levi’s mom, Michelle, was sitting stiffly in a chair, her arms crossed over her chest, lips pursed.
Fighting the urge to roll my eyes, I asked, “What? This better not be more BS about Aiden wearing feminine clothes, Michelle, because I’m not going to have that conversation with you again.”
“Jackson, watch your tone,” my omega dad, Devon, warned, his own tone telling me he didn’t care that I was a thirty-five year old alpha, I had better mind my manners.
“Sorry, Papa,” I apologized softly, taking a seat across from my parents.
My brother, Jason and his mate, Tobias, and my sister, Jasmine and her mate, Sherry, looked amused by Papa’s scolding me.
“Jackson,” Michelle began, turning to look at me. “Aiden has told me some frankly disturbing news.”
Here we go , my croc snapped his teeth sharply and I shushed him. Though I was feeling slightly snappish myself .
“Oh?” I arched a brow, crossing my own arms across my chest. “What’s that?”
“Aiden told me that you have been going out some nights to have dinner with friends, and you’ve left him with your boss.”
“Brendan has become a good friend,” I informed her. “He and his husband, Ryan, have a daughter, Charlie, and she and Aiden are friends. And, I’m allowed to have friends, Michelle. I’m allowed a social life.”
“No one is saying you aren’t allowed to go out.” My alpha dad, George, tried to soothe the situation.
“He also said you left him with these people,” Michelle continued and I inwardly bristled at the way she referred to Brendan and Ryan, “for several nights in a row, not too long after you got to Sweet Alps.”
“Jackson?” Papa asked, looking concerned, “Is that true? Son, that’s not like you.”
Michelle huffed, “You obviously don’t know your son that well, Devon. I can’t count how many times he would disappear for days on end and leave Aiden in my care.”
“Wait a damn minute!” I growled, jumping to my feet. “I was working, Michelle, and you know it. And you are the one that insisted,” I pointed a finger at her, not caring that I was being rude, “ insisted that you wanted to watch Aiden after Levi…after Levi died.”
I saw the tears well in her blue eyes, but I couldn’t make myself stop to care enough. Levi had been her only child, her world after her husband had been killed in a car accident when Levi was ten.
Levi’s death had hit her exceptionally hard. She’d lost her only child, but I’d lost my husband. My mate. My whole fucking world. Had I always handled it the best? No. Had I grieved the way she had thought I should. Also, probably not. But grief was a funny thing, that didn’t look the same on every person. It ebbed and flowed and had a way of hitting you out of nowhere, at the oddest times. A part of me would always grieve Levi, but I wanted to live.
Robert made me want to live. He had made me realize just how numb I had been inside for years.
“Son,” Dad was holding out his large hands once more, in the way he did when he thought things were getting a “bit out of hand”, as he liked to say. “We're just worried about you and Aiden.”
“You’re so far away,” Papa said softly, his eyes sad.
Closing my eyes, I took a calming breath, slowly counting to ten. Finally, I looked at my well-meaning family, and said, “I was with a friend. He…was in heat. And I helped him.”
Jason hid a grin behind his hand and a cough, grunting when Tobias pinched his side. For once, Jasmine said nothing, keeping her opinions to herself. Though I was sure she had plenty to say, she usually did.
“You helped a friend through his heat?” Michelle said the question slowly, her tone full of disapproval .
“You know what, fine,” I told the room. “I was planning to tell you all once I spoke to my son , but if you’re going to force my hand.” Waving my arms out in surrender, I admitted, “I haven’t been having dinner with friends. I’ve been having dinner with my fated mate.”
The gasps in the room were many and varied. “He is the one that was in heat, and I spent his heat with him. His name is Robert, and he’s…” I tried to find the words to aptly describe Robert. “He’s wonderful.”
Michelle looked pale and shell-shocked, and I took the seat next to her. Taking her cold hand in mine, I cradled it gently. “You know I loved Levi. More than anything in this world. And I will never forget him as long as I live. But there was a part of me that was dying inside. When I met Robert, when we discovered we were fated, it took both of us by surprise. Meeting him…I felt myself come alive again. So yes, Aiden was with my friends for those days. He was safe, well taken care of, and happy. And yes, he’s stayed with them a few hours while Robert and I have gone out. But I’m planning to tell Aiden this weekend about us.” Looking around at my family, I added, “On the plane. In private. Robert and I both agreed we want to spend more time doing things together, the three of us.”
“Robert?” Michelle asked quietly. “Aiden was telling me all about his teacher at the daycare, Mr. Robert.”
I nodded. “That’s him.”
“Oh, I got the impression he was an older omega. ”
Jason snorted, “Well, we all know Jackson likes his omegas older.”
Flipping my brother off, I mouthed a silent, Fuck you . Only to catch my two dads frowning fiercely at me. “Sorry, Papa. Sorry, Dad.”
“Well,” Papa said, his hands in his lap, “this has been quite a surprise. Jackson, are you happy?”
“Very,” I told him.
“Then we can’t wait to meet him,” Papa declared, and I gave him a grateful smile.
“Please,” I pleaded with my family. “Don’t say a word to Aiden about Robert and me. This is a conversation I need to have with him alone.”