Chapter 33
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
IVY
If I could rate this day on a scale of one to ten, one being the worst ever and ten being the best day of my life, this one would get a negative fifty-seven.
What a shit-tastic day.
My legs are tired and stiff as they carry me out to my truck from the hospital, and once inside, I sit for a moment before starting the engine.
But do I immediately pull out of my parking space?
No.
Because that would require energy, so I grab my phone and power it on for the first time since I arrived at the hospital twelve hours ago and see that I’ve missed some texts from Xander.
Xander: You forgot your emotional support water bottle. Be sure to drink water today, Red.
Xander: Did you eat lunch?
Did I? No. Because I never took a break long enough to go hunt down a bottle of water or eat something. I haven’t had anything since the yogurt before I left the house this morning, and my head is screaming at me.
Xander: I miss you. Come home.
I smile at that one. It came in about an hour ago. Rather than use up the energy to type, I call him.
“Tell me you’re almost home,” he says into my ear, and his voice alone makes me want to cry.
“I’m sitting in the truck at the hospital,” I reply softly.
“What’s wrong, baby?”
“Just a shitty day. I’m okay. I’m hungry as fuck and really crabby, though.”
“Do you need me to come get you? I can be there in twenty.”
I shake my head. “No, I’m coming now. I apologize in advance for all the mean things I might say tonight out of hunger and exhaustion.”
He snickers in my ear, and it makes me smile a little. “You’re forgiven in advance. Come on home, I have lasagna in the oven, and I’ll run you a hot bath.”
“Oh, you’re my favorite boyfriend.”
He laughs again. “Better be the only boyfriend.”
“Duh. Okay, I’ll see you in a few.”
I hang up and blow out a breath before I put the truck in gear and pull out of the parking lot.
I know that days like today aren’t normal.
It was extra busy, and there was a dementia patient who had fallen and hurt his hip, and I had to work with him while he kept asking me when his parents would come pick him up.
God, it about broke me every single time.
Because I can’t help but wonder if that’ll be Xander someday. Will his memory get worse and worse as he gets older? Will there come a day when he looks at me and his eyes are empty because he doesn’t remember who I am?
It would fucking kill me.
I know he’s okay. He has pockets of memory issues, but aside from missing a word here and there, he’s fine.
But what if he gets hurt again? He has every intention of going back to hockey, for God knows how many more years, and if he continues to sustain concussions, his memory could get worse and worse.
And that terrifies me.
But I also don’t want to be the asshole girlfriend who tells him to give up on his dreams. I’m never going to do that, and if the doctors say he’s fit to play, then who am I to say otherwise?
It still scares me, though, and because of the rough day at work, I feel extra emotional tonight.
I finally pull into the driveway, and Xander’s already waiting for me on the porch. He’s standing there, barefoot, his hands tucked in the pockets of his blue jeans, wearing a blue flannel over a black T-shirt.
And just the sight of him immediately settles my nerves.
As I pull to a stop, Xander rounds the back of the truck and opens my door for me, holding his hand out for my bag, which I pass to him.
“Hi, baby,” he says softly and leans in to kiss my lips. “Come on, let’s get you fed.”
“Okay.”
My voice sounds so small, even to my own ears, and I follow him up to the house.
“You’re not wearing shoes,” I say as he holds the door open for me. “It’s too cold for that.”
“I’ll be fine. I live my life on ice, remember?” He turns to walk deeper into the house, but I tug on his hand, and when he turns to me, I walk into him, press my face to his chest, and hold on tight. “Hey. Hey, I’m right here.”
With a deep inhale, I breathe him in and let it settle my rough edges.
“I’m so sorry you had a rough day,” he says against my head before pressing a kiss to my crown. “How can I help?”
“You’re doing it,” I reply. “Okay, I’ll eat now.”
He kisses me once more and then simply lifts me in his arms, and I don’t fight him or tell him he shouldn’t carry me.
I bury my face in his neck and wrap my legs around his waist and hold on as he walks easily through the house and then deposits me on a stool at the island.
“Cassie made the lasagna, and it smells fucking good,” he says as he pulls a deep baking dish out of the oven, sets it on the stovetop, and then dives back in for what looks like garlic bread. “There’s salad too.”
“Just lasagna and bread for me,” I tell him. “I want carbs.”
“I know it’s been a shit day when you request carbs, so what happened and who do I have to annihilate?”
I smile softly. “It was back to back all day. Hip replacement that was tricky, pneumonia patient that I had to work on breathing with, a baby with a broken shoulder, and I don’t want to know how it got that fracture.”
He frowns as he passes me the plate and then leans on the counter. “Do you think a parent did it?”
“Probably.” I cut a bite with my fork, blow on it, and then shove it in my mouth and sigh as I chew the miraculous food. “So good.”
He’s standing across from me so he can see me, eating his own meal. He was good, though, and made himself some salad.
Whatever. There’s spinach in this lasagna. I’m good too.
“It was a lot for the first day back,” I tell him and shift my shoulders, trying to stretch them out. “I don’t mean to complain—”
“Complain, Red. That’s what I’m here for. When shit’s tough, we eat dinner and talk about it. This is what it looks like for the rest of our lives. So, if you had a bad day, I want to hear everything. And trust me, I’ll be telling you all about mine too.”
“That sounds like a fair trade,” I tell him with a soft smile.
“I can’t tell you specifics, but it was a long fucking day.
And because we’re short staffed, it’s not like I could call someone in to help me.
So it was back to back. This is the first meal I’ve had since before I left here this morning. ”
He frowns over at me. “That’s not enough food.”
“Yeah, tell me about it. My head is pounding. And no, I didn’t drink any water.” I pick up the tumbler and take a long drink.
“Quit the fucking job, Red.”
I blink at him. “Come again?”
“Quit. I hate that you’re working yourself to exhaustion. You don’t even love this part of it.”
“I need my job, Xander.”
He looks like he’s about to get frustrated, but then he takes a breath, pops more food in his mouth, and watches me.
“I think we both know that you don’t need the job,” he says.
I, too, stay calm as I watch him in return and chew a bite of bread.
God, I love bread. And Cassie makes the best ever.
“You know that I’m not with you for the money,” I say. “But it’s not just that. I like to work. I’m good at it. There just aren’t any teams here that need a full-time physical therapist.”
“I’ve heard rumors that there might be a minor league baseball team coming into Bitterroot Valley in a couple of years,” he says and starts tapping on his phone. “Yep, says here that the stadium is breaking ground in the spring.”
“Where is it?” I ask him with a frown.
“I think they’re putting it on the edge of town out where that old sawmill used to be.”
“It’s been abandoned since before I was born. Time to put something there, I guess.” I take my last bite of food. “Too bad it isn’t hockey. You could coach there someday.”
He lifts an eyebrow but doesn’t say anything. He clears our plates away and then circles the island, and when he’s in front of me, he dusts his fingertips over my freckles.
“How about that bath?” he asks.
“That sounds really good.”
“Come here.” He lifts me again, and I stop him when we get to the stairs.
“I’ll walk up. I don’t want you to put too much pressure on the knee.”
He kisses me before setting me down. “So much for being romantic.”
“Are you kidding? You’re drawing me a bath.” I climb the stairs and feel his gaze behind me. “And you’re staring at my ass.”
“Of course I am. It’s right there.”
“Hard to miss,” I say with a laugh, and then we’re at the top of the stairs and he tosses me over his shoulder and smacks my ass. “Hey!”
“Say shit about the love of my life one more time, Red.”
“It’s a true statement. I have a peach ass.”
“And it’s one of my favorite things about you.”
I smirk when he sets me on my feet. “Whatever.”
“Strip.”
I lift an eyebrow. “Now you’re being romantic.”
Xander laughs, starts the water in the huge freestanding soaking tub, and then turns to me.
“Want help?” He looks eager for me to say yes, and it makes me smirk.
“If you help me, the water will be cold by the time I get in it.”
I back out of his reach and start to take off my green scrubs. When I’m down to just panties and a bra, his eyes darken and he licks his bottom lip.
“Christ, you’re fucking beautiful.”
“Aww.” I reach up and pat his cheek. “Thanks. Are you going to get naked and join me?”
“No.”
I stick my lower lip out in a pout, and it makes him laugh.
“Get in, wildcat.” He takes my hand and leads me to the tub, holding on as I step into the steamy water and lower myself in, letting out a groan. “Good? Not too hot?”
“Damn perfect,” I reply with a sigh and lean back so I can lounge in the heat of the water.
Xander makes sure my braid is hanging out of the tub, and then he grabs my hairbrush and starts to undo the plait. Before he brushes it, he drags his fingers through it all, making me moan.
“I love it when you play with my hair.”
He hums behind me, and then he gets to work brushing it. He drags the bristles through the hair at my scalp, careful not to tug too hard.
It’s amazing how easy it is for him to make me relax. To make me forget all the horrible feelings from my day and help me feel calm.
When he’s finished brushing, he twists my thick hair to the top of my head and uses a claw clip to hold it there so it doesn’t get wet.
“I’ll be back,” he says as he stands and leans over to press a kiss to my forehead.
“I’ll be here.”