Chapter 32
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
I fucking hated it
Ryker
I was mindlessly doom scrolling when Ruby walked into the kitchen more than an hour later, wearing a strappy top under a brown suede bomber, paired with dark jeans cinched at the waist with a belt.
Her freshly cut hair was pushed over one shoulder, with her eyes appearing extra blue without her glasses.
I forced myself to look away, knowing that if I obsessed over how good she looked, I’d end up back at square one.
“Where’s Gretchen?” I checked.
“She’s still getting ready. Her makeup routine takes longer than mine. Who would’ve guessed?”
Not even someone with a sponge for a brain could’ve missed the sarcasm.
“I know what you’re going to say, Rubz.”
“I’m sorry, that sounded bitchy,” Ruby admitted with a wince, sinking her teeth into her lower lip.
“Honestly, Gretchen seems really nice. Don’t get me wrong, she’s exactly the type I imagined you with.
But just because she’s not my kind of girl doesn’t mean I won’t make the effort to get along with her.
If she matters to you, she matters to me too. ”
I hadn’t had a chance to talk to Gretchen and ask what the hell she was playing at, so who knows what they’d talked about up there. After I’d stepped out of the bathroom, freshly showered and dressed, she’d been quick to usher me out of my own room so that she and Ruby could have some girl time.
I was assuming this was her way of helping me make Ruby jealous or something, but based on how casual Ruby was acting, it wasn’t fucking working. And truthfully, the whole situation was making me uneasy. I didn’t play games. Least of all with Ruby.
“Hey, Rubz?”
“Yeah?”
I took a deep breath, drawing on every scrap of confidence for this long-overdue conversation. “About last time you stayed, I–”
“I’m happy to pretend it didn’t happen too,” Ruby rushed out, her grip tightening around the neck of the vodka bottle on the counter.
Something in my chest ruptured, most likely an artery or my dignity.
Was that what she truly wished for? Or was she just going along with it because she thought it’s what I wanted? She’d never been one to shy away from an honest conversation, but pushing her to talk about it after she’d just told me to pretend it hadn’t happened felt like a dick move.
Evan strutted into the room, all dressed up and drowning in enough cologne to kill every insect within a ten mile radius. I sneezed the instant he got within range of me.
“Ruby.” He stretched out the two syllables, like saying her name was a thrill. “I heard Tori is trying to set you up with Joey Nazaar.”
Ruby shrugged. “I’m ready to move on.”
“If that’s your goal, gorgeous, move on with me. I’ll show you a hell of a better time than he will.”
Ruby barked out a laugh. “Would it be just the two of us?”
“It can be more if you’re keen to give it a go. Now that you’re single, it’s time to experiment.”
With an amused expression, Ruby poured herself a drink, heavy on the vodka. “We’ll see.”
*
Dinner had been a bust. I’d ended up sitting between Gretchen and Lindsay at one end of the table, as far from Ruby as possible. The closest thing I had to a friend was Pat, but he was so busy trying to impress Lindsay that he made boring company.
Now the rest of the team were arriving in droves, and the private dinner was over. Thank fuck, because Evan and Ruby had been looking way too intimate. At one point, he’d been whispering in her ear. Fuck knows what he was saying, but the blush that’d covered her skin had given me an idea.
I’d never wanted to wring his neck more. I was jealous – there was no other explanation. The feeling was new to me, and I had no idea how to handle it.
When Joey Nazaar walked through the front door, it pushed me over the edge. He’d clearly taken extra time getting ready tonight. His typically scruffy hair was styled, and he was wearing an ironed button down as opposed to his usual hoodie or tee.
“What’s up with you?” Tori quietly muttered under her breath.
She was on one side of me and Gretchen was on the other, chatting with Lindsay and Pat about her plans next year. Until tonight, I hadn’t known she modelled. I guess I’d never cared enough to ask.
“Nothing,” I grumbled.
Tori snorted. “Tell that to the beer label you ripped to shreds during dinner.”
She could blame Evan for that. Speaking of the douchebag, I hadn’t seen him for a while... or Ruby for that matter.
“Do you find Evan attractive?” I asked.
“Are you kidding? He’s like Ryan Gosling from Barbie. Just a less plastic version.”
“Is that a good thing?”
“Definitely. The guy is hot.”
A growl slipped out before I could stop it. I was turning into a full-blown caveman. Hell, I was turning into Levi Holloway. At least he had an excuse to feel that way about his girlfriend. I had no business acting the same way over a friend.
Tori’s face lit up as she spotted Joey across the room. He waved before heading this way.
“Did you really need to do that?” I complained.
“Do what?”
“Set him up with, Ruby.”
“I didn’t think it’d be a problem.”
“I didn’t say it was.”
“Sure. Because asking if Evan is attractive and getting annoyed at Joey is totally normal.” Tori lifted her drink to her lips, her eyes glimmering with amusement. “You’re either clueless or in worse denial than I realised.”
If only she knew I was well beyond both of those things.
Gretchen reached for my hand, threading her fingers through mine. “I need the bathroom. Can I use yours?”
I went to list off the combination for my electric lock, but caught myself in time. Ruby and I were the only people who knew the code. Having set it in freshman year, I couldn’t remember how to change it.
“Sure. I’ll take you.”
Perfect excuse to dodge Joey who was closing in on us.
Gretchen stayed close behind me as we climbed the stairs, her hand lightly resting on my lower back. When we reached the top, I tried using the vantage point to search for Ruby – or even Evan – but came up short. Fuck knows where they were.
Outside my room, I shielded the keypad with my body like I was protecting launch codes, before nudging the door open.
Gretchen headed straight for the bathroom, bypassing the mess on the floor.
My usually tidy-ish room had things strewn everywhere.
While Ruby’s suitcase was neatly perched in the corner, Gretchen’s duffle was overspilling with clothes, makeup and other girly things that I had no clue what they were used for.
I’d never had a girl’s overnight bag in my room... besides Ruby’s.
I’d never been driven crazy simply by kissing a girl... other than with Ruby.
I’d never wanted to murder Evan before – or Joey for that matter – until they’d shown an interest in Ruby.
I was starting to sense a theme here...
I liked Ruby.
I liked my best friend.
But given she’d run off after I kissed her and then told me she wanted to pretend it hadn’t happened, it wasn’t exactly promising that she felt the same way.
When Gretchen came out of the bathroom, she headed straight for the mirror to adjust her short dress. That dress would’ve had me drooling a few months ago. But now? Zilch.
“Care to fill me in on the charade?” I asked, meeting Gretchen’s gaze through the mirror.
“Charade?”
“Pretending we’re dating, or whatever it is you’re doing.”
“Oh. I thought it would help with your best friend drama. Jealousy has a way of revealing people’s true feelings.”
“Ruby doesn’t feel a thing. She told me to act like it never happened.”
“Ouch. I’m sorry,” Gretchen winced, sounding sincere.
While the cheerleaders at Phil-U had a reputation for stirring up drama, Gretchen seemed like an exception. Lindsay and Kyah had always come across as nice enough too. Maybe the reputation only stuck because their captain, Summer Spritz, was the very definition of a mean girl.
Gretchen faced me, her glossy lower lip pulled between her teeth.
“I apologise if I overstepped. I honestly just stopped by to check your room so that I could get into the gym. But then when Ruby introduced herself... I got a little carried away.” Her shoulders slumped with defeat. “I thought it might help.”
I brushed her apology off. “It doesn’t matter. Nothing is going to happen with Ruby and me. We’re just friends.”
I’d spent my whole life telling people that, but now it was beginning to leave a bitter taste in my mouth. I didn’t want to stop being friends, but I wanted to shake the just part.
We’re friends who kiss.
We’re friends who touch.
We’re friends who fool around.
“We don’t have to head back down yet if you’re not ready,” Gretchen said, slowly kneeling in front of me and resting her hands on my thighs. “I haven’t given you my birthday present yet.”
If I was to guess, my gift was likely her birthday outfit. Despite having enjoyed that ridiculously perky gift before, the thought of it did nothing to me anymore.
The last time we’d hooked up, I’d been trying to distract myself from the fact that I was seeing Ruby in a way I shouldn’t. Now I knew those feelings were more than just attraction, the idea of another girl made my skin crawl.
Sensing my lack of interest, Gretchen got back to her feet and looked around the room. Her curious eyes landed on Warren. He was perched on a chair beside the mirror, looking as green as ever. I’d watered him this morning.
“I didn’t take you as a green thumb.”
“It was a gift from Ruby in freshman year,” I explained. “I’ve somehow kept it alive the past four years.”
“Props. My indoor plants never last more than a week.” She continued to snoop, moving around until she reached the perfume on the dresser. “Do you mind if I use this?”
I nodded. “It’s Ruby’s. I’m sure she wouldn’t care.”
Before she could spray it, her attention snagged on something else. “Why are there socks on your ceiling fan? Wait... let me guess. Ruby.”
My silence said it all.
“You really want to be with her, don’t you, Ryker?”
Yes. Maybe. I didn’t know. But what I did know was that I didn’t want to be with Gretchen.
“Gretchen, I–”
“It’s fine. It’s not like you weren’t up front about needing a distraction. I’ve had fun...” She wrinkled her nose. “But not enough to spend any more time on a guy who’s clearly into someone else.”
A tight bubble formed in my throat. “I’m sorry–”
With a dismissive laugh, she crouched down and began gathering her things. “Relax, Richardson. I’m not going to pine over you until the day I die. We’re good. I promise.”
I’d never been through a breakup before, and I wouldn’t even consider this one, but watching her pack her things was still incredibly awkward. I thought about helping, but worried I’d get in the way, I stayed put.
Once she’d packed up, we headed downstairs.
I wasn’t sure if calling things off with Gretchen would backfire for Pat, Kyler and their cheerleaders, but in all honesty, I couldn’t bring myself to care.
All that mattered to me was finding Ruby and finally admitting I couldn’t pretend the kiss hadn’t happened.
Before she got swallowed up by the crowd, Gretchen stopped, glancing over her shoulder at me. “For what it’s worth, Ryker... Ruby was lying. Your kisses aren’t the type a girl wants to forget.”
I prayed like hell she was right.
Once she was gone, I wasted no time searching the house for Ruby, checking every room – including the basement and den – but came up empty.
The team had taken over the living room, playing video games. Joey was there, which was equally as worrying as it was reassuring. Because if Ruby wasn’t with him, there was only one other person she might be with.
After my second lap, I returned to the yard, where Tori and Brady were hanging out with a crowd around the bonfire.
Brady spotted me stalking across the lawn. “Hey, man. Where have you–”
“Have you seen Ruby?” I interrupted, not in the mood for small talk.
“We haven’t,” Tori answered, glancing up from where she sat in Brady’s lap. “Why? What’s up?”
Kyler stumbled into me, smelling of beer and weed. I opened my mouth to scold him, but found the argument dying off. The season was over. Keeping his piss tests clean wasn’t my issue anymore.
“I saw her before,” he slurred.
“Where?”
“You’ll never guess.”
I rolled my eyes. “If I’m never going to guess, just tell me.”
“She went upstairs with Evan.”
He was right. I never would’ve guessed that. I didn’t particularly like hearing it either. In fact, I fucking hated it.